The Vessel
by White Ink Penpal
Summary: I started out as a girl without memories in a foreign land, and life took a turn for the worse after that. Sakura-centric. Pairing undecided.
1. Prologue: Fall

**Reading guide for this chapter:**

"Normal talk."

_"Japanese."_

_"**Jutsu.**"_

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything from both SnK and Naruto. I do own the plot, however. I also do not own the image but credit to the anime.**

* * *

The first thing she remembered was falling.

Her body ached, especially her stomach, and she could tell that her shoulder was dislocated and her ankle was sprained. How did she know this? Oh, she was a medical ninja, yes, that's why. Her arms shook in restrained pain, and there was a dull throb in the back of her head that, although not life threatening, was incredibly uncomfortable to the point of eliciting a groan.

The ground was soft, and she could feel both the sun beating on the parts of her body not covered by a shade. She blearily opened her eyes and observed the thick trees with mild fascination. They reminded her of something, _somewhere_, but she couldn't exactly remember what exactly. The lack of knowledge irked her, but at the same time she had other things to worry about at the moment.

She carefully got up, hoping not to make her injuries worse. She knew any normal person would have been rendered useless from such pain, but she managed to handle it just fine. Some would say mind over matter but... Yes, she had a high tolerance for pain because she was a medical kunoichi.

Ah, there it was. She was a kunoichi, sworn to defend...

She frowned. Her memories seemed to stop there, or at least that was all she could retrieve at the moment. Her name, though...

Her name was Sakura, though she couldn't quite remember her last name, even after she went through different words in her mind; none of them sounded familiar.

The kunoichi frowned momentarily, but then shrugged, or at least attempted to before the pain made her grimace. Well, it was nigh time to try to heal these injuries anyway.

She placed her hands over her ribs and let her subconscious lead her movements, since she didn't quite remember how to use medical ninjutsu to begin with. The familiar green light relaxed her and alleviated her body, but she panicked when the light faded almost immediately. Her body suddenly felt very heavy again, and she cursed herself for not realizing her chakra exhaustion first and foremost.

It's not that she didn't recognize it... More that she forgot how it felt...

* * *

The next time she woke up she was in a much softer place, possibly a bed. She felt the pressure of bandages in her ribs and ankle, the dull ache of her rather well-set shoulder, and the wetness of a cloth on her forehead. Sakura opened her eyes and wasn't surprised to see a wooden roof. The light seeping through the small window in her room gave the impression of mid-morning, maybe around nine, which meant that she had passed out for at least a day. That was a sound judgement considering her chakra reserves had improved from the day before.

She gingerly got up, making sure not to agitate her wounds any further. After double-checking her reserves to not make yesterday's blunder, she placed her hands over her ribs and felt the cooling of her chakra mending her broken bones. After a couple of minutes the tightness in her chest dissipated completely and she could breathe easily once again. She wanted to carry on to finish the job with her shoulder and ankle, but she was still not in her full strength and didn't want to cause another chakra exhaustion.

Sakura sat at the edge of the bed and warily observed her surroundings. Her bed was at the far side of the room, with a night stand next to it with a lamp that seemed to burn on oil. Her whole room was made out of wood, which was slightly dangerous if her lamp really did burn oil. Other than the bed and nightstand, the room was devoid of any furniture.

Her sensitive ears heard slow, light tread in the other side of the house. The house must've been small, because maybe even without her chakra-enhanced hearing she might've heard the footsteps of this home's inhabitant. The frailty behind the movement was weak, which meant that if need be, Sakura could quickly eliminate the threat and be on her way. Though the ruthlessness behind her thoughts surprised a small part of her mind, a larger part of her psyche was more focused on keeping her alive.

She got up and made her way to the door, making sure to slowly push it open so as to not attract any attention. A small woman with gray hair was washing her dishes in the sink, though she got the water from a bucket. The sight shouldn't have surprised her, but for some reason she found it odd. There must've been an easier way to get water... right?

"Hello?"

The old woman dropped a dish and whirled around, staring at her with wide brown eyes. Her face was wrinkled and not well treated, and her yellow shirt and beige skirt were dull from use. Speaking of which, the woman must've changed her out of her ninja clothes and lent her the white shirt and black skirt she was wearing. Though the airiness was comfortable, she preferred her pants.

"I... I just wanted to thank you for helping me with my injuries. I could have died out there so for that... Is there something wrong?"

The woman just stared at her, and her mouth opened slightly.

Sakura looked around, trying to find the source of her astonishment, but she found none. She turned back to the woman and cleared her throat awkwardly. "Um, is there something in my face?"

The woman opened her mouth, and Sakura wanted to whimper when she heard what the woman said.

She didn't understand a single word.

* * *

_All that I knew was that my name was Sakura, and that I could heal and fight._

_I didn't know where I came from, whom I was supposed to protect, or where I was._

_The moment she spoke in a language I couldn't understand was the moment I truly broke._

_Because that was when I realized I was alone, and no one would recognize me._

* * *

The first week was a bit awkward for both Sakura and Helsa. Most of their communication resembled a crude game of charades, if they even managed to get their point across. What Sakura did manage to convey with growing proficiency was her hunger and thirst, which Helsa regarded with open amusement. Though she didn't understand where she was or how she got there, Sakura detested the idea of being a free loader and helped Helsa with whatever she could, especially the more physical chores.

They lived around thirty minutes from the nearest town, near the woods where Helsa had found an unconscious Sakura. Helsa had taken her there three days after her arrival, and although she couldn't understand a word that anyone said, Sakura knew she was asking around to see if anyone knew her. Sakura knew she was pretty unforgettable; her pink hair and bright green eyes made her almost impossible to forget or not recognize.

However, Helsa's attempts were always met with a shake of the head.

It was in the first week that Sakura's depression set in. It was not that she missed anyone, because she realized that her amnesia had taken a new form and she couldn't remember absolutely anybody other than herself, and even that was a rather blurry. What caused her to sink in the depths of despair was her loneliness. Not only was she unable to communicate with anyone, but she quickly found out she was the only one with the ability to manipulate chakra, making her somewhat of an anomaly in this world. Even gentle Helsa became a bit wary the first time Sakura lifted a table with ease. Soon after that she quickly learned to gauge Helsa's strength and mimicked a slightly enhanced version of hers to appear more normal, but she knew Helsa wasn't going to forget.

So here she was, lonely and a freak. Maybe it was a small blessing to have amnesia, because she knew she wouldn't be able to cope with the homesickness.

However, what started as an uncomfortable relationship soon became a relaxing companionship in a matter of weeks. Sakura's worries of being kicked out of Helsa's home faded once she realized the old woman liked having her around, even if she wasn't that great of a conversation partner. Her fears were completely squashed when Helsa brought a notebook and pencil one day and beckoned Sakura to sit down on their small table. She drew pictures and wrote next to them in a foreign alphabet, sounding them out and pointing at her artwork.

Nouns were the easiest for her to learn, but verbs proved to be tricky. Helsa tried her best to draw them and explain what was going on, but Sakura was having problems conveying her sentences, and her attempts usually ended with sheepish smiles and toothless laughs.

"The girl run forest?" Sakura asked in broken German.

Helsa shook her head and said, "Wrong verb."

"_This is all so_ _frustrating_," Sakura muttered in her native tongue. Both women sat there, staring at the notebook as if it had the answers to their problems. And in hindsight, the notebook had been the answer to her problems before, but now they were starting to understand the limitations the notebook brought. There was no way Sakura could become proficient in a language with just that.   


The woman stood up and slid her chair back in. "Come... going to market." Though Sakura had problems conveying her thoughts, she was picking up on what Helsa said with ease, at least when she used simple verbs like "going to" and overused nouns like "market."

Sakura readied the basket meanwhile Helsa went for her money in her room. She had been curious as to what Helsa did for a living, considering she didn't have a husband or son that could work the fields. A couple of days after their meeting Sakura had seen her sewing her pants and long-sleeved shirt, and she realized that her savior had a knack for sewing. In fact, she later deduced that the worn clothes they had were her own creations, which were quiet popular in Beinn, the town they frequented.

The walk there was peaceful, as it always was. Sakura found trees to be strangely relaxing and familiar, though the reason was a mystery considering her memories were inaccessible. She had tried to communicate that to Helsa to see if she had any recommendations, but she didn't know how to _show _amnesia. She settled for saying "forgot my life," which elicited a sad look from Helsa, a reply she couldn't understand, and a quiet dinner.

Sakura hadn't brought the topic again.

Beinn's commercial district was bustling with activity, with horses moving carts filled with goods and people bartering for food and produce in stalls on the streets. Even though people already knew of Sakura's existence, she still managed to turn a few heads towards her, and it always made her blush under the pressure of the stares.

They approached a stall that sold Sakura's favorite potatoes, but instead of the usual blond seller, there was a woman with long black hair and happy dark eyes. Helsa seemed rather content about this, because they started chatting animatedly to the point that Sakura easily lost track of the conversation. She knew that the topic was about their lives, at least until Helsa said her name.

"...Sakura––"

"Sakura?" the black haired woman repeated, confused.

Helsa nodded and started explaining their meeting, if the words "forest," "hurt," and "living" were of any indication. The black haired woman was very interested in her, though, to the point that Sakura became uncomfortable and started browsing the potatoes to see which ones they would take.

"_Do you understand what I am saying?" _the woman asked in Japanese.

Sakura whipped her head up and stared at her with wide eyes. Yes, there was a very noticeable accent, but her sentence structure and delivery were almost flawless. "_I do... How do you know what I am__ saying?"_  


Her answer seemed to please her greatly, because she smiled widely, showing her slightly yellow teeth. "_My grandparents came from a land far away where they spoke this language, however it seems I am the last one that does. Your name is very beautiful, Sakura-san; even though I never saw them, that was all my grandmother ever talked about."_  


She bowed slightly in respect and acceptance of her compliment. "_Thank you very much... Well, this is rude of me, but what is your name?"_

The woman blinked and laughed nervously. "_Oh, if my grandmother heard me she would be very disappointed of me. My name is Mikoto Ackerman, though I guess you would say it Ackerman Mikoto."_

_"It is a pleasure to meet you, Ackerman-san."_

Mikoto turned to talk to Helsa for a couple of minutes. Since Sakura couldn't quite follow the conversation very well, she settled for observing her expressions. The Japanese woman was visibly ecstatic, but there was a wariness behind Helsa's eyes that disappeared the more Mikoto talked. Eventually Helsa agreed to whatever Mikoto was proposing, which made her grin in happiness.

"_Ah, Sakura-san, what would you say if you came to my house every day to learn our language? Helsa tells me that she reached the end of what she can teach you, but there is still much for you to learn."_

The pink-haired girl blinked in wonder, but then she smiled widely and nodded enthusiastically to both Mikoto and Helsa. "_That would be wonderful! I would love to be able to have a conversation with Helsa without trying to guess what we're saying."_

Mikoto laughed and translated what Sakura said for Helsa to enjoy. She grinned, showing her lack of teeth, and nodded along with her statement. Sakura couldn't help but feel a bout of warmth for the woman right then, considering that she knew her hesitance was not for her fear of Sakura being distracted, but of trusting someone else with the well-being of her housemate.

However, Sakura knew that somewhere in Helsa's mind she was remembering her freakish strength and that must've assuaged her doubts.

* * *

_Even though I didn't have precious people to protect, I could see myself wanting to protect Helsa, the woman who nursed and trusted a stranger with the remnants of her youth._

* * *

_Six Months Later_

_ October 8th, 842_

"Mikasa, can you bring the plates please?"

Sakura saw her trip before she started falling and quickly took the plates and righted the younger girl with her other hand. Mikasa stared at her with wide gray eyes, astonished at her ability and swiftness, but Sakura just winked at her and placed an index finger in front of her mouth playfully. The girl nodded gravely and mimicked her gesture, the action so somber that it made her giggle.

"_What are you two up to?" _Mikoto asked, her voice light and amused.

"_Nothing,"_ they replied in unison and giggled together.

"Help, Ackerman-san?" Sakura asked, eyeing the heavy laundry in Mikoto's arms. Though her speech was still heavily-accented, she could now quickly form sentences in her head with simple verbs, something Mikoto was pleasantly impressed about, considering her limited training. Sakura deduced she must've been someone smart prior to losing her memory, something that made her chest swell with pride.

"Oh, no, don't worry, Sakura. I heard that Erick needed help in the fields. Help there?"

Sakura agreed wordlessly, quickly heading out to their fields and spotting Mr. Ackerman working with his prized potatoes. Though Sakura had kept her powers as a kunoichi hidden for the sake of fitting in, both the Ackermans and Helsa knew about her freakish strength, and they didn't hesitate to request her help. She didn't mind, though; the times were rough and they could use every able-bodied person at their disposal. In fact, it made Sakura happy to know she could be of any use to them.

Erick Ackerman had started out as a very quiet, reserved man, but he had soon warmed to his wife's pupil and showed his kind, happy personality that he only seemed to have around Mikasa and Mikoto. He had showed her how to plough a field as well as check the overall health of the crops, which was quite the feat considering the lack of available communication.

Both of them lost track of time, too engrossed in their work, and only realized the sun would soon set when Mikoto calmed them back. Sakura wiped her brow and walked inside, already thinking about the excuse she would have to give Helsa for her tardiness. Though she had only been with her for half a year, Helsa considered Sakura like a granddaughter and protected her as such. She had confided to her that she had lost both her husband and son to the titans, tall humanoid creatures that inhabited this world and preyed on humans. It had apparently been an accident, because they belonged to the military division that was less involved in combat, the Garrison, but it had happened and so here she was, a widow and childless.

The worst part was that she was barely forty but she looked old enough to be a grandmother.

"Oh, Sakura, are you going to have dinner?"

She shook her head and chuckled nervously. "Helsa must be mad. I am... ah... after hour? _Late?_"

"Late," Mikoto supplied gently.

"Yes, I am late."

Mikasa placed two plates on opposing chairs and Erick soon followed, placing another pair. They all looked at each other and grinned at Sakura. "Well, there's four plates set, so I guess it would be a shame to waste so much food, right?" Erick, though kind, was quite sneaky and knew how to get what he wanted.

Sakura sighed but she didn't restrain the smile that blossomed in her face. She had been a bit nervous that there was the possibility that she would never get her memories back, but being surrounded by such wonderful people eased those worries and she soon realized that she didn't miss those memories, because she had Helsa and Mikoto and Mikasa and Erick to make new memories with.

Dinner was particularly eventful as Mikasa related her encounter with the laws of nature right on her gardens. The strong dominated the weak... It was both an inter and intra-species law, applied mercilessly and almost without fail. That Mikasa had noticed it at such early age was testament of her heightened perception and intelligence.

She would make a suitable pupil when she grew a bit older. Perhaps Mikoto or Erick would let her teach Mikasa a bit of taijutsu later on? Well, first she had to go over the movements herself, of course. Even though she innately remembered what she was supposed to do, just like breathing, Sakura didn't think she was ready to pass on the knowledge just yet.

After cleaning the dirty dishes, Sakura bid her farewell. The sky was already dark, and she knew Helsa would probably choke her a little tonight, but Sakura was feeling happy and satisfied with the turn her life had taken so she was more than ready to take whatever punishment Helsa deemed necessary.

Sakura looked around and, after making sure there was no one in the vicinity, walked on the trees by coating the bottom of her feet with chakra. Soon she was jumping effortlessly from tree to tree, barely making the branches tilt under her weight. If someone was around to see it, he would've thought she was flying. This exercise was something Sakura could seldom do, considering that it had to be night and she had to be alone for her to do it, since nobody seemed able to use chakra or was even aware that jumping such long distances was possible. Sakura had even questioned Mikoto about the uses of chakra in her history and she had only given her a blank stare before asking what chakra was.

There was a very high possibility that she was the only one able to use chakra in this world, which meant that either her people were secretive and reclusive or... less likely, she wasn't from this world. But that was impossible, right? How would that be even possible after all? Out of the two choices, it was much more likely and preferable if her people, the shinobi and kunoichi, were secretive like their profession. After all, that's what they were supposed to be and do, after all. What kind of shinobi would–

Sakura skidded to a stop when she saw smoke rising from the woods in the general direction her home was. She sped up, her body almost a mirage as she ran faster than she had ever run before. The apprehension and anxiousness in her gut worsened when she saw the eager fire rising, rolling in the rooftops of their home by the wind. She immediately barged in their small wooden house, quickly locating Helsa because she was the only chakra signature in the house, however frail and fleeting.

She crouched in front of her and gathered her in her arms, lifting her as if she were weightless. "Sakura...?" Helsa murmured, before coughing harshly, throwing specks of blood in Sakura's face. With growing horror she stared at the blood dripping from Helsa's stomach, coating her fingers in red.

As much as the curiosity was killing her, she needed to get out of the burning house before they caught on fire or asphyxiated. However, there was no way any normal human could logically flee the house, so Sakura had to throw all caution to the wind and use her power as a kunoichi to get them both out of there alive. With her chakra-enhanced eyesight she picked the areas were the fire was the weakest and jumped over them. Sakura could've sworn she should've burned her legs, but instead felt the fire caress her. That was something she would have to think about later on.

Once she was far away enough of the fire, she gently set Helsa down on the grass floor. Even though she wanted to heal her as fast as she could, she needed to find a way to put the fire down before it spread to the forest and burned everything in its path. But how exactly could she do that? The only things she remembered were those innate to her person, like her chakra-enhanced strength, agility, and senses. Then again, she could do medical ninjutsu, so maybe she could to other kinds of ninjutsu?

The wind was carrying sparks of the fire further and further. The sight would've been devastatingly beautiful had Sakura not been so emotionally involved with the burning of her first home. She didn't even notice her hands making the seals until she muttered, "**_Suiton: Bakusui Shoha,_**_"_ and her mouth released a wave of water that crashed down on their home and quickly overwhelmed the flames.

Even though it had felt natural to use that ninjutsu, the amount of chakra it consumed left her winded and exhausted. She was sure out of shape to be rendered so useless after just one jutsu, which meant that she should invest in training both her mind and body more often after this.

Once she was sure the fire was fully extinguished, Sakura headed back towards Helsa with a powerful jump. She landed roughly beside her, but she was too preoccupied trying to stop the bleeding to mind that much.

"Fine," she choked. "You'll be fine, Helsa. _I promise you'll be okay, I'll promise I'll save you. I promise I won't lose you."_

Helsa placed a gentle hand above her hands after noticing the healing light was flickering out of existence. "It is okay, Sakura. I am old, and there are people I want to see on the other side... Thank you for making the last months of my life... Ah, you don't know that word. I guess happy will suffice. You are full of surprises."

"Who did this?" she asked, her voice mixed with sobs and rage as she stopped the healing ninjutsu before she became exhausted.

Helsa shook her head sadly and squeezed her fingers. "They are gone, but they don't matter, dear Sakura. Love is better motivation than hate and revenge... Remember that, because when I did it was far too late."

"I'm so sorry," Sakura muttered, holding back another cry. "_If I hadn't stopped training, if I had come home earlier, if I weren't so weak..." _Sakura stared at Helsa's unseeing eyes, knowing that she hadn't heard a word of her apology. "... _You would be alive."_

Sakura retrieved her hands from her abdomen and stared from her bloodied hands back to the open wound in her stomach, which was still bleeding freely. Someone had broken into _their _home and attacked her precious person. Though she had no idea why anyone would prey on an old woman like Helsa, the end result was still the same.

"I'm sorry," she whispered to her corpse.

But this time she didn't mean it.

* * *

She waited for half an hour besides her body, allowing her hot rage to cool down to cold bloodlust. Once she was ready, she picked Helsa's body up and ran to the ashes of their house, placing her gently there until she found a suitable burial spot.

Right now, though, she needed to find the people that took away her precious person.

Sakura didn't have much experience with tracking, and the only experience she had been counting on was the one she had forgotten. However, she was determined to not rest until she found them. Even though she had given them a thirty minute head start, she could cover that distance in less than ten minutes, so she had the advantage there.

The trick was locating their chakra, and locating chakra in the middle of a forest usually devoid of people at this time shouldn't be too hard.

And indeed, it hadn't been hard, at all. After fifteen minutes of aimlessly jumping from branch to branch she felt four chakra signatures walking leisurely away from her location, around five minutes away. She headed that way and quickly caught up to them. Once she was in their hearing range, she muffled her footsteps with chakra and came close enough to hear their conversation. She had to make sure they were the murderers, but she also wanted to know why they set their house on fire and stabbed Helsa.

"... did we get?"

"Hn, almost nothing. Bitch was empty."

Her jaw clenched, and she held back her punch.

"That was not the point," a new voice pitched in. "Fear... We want the farmlands to fear us."

"Word... people will know. Then we get money. Then... rich."

Sakura cursed her inability to speak more fluently, but by now she had a rough idea of what they were trying to say. Helsa had been the first (or at least she thought she was the first) of a series of attacks preying on the people far away from congregated human settlements. Despicable actions which led to extortion, but to get there they needed to build a reputation, and the only way to become infamous was by causing more crimes like the ones that happened today.

That was all she needed to hear.

She readied her fist with chakra and leapt down from her tree branch to land silently besides the outermost male of the band. Without leaving them a chance to notice her, she punched him squarely in the jaw, the power behind her fist so great that she ripped his head out of his neck and sent it flying to a nearby trunk. Blood sprayed from his neck, streams of blood dirtying her face and hair and the new white shirt Helsa had gifted her two days ago.

The thugs jumped and yelled in surprise, but Sakura didn't give them time to recover as she uppercutted the next man, sending his head flying to the treetops. By now Sakura was starting to enjoy the noise of cracking bones and ripped skin, and looked forward to hearing what sounds the other two murderers would make.

By now the other two were prepared, if the glint of their knives in the moonlight was of any indication. However, they were at a disadvantage since Sakura could see much better than them and she had superior reflexes. Both of them charged at her at the same time, but Sakura quickly jumped out of the way, getting behind them and punching them in the chest at the same time, feeling giddy when she heard their spinal cords snapping beneath her fists. They crumpled to the floor like puppets being cut from their strings.

In the midst of her adrenaline rush Sakura had not realized how heavily she was breathing. If there had been another shinobi around she would've been dead already. Had she been a pitiful excuse of a kunoichi in her homeland?

She started becoming more aware of the blood on her face and clothes and started cleaning her face with her stained hands, though she was surprised when she felt something cooler making its way down her cheeks.

Huh, so she had been crying all this time.

What a pitiful excuse of a kunoichi she really was.

* * *

Mikoto was the first one to hear the soft knocks on the door. She turned around to look at her husband, who was peacefully asleep after a day of tolling in the fields. Harvest day was getting closer, so she knew Erick always gave it a little bit more these days. With that thought in mind, she made her way to open the door to give Erick some more time, noting as she passed the kitchen that it was barely sunrise.

She closed her eyes in annoyance and opened the door. "I hope you know..." She gaped at Sakura, who was drenched in blood and staring at her with empty bloodshot eyes.

"I... I... _I didn't know where else to go," _she whispered.

She sounded so pitiful, so alone, so broken, that Mikoto decided to forget she was drenched in _blood _and gave her a bone-crushing hug. She stroked her hair, which was more red than pink right now, as she sobbed into her shoulder.

"I promise I... _I gave her a good burial."_

"_Shh, shh, I know you did, I know you did. I know you honored your grandmother."_

Sakura only cried harder.

* * *

_It was then that I realized that even people without a past can feel pain._

_It was then that I realized that a kunoichi could lose to death._

_It left a bitter taste in my mouth._

_A taste I would experience many more times later on._

* * *

**Jutsu used:**

**Water Release: Exploding Water Colliding Wave**

**Okay, so just to clear things up, the Naruto universe I will be using will be AU, which means that this Sakura will be AU too. That is all I will reveal for now. And yes, that AU universe will play a big role in this story, but much later on. As for Sakura's amnesia, I researched retrograde amnesia as much as I could but I had to take creative liberties to fit the story. I promise it will make sense as the plot develops.**

**Speaking of plot, this story is currently a side-project so depending on the response I receive I will put it on as a main project and start developing plot intensively or I'll just write when my muse dictates and I'm not feeling lazy.**

**Also, I wanted to try my hand at romance since I'm relatively new at that, so I'll leave the pairing up to the readers. Please keep in mind that Sakura is currently 17 so by the time the manga storyline begins she will be 24~25.**

**Reviews are love.**

**Penpal**


	2. Resolve

**Reading guide for this chapter:**

"Talk."

"_Japanese."_

_"**Emphasis.**"_

* * *

Dinner that night was a tense and quiet affair. Sakura had explained a very edited version of the events, saying that Hesla had accidentally dropped her lamp and that had consequently set the whole house on fire in a matter of seconds. Sakura got there just in time to retrieve her from the building, but she had sustained a heavy injury from a fallen piece of wood that had impaled her abdomen, killing her a few minutes later from blood loss.

She had gone through great lengths to hide the bodies of the bandits, looking for any missing appendages and then burying all of their remains very deep in the earth. She knew no one was going to miss them, considering they were relatively unknown and the only one that knew about their crime had assassinated them not even an hour later, but she still had to make sure nobody would accidentally come across their corpses, especially the decapitated ones. That would just raise unnecessary questions.

It had been a good thing that the Ackermans trusted Sakura's word. It's not that she feared their retribution, because she was sure they would say the thugs deserved what they got in a twisted way. No, she feared _their _fear. She didn't want visit their house and have them be on the edge, wandering if she was going to snap at them if they so much as playfully insulted her. She didn't want them to think of her as a cold-blooded murderer no better than the ones she had killed. She had snapped, yes, but that was because of grief and rage, not because she was a psychopath who relished in going on killing sprees.

Or had she been like that? Is that why she had found it so easy to end someone else's life, because she had done it before and felt no remorse?

The Ackermans were the only people capable of accepting her in her current state, so if she had to hide a part of her to be accepted then so be it.

Mikasa had been understandably quiet throughout the whole dinner. Though the kunoichi felt numb inside, she was still perceptive enough to notice Mikasa's determined gaze whenever they locked stares.

"Mom, can Sakura stay here, with us?"

Sakura was about to swallow her stew when she choked, coughing harshly from the surprise. Mikoto patted her on the back gently, and after a couple of gulps of water she regained her composure, much to her embarrassment.

"Now, Mikasa––" Mikoto started off gently.

However, the seven-year-old was not easily dissuaded. "She can stay in my room. She can have my bed and I can sleep in the floor, too."

"Mikasa," Sakura murmured gently, "you don't have to do that. It's okay. I can––"

"It's a big responsibility to have a roomate," Erick interrupted with an amused smile. He patted his daughter on the head. "Think you can handle it?"

Mikasa nodded eagerly, puffing out her cheeks. "I'll do it for Sakura!"

Sakura put her spoon down next to her bowl and stared helplessly at each of them, feeling her dread grow at their looks of compassion. "I... I don't know how to say––"

"Then don't." Mikoto's eyes hardened a bit and she placed her hand on top of Sakura's squeezing gently. "_I don't know what image you have of yourself, but you have been a wonderful addition to our family. It would be our greatest honor if you accepted a place in the Ackerman household. _Will you, Sakura?"

She grit her teeth and closed her eyes tightly, hoping to keep the tears at bay. Here she was, a monster, and the Ackermans were inviting her to live like one of them. She should have refused, she should have been selfless and thought about their well-being above her own, but she was selfish and, although the guilt was eating her alive, she felt elated that the Ackermans thought of her as family.

"_I humbly accept."_

Dinner that night became a relaxed and somber affair.

"Oh, Mikasa, don't worry: we'll get you a new bed."

* * *

_December 25, 842_

"_Um, Mikasa, do you need any help with that_?"

The dark-haired girl stared at her surrogate sister, slightly confused. "What do you mean?"

Sakura pointed at the logs she was carrying with a tip of her head. True, Sakura was carrying five times the amount, but she had the strength of ten men. She couldn't hide her freakish strength from the Ackermans, anyway. Mikasa, however, was a seven-year-old who was carrying fifteen pounds worth of wood in her arms and she didn't even bat an eyelash.

"_They're not heavy?"_

"No." She lifted the logs a bit higher, as if to prove a point. "Mom says I have to be strong so I am."

"_How strong do you want to be?"_

"Is that Japanese I'm hearing from you, Sakura? And why aren't you practicing your Japanese, Mikasa?"

Sakura cringed and hesitated to look ahead, knowing that Mikoto would be glaring quite openly at her. The pair of adopted sisters had an unspoken agreement to speak in the language they felt most comfortable in whenever Mikoto was out of an earshot. She had stressed to Sakura the importance of continuously practicing the language, but she had grown complacent with speaking Japanese to the younger girl, especially because Mikasa understood everything she said with ease. And Mikasa felt no interest in keeping her ancestor's tongue alive, seeing as it would be useless in a few years.

"Um... Sorry?"

Mikoto wasn't placated, though. She whacked both of them in the back of the head, making Mikasa yelp in pain and Sakura whimper in surprise.

"I expected a better excuse from you, Sakura Ackerman. Now, hurry along; those logs need to last us a couple of days and tonight."

Both girls shifted the logs slightly in their hands, the gloves protecting them from the splinters of the wood.

It had been awkward the first time the Ackermans had acknowledged her as part of the family by attaching their last name to hers. Erick had done it first, and the room had become so quiet and uncomfortable that none of them had brought it up for two weeks. The underlying tension of acceptance had immediately vanished once she introduced herself as Sakura Ackerman to one of Erick's potential costumers, unknowingly causing him to grin in happiness.

Ever since then the name had just... fit.

"_I don't want to be strong," _she whispered in response to her last question. "_I don't want to fight. I... don't want to hurt anyone."_

Sakura smiled sadly and opened the door for both of them, balancing the majority of the logs with one arm. Once inside they put the wood next to the fireplace, though Sakura stayed behind to make a new fire.

"You don't hurt people with your strength. You protect them."

"Protect?"

The fire flickered to life after a few attempts to make sparks. The room immediately felt ten degrees warmer, which was still not enough to make her feel comfortable with the weather. Apparently this winter was better than the last two years', but she still couldn't stop shivering for more than three minutes.

"Mhm," she hummed in agreement. "But you don't have to worry right now. It's something that you'll, uh... _You'll figure it out when you're older." _She pivoted on her heels and hit the firewood, causing their little stack to fall down. "Ugh, why do we even have so many?"

"Today is Christmas, so Mom and Dad want a big fire to last through the night."

"_Ah, yeah, Christmas." _She repeated the name, trying to sound it out so that her accent would eventually fade. "_What is this Christmas anyway? Everyone talks about it but I don't really know what's going on."_

"You don't know what Christmas is?" Mikasa asked, both dismayed and fascinated at the piece of information.

Sakura frowned at her tone but shook her head. It wasn't like she was missing something big, right? "_I don't remember anything, remember?" _

"Oh, sorry... I forgot. Anyway, Christmas is when you give presents to the people you love because it makes them happy. Oh, and you eat a big dinner too!"

"Why?"

Mikasa's excited face disappeared, replaced by a thoughtful frown. "Huh... I don't know. Maybe Mom knows?"

Erick opened the door, letting the chilly winter air in for a second too long. He seemed extremely proud and content, if his grin and sparkling eyes were anything to go by. He placed a package on the tabletop and unwrapped it for the girls to see.

"Mikasa, go get your mother and tell her we have a goose."

The girl bolted out in a second, yelling at the top of her lungs that they were going to have meat for Christmas. If Sakura hadn't been so astonished to begin with, she would've laughed at her antics.

"Do you know how to cook goose?"

She smiled sheepishly and shook her head. "Not too late, right?"

Erick chuckled, and Sakura had to admit his happiness was incredibly contagious. "No, it's never too late to learn how to cook goose."

Mikasa dragged Mikoto back home, only for her to wrap her arms around her husband's neck and kiss him soundly on the lips. Both girls scrunched their noses at the same time, looked at each other in disgust, and then giggled when they saw they had the exact same expression on their faces.

The rest of the evening was spent preparing dinner. They were going to have the best potatoes Erick had harvested along with some lettuce Mikoto received earlier from a friend of hers. To top it off, they were going to have their _own _piece of goose, no need to share or save it to make it last.

What Sakura figured about Christmas was that it was a day to be happy because her tummy was going to be full.

Once the table had been set, they each said something they were grateful for this year. All of the Ackermans' responses had something to do with being introduced to Sakura, which made her feel warmth on her cheeks and in her heart, and she made everyone blush in retaliation as she expressed just how grateful she was with them for taking her in as their own.

"For a wonderful year!" Mikasa cheered, and the rest of the family echoed her.

Sakura thought that they would be too occupied in eating to have an ongoing conversation, but to her pleasant surprise they couldn't stop talking or laughing about the silliest of things, and the fact that they could be so entertained about something so simple made her heart clench even tighter in what she suspected was joy. It almost felt as if she was regaining that relationship she lost with Hesla.

Hesla... The name still made her unbearably sad, but having the Ackermans around made her much stronger than before.

"Presents!" Mikasa exclaimed when Erick returned from their room. In one hand he had a doll, which he gave to an unstoppable Mikasa, and in the other hand he had a piece of rolled paper, which he gave to Mikoto. Sakura had to admit that the moment she didn't receive a present, a brief flash of hurt passed through her mind, but she quickly squashed it; they had accepted her into their family and she was feeling petty that they didn't give her a Christmas present?

What a wimp.

"Sakura."

She blinked in surprise and turned towards Mikoto, who was now standing next to her.

"I never saw them... But my grandmother always described them in her stories so I tried remembering every single detail and made this for you. Merry Christmas."

She took the paper and gently unrolled it, feeling her chest become heavy and her eyes water when she saw the most beautiful cherry blossom drawing she had ever seen. She didn't ––_couldn't_–– remember ever seeing one, but a deep part of her mind recognized it and she knew it was beautiful. Even though the drawing was done completely in black ink, she couldn't help but appreciate the art style that reminded her so much of a home she didn't have memories of.

"_This is the most beautiful thing I have seen in my life_," Sakura murmured appreciatively, running her fingers down the kanji lines. She looked up to survey the family, unsurprised to see the tenderness in their faces. "Thank you so much."

Whatever Mikoto was about to say was interrupted by an unrelenting Mikasa, who begged Sakura to play with her dolls, to which she had to excuse herself from the dinner, much to Erick and Mikoto's amusement. Sakura thought that the younger girl had a burst of energy, but ten minutes later she was peacefully asleep in her arms, clutching the doll that suspiciously looked like Sakura, sans pink hair, close to her chest.

Any other day Sakura would have placed Mikasa in her own bed, but today the night was cold, and maybe she wanted to share the warmth Christmas brought her.

* * *

_February 10, 843_

Beinn was bustling with a bit more liveliness than usual. They were safe within the walls, the safe people spent more money, merchants earned more money and spent it on other things... Overall, the economy was good, and it was particularly good for Erick's produce stall, which had earned quite the reputation that extended almost thirty kilometers, well over two towns.

Sometimes people even sought them at their home, hoping to buy any leftover vegetables, even if it meant paying more for it.

Erick had quickly noticed that Sakura had a knack for selling. To begin with, she was very pretty and had exotic looks, which always attracted the attention of the crowd, especially travelers. After that she baited the prey ––_ahem, _customer–– her gentle voice and bright green eyes forced them to look for something to buy, whether it was to linger in the stall or to appease the girl. It certainly helped that her accent was endearing, which made people want to talk to her even more, which in turn built a strong loyalty. To top it off, whenever she encountered cunning customers, Sakura would put them in place with a no-nonsense face and snappy voice which even scared Erick himself.

He had once sheepishly admitted to her that he brought her as often as he did to Beinn because he always seemed to make more money whenever she was present. He had feared she would be hurt about his confession, but she only laughed, saying that she was more than happy to do anything that would make the stall more successful and even asking in a sly voice what they could do to earn more money.

To say he was proud was an understatement.

"Thank you for your purchase!" She handed over the paper bag containing around two pounds of barley, her biggest sale of the day for now.

The woman took the bag gently and grinned widely at her. "It's so nice having you around, Sakura. It was about time that father of yours admitted that you're better than him and let you come every day."

Erick wanted to glare at the woman, but he knew that she had just paid them handsomely so he only chuckled and patted Sakura on the head. "Oh, please, Mrs Berdine, she learned it from me."

Sakura playfully shooed his hand from her head and shot him a mock glare. "Yeah, right. Thank you for seeing the truth!"

Berdine chuckled and left with a wave, leaving the duo standing there in the chilly cold under the warmth of the sun. Sakura took a seat behind the stall and next to their cart, and noted with satisfaction that there was a big dent there. Maybe they would finish earlier than usual, even.

"So, what are we getting Mikasa?"

"You mean, what are _**you **_getting for Mikasa?"

"_What?"_

"That means where, right?"

Sakura blushed. "Ah, no, it means what. But why me?"

"Well, Mikoto and I always take turns getting Mikasa's present, but I think she would appreciate it if you gave it to her."

The kunoichi bit the inside of her cheek, deep in thought. It made sense to give her the task of choosing Mikasa's present. She hadn't seen her the whole day, since Erick always woke her up before sunrise to get to Beinn early, but she knew she would be expecting her present.

"Okay, I think I can do it."

Erick chuckled and patted her twice on the back. "Good! Now, leave the stall to me and go find a present for her. Here's the money."

He gave her a small bag which weighed little, but she knew that the amount of gold inside was more than what they usually spent on a single thing. Sakura stood up from her seat, removing the imaginary dust from her long yellow skirt, and left Erick to his own devices.

Even though there was a wealth of options, the street felt _empty_. Finding Mikasa a present should've been easy ––the girl was a doll maniac after all–– but for some reason she couldn't come up with a suitable idea. She wasn't going to give her another doll because she already had five. A book would be a boring present, and she was sure she wouldn't appreciate clothes because Mikasa wouldn't be able to play with them.

Her mind was quickly coming up with different birthday present ideas and almost discarding them immediately, but she still was aware enough to turn her attention to something that caught her eye. It was a beautiful wooden doll house, with three rows and three columns of rooms, and the roof was a sight to behold, with expertly painted lines and colors. The house was devoid of furniture, but Sakura could make her something as time went by.

She entered the store and immediately went to the person behind the counter. He was an older man with kind blue eyes and a thick mustache. Perhaps Sakura would be able to manipulate him into giving her a discount? She wasn't sure the ten gold coins she had with her would suffice to buy that beautiful house.

"Excuse me, sir, how much for the house?" Her voice was polite and warm, the one she had perfected with months of experience, and she pointed with a graceful finger at the house displayed in the window.

"Ah, for you, my dear Sakura, I am willing to sell it for twenty!"

Sakura internally cringed. There was no way she was going to be able to lower the price by ten coins. She looked around the store, trying to find any other woodwork that was pretty enough but much cheaper. "Um, is there something in the ten range?"

The man gave a thoughtful frown and eyed his store.

She almost smacked her head when she remembered she had fifteen gold coins she had saved up because she wanted to buy a new blouse. Well, she could always buy clothes another day, but Mikasa's birthday was today until the next year. "Oh, sorry, I do have the money. Here."

"Eighteen would be fine," the man said in a kindly voice.

Sakura beamed in pleasure and handed over the rest of the money, feeling proud with her purchase. She promised him the best potatoes from the next harvest, to which he only laughed and said he was looking forward to them. The store owner offered to help her carry the house, but Sakura denied his offer with a secretive smile.

She decided to take a shortcut, since the sun would soon start to set and Erick hated pulling their cart at night, saying that rocks were much harder to spot without light. Besides, even though the house weighed virtually nothing compared to what she could carry, it still felt a bit awkward carrying it around the streets.

The kunoichi skidded to a stop when she passed by the blacksmith. Even though people preferred shotguns and gunpowder to kill each other, those were weapons only the military and rich could afford. The rest of the populace relied on steel and arrows to protect themselves. Erick had a shotgun, but he seldom used it, claiming that he couldn't load it quickly enough.

She still remembered the conversation they had on Christmas, where she asked Mikasa why she was strong. If she gave her a means to protect herself and others, would she agree in training herself?

"What are you doing here?"

Sakura blinked, surprised to find herself inside the forge, because was this place _loud_. She had to admit she wouldn't mind working there in the cold months of winter, but it must be a bitch to be there hammering steel in the middle of summer. "I'm looking for a dagger."

The bald man grunted and pointed at the rows of daggers with a disinterested wave. Sakura held back a huff of annoyance and made her way to the daggers. She gingerly placed the house down, careful to not get any scratches or dirt on it, and eyed the weapons. Most of them were beautiful and well-made, but she only had seven gold coins to spend, which meant she had to go for the cheaper looking ones. Not that it really mattered, since this was Mikasa's first weapon and people usually received shitty first things.

She picked a simple dagger from a cluttered mess and unsheathed it. The steel was dull, but the edges were sharp enough to make her bleed slightly when she ran a fingertip along the edge.

"How much for this one?"

The blacksmith stopped hammering, and Sakura sighed softly in relief; that noise was making her head throb. "Five," he answered quickly and turned to go back to work.

Sakura frowned. That was a bit overpriced considering this was probably a failed dagger he hadn't even considered to sell. "The steel is not very pure, the edges are not that smooth, and the hilt could have been better. I'll give you three."

He grunted in annoyance but nodded slightly, accepting her terms. She smirked to herself in satisfaction, handed him the money, gathered her purchases, and left the small, loud forge without a parting glance.

Now the sun had really began to set, so she shouldn't have been surprised to meet an agitated Erick.

"Where were you all this time?"

"Buying Mikasa's present."

"It's late."

"I bought her a doll house and a dagger."

Erick stopped walking immediately, and the cart he carried on his back came to a full stop.

"Hm, maybe we should buy a horse to carry this one day," she thought out loud.

"You bought her a what?"

Sakura squirmed, a bit uncomfortable to hear such an edgy voice from Erick. "She's eight now, and the world is... is cruel. She should learn how to fight early to protect herself."

"And you know how to fight?" he asked, a suspicious and unbelieving but at least he didn't seem to oppose the idea so much.

"Of course."

"When did you learn?"

She frowned. "I don't know. I just woke up that day and knew how to fight, knew how to move."

"Oh," Erick exhaled softly. It was no secret that Sakura was a bit sensitive about her amnesia. It was something that frustrated endlessly, knowing things but not knowing _how _she knew them, and the Ackermans knew that they should leave the topic be lest they add unnecessary grief to the girl.

The topic of her hair was open, though. It wasn't a normal week unless someone made a joke at the expense of her pink hair, much to her annoyance. Still, she must like her hair, because she had not cut it once and it now reached her mid-back.

"Do I have your permission?"

"Only if Mikasa agrees."

The rest of their walk home was silent except when Erick whispered a curse after bumping into a small rock. Sakura was just anxious to give her gifts to Mikasa, knowing she would appreciate them immensely.

Their small house came into view and both of them unconsciously sped up, eager to get back home. They must've been loud, because the door opened and Mikasa bolted right at them, laughing and asking about their day and telling them how great hers was in one big sentence.

"Whoa, Mikasa, slow down," Sakura said with a chuckle. She crouched –– she was not so small anymore and her head towered over her–– and handed the doll house to her, inwardly relieved that she had enough sense to hide the dagger in her right hip. "Happy Birthday, Mikasa."

The girl stared at the wooden house with such reverence that it almost made Sakura laugh, _almost_. She took her gift somberly and clutched it to her chest. "This is amazing. Thank you, Sakura! Thank you, Papa!" She whirled around, running inside the house and yelling her thanks to her mother.

"By the way, how much did that house cost?"

"Ten," she replied without missing a beat.

* * *

_June 20, 843_

Mikasa aimed a punch at her right shoulder, but Sakura quickly side-stepped to the left to avoid being hit. She then made a low kick, and Sakura was about to simply jump, but she noticed the muscles in her left arm preparing to throw a punch, so she did a backflip and regained her balance almost immediately, putting herself out of harm's way without breaking a sweat.

Her pupil, on the other hand, was huffing and greedily gulping any air she could take. With a groan, she dropped down to the grass floor, exhausted.

"Why won't you... let me hit you?" she asked in between pants.

Sakura took a seat besides her, tucking a strand of her dark hair behind her ear. She really needed to make better ponytails. "Because I don't want to get hurt. Besides, the day you hit me is the day this is over, remember?"

"You made it sound so easy when you first offered this."

She grinned, recalling the look of smugness in Mikasa's face the first day of their lesson. Sakura had declared that the only thing Mikasa needed to do was land one hit, _one_, and the training would be over. She dodged her punches with ease and pointed out problems in her stance, counting the number of times she would be dead if this were a real fight.

The count had never come below thirty.

"I know, but you'll get it, eventually. Maybe in a couple of years seeing how good you are."

"_Years_? I'll be like, ten or twelve or thirteen! I don't––" Her rant came to a stop, and her frustrated face was replaced by a thoughtful frown. "When's your birthday?"

Sakura smiled sadly. "I don't remember."

Mikasa stood up and crossed her arms. "That's no good. If you don't have a birthday, you can't receive presents, right?"

"No," she replied slowly, unsure as to where her train of thought was going.

"Then today is your birthday, and you are... Hm, you're old, so you're seventeen starting today."

"Why today? And why seventeen?"

"Why not today? And what's wrong with being seventeen?"

Sakura puffed her cheeks out. "There's nothing wrong with them," she eventually said. "It's just a bit sudden... I never really cared about those things."

"Well, I do. So today, June 20, is your birthday. Happy Birthday, Sakura!"

She had half a mind to protest, but looking down at her excited gray orbs she couldn't help but give in to this little girl who, though sometimes bossy, was only looking out for her, even if she was about a decade older than her.

"Thank you, Mikasa. This will be the best––"

"Mikasa! Sakura! Come back! Doctor Jaeger is here to check on you two!"

The black-haired girl groaned and sat up, a lethargic look on her face. Sakura chuckled and stood up, offering her a helping hand, which she gladly took.

She thought Mikasa was going to challenge her to a race back home, but she did no such thing. She must be in no hurry to go back, considering the doctor was here for their yearly check up. She said that Doctor Jaeger did weird things, like putting a thing above her heart and listening in, checking her ears and mouth, asking if she felt something funny in her stomach, and she never liked it.

Sakura knew that he was just following a strict diagnosis protocol, something that she felt she had done countless of times, even though she didn't quite remember what. Maybe this Doctor Jaeger would serve to clear up a bit of her memory?

They entered their home with opposite expressions, but Mikasa's look of irritation quickly downspiraled into a grimace once she spotted the tools the doctor brought with him.

"Doctor Jaeger said the checkup will be short, okay? Now be a good girl and let him make sure you're healthy."

Her younger sister followed almost immediately, completing all of the doctor's requests without a single complaint. The doctor seemed to pick up on this, because he hurried through the tests, much to Sakura's amusement. In less than five minutes Mikasa was up and going, leaving the doctor without a parting glance.

"And is this the new addition to your family, Miss Mikoto?"

"Ah, yes, Doctor Jaeger, this is Sakura."

He beckoned her to sit on the chair next to his and started doing his routine checkup. "Now, I don't know if you're aware, but we've met before. Well, **_I _**met you."

"Huh?"

"Did Helsa not tell you?"

Sakura felt a lump on her throat, which she roughly swallowed. "She died," she said quietly.

The doctor's green eyes widened and then grew sad. "Ah, I'm sorry, dear, I didn't know that. I was friends with Helsa's husband... They were good people." Neither Mikoto nor Sakura said anything, opting to focus on the doctor's procedure. He cleared his throat, aware that he had brought forth a tense silence. "Anyway, I was the one that tended your wounds around a year ago. Which begs the question, just what did you do?"

"I have amnesia. I don't really remember anything before the day Helsa found me."

"No memories? That is a bit strange. I've had a few cases concerning amnesia. Most of them are from the military, and most of them dealt with a hard hit on the head, but all of them regained their memories in around a year or two."

Sakura shifted in her seat. What if she didn't remember, ever? What if she didn't find who she was or returned to her homeland? Yes, she was more than happy with the Ackermans, but she still felt as if she didn't truly belong, whether it was because they spoke different native tongues or the fact that she was a med-nin, trained to both kill and save lives, and most of the people here weren't even aware they possessed chakra.

"Don't worry, I'm sure you'll remember. It's just a matter of patience and not forcing things. Besides, I am quite curious to meet your parents, because I must ask just how did _pink _hair come to your family?"

Both Mikoto and Doctor Jaeger laughed, and Sakura only chuckled nervously and scratched the back of her neck in embarrassment.

"Oh, yes, I forgot to ask you a favor."

"What can I do for you?"

"Could you please register Sakura? I'm afraid the nearest center is a few hours away and I was under the impression that––"

The doctor raised a hand, stopping the rambling woman on her tracks. "There is no need to explain yourself, Miss Mikoto. It would be my pleasure." He got out a sheet of paper, quill, and bottled ink from his briefcase and placed it on the table. "So, Miss Sakura, what will be your full name?"

"Sakura Ackerman."

He scribbled her name on the paper with the land's alphabet. "Hm... Since we don't know your birth parents I'll put down the Ackermans' names. Is that okay?"

"Yes," Mikoto and Sakura replied in unison.

Doctor Jaeger nodded absentmindedly and jotted down more notes. "And date of birth?"

"June 20, 826."

Sakura noticed Mikoto's shocked face out of the corner of her eye, but she feigned attention on the doctor, who had an eyebrow raised but continued writing. "Oh, happy birthday then, Sakura."

"Thank you."

* * *

_April 4, 844_

"Ah, you brought potatoes today. That's good."

Sakura nodded and smiled widely. "We had a bit extra from yesterday. I'm still a bit new at inventory."

Berdine gave her a reproachful look. "You just started this, my dear. It takes a while to get used to doing this alone. I think you're doing a spectacular work."

Before she would blush at the compliment, but she was so used to being treated nicely by the townspeople that she only widened her smile a bit more until she was showing a bit of her pearly teeth. "I think it's a good think, though. Erick gets to tend the crops and make sure they're higher quality and I sell them."

"And how long have you been doing this?"

"Around a month or two?"

The woman laughed, the sound high and piercing. "Oh, dear, if you only saw the first months of Erick's arrival you would've died of laughter."

"That bad?"

"He was a young husband and his wife was expecting. That made him a bit clumsier than usual, for sure. But you received prior training, so maybe I'm being a bit unfair to poor Erick."

The day, which had been bright until now, darkened almost immediately. Both Berdine and Sakura looked up to see a huge gray cloud covering the sun. By the direction of the wind, it seemed to be heading in the direction of her home, something which made Sakura sigh in annoyance.

"Oh, my, it's going to rain a lot today, won't it?"

"It will... Too bad I can't leave just yet."

"Why is that?"

Sakura beckoned the cart full of food with a disinterested wave. "It's too full. Erick won't be happy with that."

"I'm sure he'll understand it if he saw how awful the weather is going to be. Nobody will be out in the streets anyway."

"You're right, maybe––"

"Excuse me!" a haggard woman interrupted. Sakura would have shot her a withering glare had her eyes not looked so crazed and desperate. "Has anyone seen my son, Anton? He is this tall, has dark brown hair, has a scar on his cheek? Have you seen him? He was playing in the woods. Please."

Berdine looked at the woman sadly and only shook her head. She excused herself from the conversation, leaving Sakura by her lonesome with the worried mother. "I'm sorry, Miss, but no, I haven't seen him." The woman became even more despondent, and the sight only tugged at her heartstrings. Who knew how worried she would be if Mikasa got lost? She wanted to help... And perhaps she was the only able to help at this moment. But could she afford it?

Well, she was leaving early anyway, might as well do a good deed while she was at it.

"But I can help you find him."

The woman's eyes lit with hope. "You can?"

Sakura nodded resolutely.

She reached out and grabbed both of her hands, moving them up in down in unrestrained gratitude. "Thank you so much, Miss! Is there something you want me to do to help?"

"Yes. Please stay here and look after my stall? I don't know how long I'll be gone, but just in case."

"Oh, of course, my dear. Anything you say."

"What part exactly do you think he is in?"

"He likes to play in the east side, but he usually comes back before noon. Maybe he got lost?"

That was a possibility, but it sounded too good to be true. "Okay, I'll start there. Please wait here."

Sakura ran down the mostly empty streets at the speed of a normal human, but once she was a long ways inside the woods with no one around, she sped up to inhuman speeds with her chakra and jumped up to the tree tops, scanning the area for any signs of chakra.

She was about ready to give up in her pursuits after half an hour when she sensed a very small chakra signature, possibly a child's. She grinned in triumph and headed that way, mindful to get out of the treetops and lower her speed once she was close by.

The pink-haired girl reached a small clearing and stood very still. At such close distances, it was impossible to exactly pinpoint the source of the chakra because every living thing had chakra in them. Usually humans had chakra spikes to them, but the signature had stopped being dynamic almost ten minutes ago, meaning the person was asleep or, worse, dead.

Her sensitive hearing caught soft breaths and she tiptoed towards the sound, which came from behind a big tree. She wanted to be annoyed, she really did, but she couldn't help but gush over the sleeping boy who clutched a black cat that appeared completely unamused about the scenario.

"_Aw, this is so cute_," she whispered in her native tongue and gathered the sleeping boy in her arms. The cat scrambled away once it was freed, but it stayed close to the pair, hinting that it was attached to the boy, regardless of its annoyance. "_If you want to stay with us you better keep up."_

She shot up and started leaping from tree to tree, though much slower and gentler than before so as to not wake her sleeping companion. When she was close to the forest's entrance she dove down and landed lightly on her feet, unsurprised to see the black cat next to her, licking its paws.

"_Hn, show off."_

Getting back to her stall only took ten more minutes, and the boy was still fast asleep. Anton only woke up once he heard the relieved cries of her mother, which soon became a yelling session as she demanded why he had run off and promising a world of pain once they came back home. Sakura awkwardly stood by, waiting for them to leave the stall, and only smiled slightly when the mother turned to her.

"Oh, thank you so much, Miss! We're new here, but I know where I'll be buying my vegetables for the rest of my life!" Well, at least she got a new, lifetime customer out of the deal. "Now come on, Anton, and you two, Blacky. Both of you are in a world of trouble."

The cat meowed, as if it understood what was going on, and followed after the pair, moving its tail left and right lethargically. The boy sneaked a look backwards and waved at her, offering her a mischievous grin, before his mother grabbed him by his ear and dragged him away.

Blacky? With a name like that, Sakura didn't blame it for trying to run away with Anton.

Sakura sighed and emptied the stall, storing the small amount of leftovers in the cart. She heard a strike of thunder in the west, in the vicinity of her home, and sighed when she realized it was probably raining already.

So much for not getting wet.

After an hour of dragging the cart in the mud and rain, Sakura saw her home in the distance. Sakura frowned when she felt no chakra signatures inside, but maybe they had gone to town to meet up with Doctor Jaeger without her knowledge. Still, the idea behind a warm bath and hot soup was so tantalizing that she sped her pace to a jog. She dropped the cart off under the small, extended roof where they stored all their farm tools and rushed to the front door.

She opened the door and looked down.

Sakura choked back a scream and fell down, landing on her bottom. She desperately slid away from Mikoto's unseeing corpse and the pool of her blood and tried to look anywhere but there but only felt something inside of her break once her back hit something soft.

She didn't want to turn, she didn't want to see, but the blood pooling coating her fingers was enough evidence for what she would see. Still, she jerked her head back and almost vomited when she saw Erick staring back at her, a bleeding hole in his chest.

Sakura messily got up, only for her knees to buckle and give away beneath her. She stretched out her arms to break her fall, but she scraped her palms, yet she didn't feel any pain at all. She was numb. So cold.

"_Mikasa_," she whispered in growing horror.

With new determination she got up and frantically searched every corner of the house only to find nobody. She didn't know whether to be relieved or anguished to not find her, because that meant she was alive, but that also meant she could be wishing to be dead instead.

She let out a shrill scream and started thrashing the Mikoto and Erick's. Her control on her strength snapped and she was soon smashing walls and breaking furniture. "_Why is it that when I find happiness, someone takes it away!" _she yelled in between punches and kicks. "_Why is it that after I do something good for others, something horrible happens to me!"_

The raging girl stopped after she ripped the skin from her knuckles, the pain acting as her anchor to the real world for now. She eyed the room with a wary eye, or at least what was left of the room, and only shook her head in dismay, knowing that whatever she did would change nothing.

Sakura left the room and headed back to the dining table that doubled as kitchen as well. She stared at the unmoving bodies of her foster parents and teared up again, though she did not sob or shake or grimace. "_I will find Mikasa and kill whoever did this to us. I promise there will be blood and pain for this."_

She went back to her room and ripped out her dirty skirt and shirt and changed into the old pants and long-sleeved shirt she had woken up in this world with.

Sakura went back to the woods and immediately took off, uncaring if someone saw her. She needed to find Mikasa as quickly as possible, and that meant she would have to give no shits about the status of her secret.

The rain made it impossible to track by scent, so that meant she would have to track Mikasa by her chakra signature. Luckily for her, she could detect her around a kilometer away, so she only had to close enough and she should be as clear as day.

She felt herself grow weak once she recognized Mikasa's chakra close to her, however it was surrounded by two others. She steeled herself to fight, coating her fists with enough chakra to rip a person apart, and sped up until she reached a small cabin with a lake in the background.

Sakura spotted her almost immediately but had to hold back her speed when she saw she was surrounded by Doctor Jaeger and an unknown boy. They were talking to her, but they immediately cleared the way when they heard her coming.

She dropped to her knees in front of Mikasa and hugged her tightly meanwhile she checked for injuries. She let her go slightly and unwrapped that red scarf from her head and surveyed her face, her anger churning deeply when she saw the blotches of blood in her pretty features. "Are you alright?"

Mikasa's eyes were empty, and that sight alone was enough to break her heart all over again. "Yes, Eren saved me."

The kunoichi let her foster sister go completely and she stood up, almost immediately noticing the young boy. He was around Mikasa's age, but those eyes of his burned with the determination and hate of an older man. "How did you save my sister?"

"I killed them. I killed the ones who did this to you."

Sakura wanted to feel grateful towards the boy, she really did, and in hindsight maybe there was some affection towards buried deep, but at the moment she was resentful that this nine-year-old boy had taken away revenge from her forever.

Perhaps it was for the best. That monster she had become around a year ago wasn't one she wanted to be again.

"I killed one too."

Her body froze, and she pivoted her torso slowly towards Mikasa, though she didn't look at her in the eye. "Did you do it to protect?"

She nodded absentmindedly.

"She protected me," Eren offered as an explanation.

Sakura managed a small smile and patted both children on the head. "It's good to protect each other."

Doctor Jaeger cleared his throat, drawing the attention back to him. "Ah, Sakura, I am deeply sorry about what happened. I was... talking to Mikasa about her future, and I offered both of you a place in my home. Would you like that?"

There was no way she would be able to return to that home again, not after what had happened, so she had absolutely no qualms in accepting. However, she felt a sense of nostalgia with this offer, because she was back at where she started not even two years ago.

She only hoped the ending wouldn't be the same.

* * *

**Okay, to clear something that may or may not have been explained fully. Sakura's real birthday is March 28, and as of the last entry she is really nineteen, but in the SnK world she is legally seventeen, few months short of being eighteen. Considering how short she is, it wouldn't be that big of a stretch to say she is a year younger.**

**Good news is the story has become such a plot bunny mine that I have decided to focus my attention with it. Plot planning is almost over, and that brings me to my next news, though I don't know if it is good or bad: pacing. Maybe you already noticed, but I reaaally love to develop characters, even those that didn't get much screen time. Thus the romance, which will happen with an unknown character eventually, will be slow building. Sloowww. So I wouldn't expect Sakura to fall in love with anyone anytime soon, especially after the traumatic experiences she has been, and will be, through. Yay for trauma.**

**Also, my most sincerest thanks to asredwer, Bum reviews, Latin Gardenia, foraslanthelion, pepergirl001, Atsirk Enoh, brokenmaelstrom, Guest, Ace Clover, deedee2034, and JellyBean for being super awesome and leaving reviews that made me think long enough on where I want to take this story. Also, thank you to everyone who favorited and added this story to their alerts!**

**Reviews are motivation!**

**Penpal**


	3. Surviving

**Reading guide for this chapter:**

"Talk."

"_Japanese."_

_"**Emphasis."**_

* * *

Sunrises in Shiganshina were always bright and warm. Not only that, but the air was crisp, refreshing, whether it was because the people kept their district clean or because they were so close to Wall Maria that the freshness of the outside seeped in, allowing for a taste of the wilderness without ever leaving the safety of the walls.

It was in the mornings that Sakura found the time to train Eren, Mikasa, and, quite recently, their blond friend Armin. She had heard a few weeks after the _incident_ on how Mikasa had frozen before landing the kill, and Sakura couldn't help but feel slightly guilty, because if she had been a bit harsher during her training, maybe Mikasa wouldn't have ever been in that position to begin with.

Eren had jumped at the opportunity to learn taijutsu, claiming that he would need it once he enlisted for the army. Convincing Kalura had been a grueling task, but now there Eren was in their practice field, waiting for her with an excited grin. Mikasa was standing next to him, staring at the wall that divided them from the outside world, seemingly brooding.

She frowned but paid it no mind, used to Mikasa's absentmindedness. Sometimes she had half a mind to ask her what she thought about in these moments, but almost immediately decided against it. It's not like she needed to ask, because she probably mused about the same things Sakura did whenever nobody was looking.

"Good morning, Sakura!"

Said girl only raised a pink eyebrow. "Well, aren't you the ray of sunshine today. What's got in to you?"

An innocent expression crossed his face, and Sakura mentally prepared herself for anything. "Nothing! Nothing! I'm just excited to see you."

"Eren, you're scaring her."

"Damn right he is. Stop being enthusiastic and act half asleep."

"But you'll beat me if I do that."

Sakura restrained the groan that threatened to escape her throat. Arguing with Eren was like arguing with a titan: impossible because they were incapable of understanding. "Anyway, where's Armin?"

"Probably asleep," Mikasa quietly supplied.

Well, it was very early in the morning, and didn't Armin help out in his family's bakery? Sakura shrugged and clapped her hands. "Maybe he'll show up later. Let's start."

"That's not fair," he whispered, and since it was only because of Sakura's sensitive hearing that she caught his sentence, she decided to let it slide.

The ten-year-old boy then pouted, wondering why Sakura was so slack with Armin's attendance when in contrast she would drop a bucket of water on his head if he was so much as a minute late. If he wasn't being so petulant, he would've realized that Armin had been forced to come to these training sessions by Eren himself, not out of his own volition, and maybe Sakura was a bit more perceptive than most people gave her credit for and she was respected Armin's wishes.

"Remember, if either of you lands a hit on me I'll teach both of you how to combine a low and high kick smoothly and _maybe_ I'll teach you how to do a body throw from a choke hold."

Eren looked as if he was ready to burst and even Mikasa had a small smile on her face.

Sakura didn't have a trademark pose, since she realized in a real fight she wouldn't even be able to have enough time to attempt it. Instead, she relaxed her legs and shoulders, so that whatever attack either one of her pupils threw at her, she would be ready to adapt and evade.

Mikasa was the first one to attack, throwing a punch aimed at her abdomen and preparing the other leg to to sweep her legs and make her lose her balance. Eren snapped out of his stupor in a second, going for more powerful strike to her face, lacking the finesse of his adopted sister. Sakura pivoted her body ninety degrees to avoid the punch, causing Mikasa to lose the opportunity to use her legs momentarily, and bent her back slightly to avoid the fist to her face.

When they first started these sessions in Shiganshina, Sakura had refrained from retaliating, claiming that they were too young to be on the receiving end of her hits. However, they had grown overconfident, attacking in the most outrageous and dangerous ways that would get them killed if it had been a real fight. Thus Sakura had decided that it would be a good idea to hit back only when their move was too unbelievable or simply wrong. It was a win-win, because the kids no longer screwed up as often, and Sakura had learned to control her freakish strength to the point that she could hit her pupils without breaking their bones. Sure, she used the strength a normal human would use to flick a baby, but at least her secret was safe.

If she had feared the Ackermans reaction about her status as a kunoichi, she was horrified at the idea of the Jaegers finding out about it, or anyone in Shiganshina for that matter. People were very close-minded about different things, especially the citizens of this district, since they were the closest to the titans. Anything that wasn't human, anything that wasn't _normal_, was an enemy of mankind, and even though Sakura felt pretty human most of the time, she couldn't deny that there were moments that she knew she could turn into these people's worst nightmare.

So maybe it was for the best if she kept her powers hidden in her closet.

She had been so lost in her thoughts that she miscalculated the amount of distance she had to put between Mikasa and her punch, and part of her pinkie's knuckles grazed her shoulder. It was fleeting, it was light, but it was there.

Mikasa must've felt it too, because her gray eyes widened and she immediately stepped back after finish going through her attack. Eren, still lost in his adrenaline, aimed a punch at her collarbone, which she stopped with the palm of her hand. Eren stared at her, wide-eyed, because she had never halted any of his attacks, but she smiled gently at him.

"You both passed."

The boy grinned and high-fived Mikasa, who was sporting a rare grin. If she smiled like that after grazing her shoulder maybe Sakura should let her win more often. Eren started laughing and boasting about how easy the fight had been, asking every once in a while, "Right, Mikasa?" to which she only giggled and nodded along.

Sakura frowned and hit him in the back of the head. "Alright, brat, first of all it was Mikasa that landed the hit, not you. So if anyone has the right to dance like a monkey like you're doing, then it's her."

Eren pouted and Mikasa only smiled even wider. "So when do we learn this body throw?"

"Tomorrow."

"Tomorrow? But why?" he exclaimed, dismayed. Even Mikasa looked a bit crestfallen.

"You have work to do, and I have to do a couple of rounds with your father today."

Not only had Grisha Jaeger taken both her and Mikasa as his daughters, he had also taken Sakura as his pupil. It started when Sakura nursed a delusional Kalura back to health when he was out in the inland, and ever since then they hadn't looked back. He taught her all he knew about medicines and herbs from this world, and Sakura greedily took it all in, aware that she would not be able to expel infections with her medical ninjutsu all the time like she had done with Kalura.

Sometimes she wanted to reveal her secret to Grisha. When there was a need for a surgery, but they couldn't perform it because of the environment, Sakura wanted to step in and take the spotlight, saving both the child and mother and giving that man his leg back and extending the life of that grandmother who wished to see her grandson marry. It was something that had been ingrained in her head, to try her best to save a patient, but for some reason she couldn't come out and do it, because she knew that if she showed people the almost magical way she healed, they would never leave her alone.

They would shower her with both attention and work, gifts and demands, until the situation became too much and she would have to choose who to save, because time both her time and chakra were limited. Then people would curse her and despise her for not saving that wife and firstborn son, for letting that brave Survey Corps soldier who lost his limb die of blood loss, for denying that dying grandmother her wish to see her granddaughter marry the man of her dreams...

So no, she didn't want that life.

Maybe she was selfish like that.

Eren groaned but he knew he couldn't complain. What Sakura was saying was very true and not an excuse. Mikasa didn't mind, because she knew firsthand how important promises were to Sakura, but she didn't feel in the mood to deal with an impatient Eren today.

"Be good and don't get in trouble today, alright?"

And with that Sakura left her two adopted siblings in the field. Even though she was still dressed in her training clothing and indecent for most people, she was supposed to meet with Grisha in front of the Arlert's bakery. From there they were going to check on a girl's fever, an old man's cold, and, if time permitted, they would go visit the apothecary to see if they had the medicine to cure one of rapidly-spreading diseases in the mainland.

"We're also going to have lunch at home," the doctor said as an afterthought.

Sakura nodded, glad to see they were on the same page in the matter of food. "Good, because those two gave me a bit of trouble today."

"Oh, that Eren, always searching for trouble. I'm really grateful for watching out for them, Sakura. You didn't have to do that."

"Those two are special. It honestly is something I enjoy doing."

The two continued their walk on silence, which was only broken when they reached their first destination and greeted the mother of the feverish girl. She thanked both of them, because ever since they had given her daughter those herbs, her fever had dropped considerably and she was no longer delusional. Still, Grisha asked Sakura to complete a diagnosis and nodded in agreement when her conclusions matched his. The doctor told the mother to keep giving her the medicine for two more days and she would be good to go.

After politely refusing breakfast, the two headed to the old man's home, only to be greeted by his son. The young man let them know that his stubborn father went out to the fields today, even after being reminded that he was sick. Sakura sighed and shook her head, amazed at the pigheadedness of some patients, but Grisha had a better control on his professionalism. With a tired look he told the son to keep giving his father the medicine for five more days and then he would come back to check on him.

Since that visit had taken considerably shorter than what either of them expected, they headed down to the apothecary. Grisha had noticed in his last time that there was a new type of cold prevalent in the inlands and had asked the apothecary to conjure different types of medicine, which Grisha would use on different patients and see which one would work.

"This is one of the ways I stopped that disease a few years ago," he had confessed a couple of days ago.

Grisha entered the apothecary first and almost immediately started exchanging pleasantries with the man.

"Louis! It has been far too long!"

"That it has, that it has. Oh, hello there, Sakura! Doing some rounds with this old man here?"

"He needs someone to carry around his stuff. That bag is apparently too heavy for him now."

Louis guffawed and even Grisha chuckled, which was quite the accomplishment considering he was a very serious man. "Ah, yes, thank you for reminding me, Sakura. Anyway, Louis, you have something for me, as I recall."

The frail old man nodded, his long white hair following his movements, and retrieved five small bottles from behind the counter. "I made all of them with the idea of stopping the symptoms you mentioned, but I'm not sure if I got the right combination. When you come back we can tweak the composition."

Grisha nodded gravely and carefully put the five bottles inside his black case, not bothering to remove the cork and smell the medicine Louis had made. "Yes, I'll tell you about my findings in three days."

"Oh, you're leaving already?"

"Yes, I actually have a ship to catch in an hour."

"Oh, yes, yes, of course. Please don't let me keep you waiting. Have a good trip, Grisha."

"Thank you, Louis, I'll see you later."

"Good bye, Mr. Louis." Sakura bowed her head slightly and almost turned to catch up with the doctor when Louis called her back.

"Make sure to drop by tomorrow at one. I am helping with a birth at four, and you wanted to see one, right?"

The kunoichi nodded ecstatically, glad to finally be trusted enough to help in such a delicate procedure. "I'll be here, Mr. Louis! Thank you so much!"

The walk back to their home was nice and quiet. Though Sakura would rather talk, she felt it was _wrong _to be too chatty around Doctor Jaeger. It's not that he was unapproachable, because whenever she did strike a conversation with him he was always very responsive and attentive, but he always had such an intense look on his face, as if his thoughts were much too important to be interrupted, that she decided that her questions could wait for another time or another person.

Maybe it was her ability to know when to be quiet that made Grisha so fond of her.

Kalura was almost done with lunch when they arrive. She grinned and greeted them eagerly, asking them about their day. Like always, Sakura was the only one that matched her enthusiasm, complaining loudly about the stupid man that tended to his fields instead of his own health and gushing over the offer the apothecary had given her.

"Aren't you a bit too young to be looking at those things?"

"Oh, please, I'm nineteen! Some girls my age have already given birth, but here I am, by my lonesome, looking after kids half my age."

Her adopted mother raised an eyebrow and placed a steaming bowl of hot soup in front of her. "Oh, and since when did you want children?"

Sakura scrunched her nose. "I'm too young for that."

"Good," Grisha commented from her side. "You _are_ too young for that. You need to go to the university if you want to become a doctor, so no suitors for a while."

Her eyes gained a mischievous glint. "Really, Grisha? Or did you suddenly forget the things we were doing at her age?" Sakura choked on her soup and Grisha started coughing uncontrollably. Kalura smirked and declared, "My work here is done."

"K-Kalura! Don't say those things! What if the kids were here?"

"Then you would give them the talk just like you do to a bunch of strangers' kids."

Just then the door opened, and Eren and Mikasa stepped in with firewood strapped in their backs. "We're back," Eren announced.

Kalura turned around from the sink and smiled at them. "Welcome back."

Any other day Sakura would have paid attention to the family's antics, but she was too busy focusing on her soup and trying to forget the conversation they had earlier. If Eren and Mikasa were here, that meant that––

_No._

That train of thought was stopping, _now_.

"Eren wants to join the Survey Corps," Mikasa uttered, breaking the comfortable silence.

She could feel Kalura's earlier easygoing demeanor slipping into a more negative one.

"M-Mikasa! Why did you tell them?"

"Eren!" Kalura put her hands on his shoulders and shook him slightly. "What are you thinking? Or did you suddenly forget about all the people that die beyond the walls?"

"I didn't!"

"Then–"

"Eren," Grisha interrupted, putting a stop to whatever heated reply Kalura had. "Is there any reason why you want to go outside?"

The boy calmed down, but his eyes remained hard. "I want to see how's it like outside! I don't want to remain ignorant, inside the walls, for the rest of my life! Also... If no one helps out, then all the deaths until now would've been meaningless!"

Something changed in Grisha, she could tell. She wasn't sure exactly what it was, but she was positive something happened. "I see... Well, the ship is waiting. I'll be going now. Come with me, Sakura."

The pink-haired girl had enough restraint to not jump in her seat from surprise. She got up and placed her dishes on the sink, following after the doctor without a word.

"Wait! You have to talk to Eren!

"Kalura, human curiosity is not something you can stop with a lecture." He got out that intriguing key he always wore around his neck and showed it for everyone to see. "Eren, when I come back, I'll show you what I've kept secret in the basement this whole time."

The boy's eyes lit in wonder and excitement. "Really?"

Grisha only hid the key back inside of his clothes. "Really. Let's go, Sakura; a ship awaits."

For all the hurry the doctor had in the house, he was sure taking his sweet time in his stroll to the docks.

"You have been teaching Eren and Mikasa the martial arts for almost a year now. How is that going?"

"They are both eager and talented. I have no doubt that they will be quite the menace when they're older."

Grisha chuckled at her choice of words. "That's good to hear. Eren... Well, he is just like his mother in that aspect: once he gets an idea in his head, it is hard to beat it out of him."

"Human curiosity cannot be restrained with violence, either," Sakura cheekily supplied.

Luckily, the doctor found it humorous enough, because he chuckled. "That is true, which is why I don't have any other choice but to let this fixation of Eren's run its course."

"So what exactly is the problem?"

"Mikasa... Wherever Eren goes, Mikasa is bound to follow."

Sakura's eyes narrowed slightly. That was a statement that had a lot of evidence backing it up, a statement that she wasn't crazy about. She understood why Mikasa had that obsession with following after Eren and looking out for him. He had not only given her the will to fight, he had also given her a home, things Sakura had been unable to give her. Oh, Mikasa adored Sakura, she was absolutely positive about that, but Eren had a special place in Mikasa's heart that he, and only he alone, would be able to have.

"I'm not too worried about that. Mikasa is strong. She can take care of both herself and Eren."

Grisha turned to her, a surprised look on his face. "You're not going to follow them?"

"It's not set in stone that Eren will join the Survey Corps, to begin with. And even if he did... Well, I cannot look after her for her whole life. The day she joins the Survey Corps is the day she becomes an adult, and nobody can look after an adult the way I want to look after Mikasa. So even if I did join the Survey Corps, I still wouldn't feel satisfied."

"But you won't prohibit her from joining?"

"No... I don't have that kind of power. I would if I could, but my hands are tied."

Grisha hummed in assent and looked forward. The dock was there, and people were starting to board the ship. "You are a good sister, Sakura. If my son does decide to join the Survey Corps, my heart will feel a little lighter knowing that you are watching out for them."

"I won't disappoint you, Mr. Grisha."

"Oh, please, Sakura, I thought we were past the formalities."

She smiled sheepishly and stopped her stroll once they reached the dock. "Sometimes I forget, Grisha."

"Take care, all right? Make sure Eren doesn't do anything stupid."

"Sure will!" Not at all... Whatever that demon child decided to do was the law, and Sakura wasn't going to waste time going against his nature.

Sakura stayed long enough to see Grisha off and then took the long way back home. It was only in those long walks that she had time to think for herself, about herself. She still didn't remember a single thing about her past, which had annoyed her endlessly a year ago, but now she worried mostly about Mikoto and Erick, about how they were handed such an undeserving death and how she was given such a great responsibility. Mikasa was one of the most well-behaved children out there, but even she sometimes needed some disciplining. Kalura and Grisha had assumed that it would be Sakura the one handing out punishments, but soon took the task away from her once they realized she was unable to even land a single light slap on the back of her hand.

How could she? How could they expect her to hit the person she cared most about in the world?

It was for that exact same reason that she refused to dissuade Mikasa from joining the Survey Corps should Eren ever decide to. It was not because she couldn't, because Mikasa would undoubtedly follow her older sister's commands, but because she didn't want Mikasa to resent her. Sakura couldn't deny her anything, even if it meant opening the path to her death.

Sakura sighed and looked up. Sunrises were more beautiful in Shiganshina, but she still contended that sunsets were more beautiful in the farmland the Ackermans owned. The sun would start disappearing from the earth, coloring the skies with beautiful pinks and oranges and purples that contrasted masterfully with the green of the fields and the forests. There were no forests in Shiganshina, at least not very close, and Sakura missed them terribly, missed the sensation of jumping from branch to branch, because that was a feeling she associated with a home she couldn't quite remember.

Thunder rolled and the ground shook, which immediately set Sakura on edge. She observed her surroundings with a critical eye and her knees almost buckled underneath her when she saw a red hand gripping the top of Wall Maria. Almost seconds later a red face looked down on them, its beady eyes calculating, almost as if it was fully aware of what was going on.

All the times she had felt helpless were dwarfed with what she was feeling right now. Looking at the head of the titan, staring at its eyes, she felt such a deep, primal fear take a hold of her heart that she couldn't think, couldn't move. She was frozen in time, imagining her death, imagining a heroic rescue, imagining her flight. She wanted to move, she wanted to hurry to her family, but she could only stare at the titan that was scrutinizing them with an unreadable gaze.

The face bowed soon afterwards and Sakura felt dread pitting in her stomach. She was right to be so alarmed, because not even five seconds later, Shiganshina was covered in a monstrous boom, followed by flying rocks. Luckily for her, she was still far enough to be away from the impact size, but she knew that many others had already lost their lives.

Wait, her house was that way!

Eren and Mikasa and Kalura were there!

Sakura leaped to the rooftops, uncaring about the surprised gasps of the bystanders. She dashed from roof to roof, quickly making her way to her house, only to be stopped by the silliest, most disgusting looking titan standing in between her and the next house. It turned its beady blue eyes toward her, and the brown mustache in his upper lip curled with his mouth when he smiled eerily.

Its chakra though... Its chakra was one of the most horrifying things Sakura had felt. She felt goosebumps appearing in her arms and resisted the urge to shiver violently. The chakra was unnatural, devoid of any malice or goodness, and at the same time _so _familiar that she froze, allowing the titan to get the upper hand and attack her.

It reached for her with astounding speed, but Sakura was faster and jumped far back, putting sufficient distance between them. She landed lightly on her feet and used the leftover momentum to throw herself at the arm, smashing fist that had wanted to grab her with a chakra-enhanced punch. The bones cracked and the titan moaned in agony, giving her enough time to run away and change her course.

There was no way she would be able to kill a titan at the moment. She could punch them in the face and send their heads flying, killing them instantly, but being in the air would put her into a very dangerous situation, since she could be easily swatted and maybe killed. Climbing a titan was something else she could do, but she wasn't very sure how it would react to her; it could grab her or squash her just as easily as she could kill a bug that was going up her leg.

She was now a couple hundred meters away from her house and almost had a heart attack when she saw that a rock had crushed the wooden home. There was a titan standing over it, but she couldn't see much because its back was facing her. Were they... Sakura blinked and put a little more chakra behind her optic nerves to better observe the blond soldier that was carrying–– Mikasa and Eren! They were alive! Sakura sighed and placed a hand against her heart, weakly noting that it was beating faster than ever.

"STOP!"

Sakura immediately hurried towards Eren. That was no normal scream, that was a plea of desperation and grief.

_Crack!_

There were no cherry blossoms in Shiganshina, she was positive about that. In fact, she was pretty sure there were not cherry blossom trees anywhere within the walls. But at that moment, those scattered splotches of blood looked like the most disturbing, gruesome cherry blossoms petals she had ever seen in her life.

Eren's expression was all she needed to know what exactly happened.

She was in the perfect position. She could kill the titan and run away, unscathed, to her foster siblings. All she needed was to be quiet and soon there would be one less titan in this wretched world.

Unfortunately for Eren, he would have to find another titan to fulfill his revenge.

"Sakura! No!"

There weren't many moments were Sakura cursed her sister, but this was one of them. The titan that had killed Kalura turned around immediately and shot his arm forwards to grab her. She was lucky she had heightened reflexes, because she barely avoided his clutching hands midair and landed on its wrist. She coated the soles of her feet with chakra to stick to the titan and dashed with almost inhuman speed up length of its arm. Once she was in its shoulder blade, she punched it in the face with all her might, the strength so great that the neck could no longer hold the head and it flew out, crashing on a house far away.

Blood was splaying from the open wound, coating Sakura in its gore. She growled softly, "_Die, you piece of shit_." She wanted to keep hitting it, wanted to release her pent up frustration, but she knew that it was no use, because the titan was dead and she wouldn't be able to relish in its pained screams. Besides, what she was supposed to do now was lead Eren and Mikasa to safety and make sure they survived the day.

Her anger could wait for another day.

Sakura leapt from the titans shoulder blades and landed neatly next to the running soldier, Hannes, who had been a good ten meters away before. The three gaped at her, but she kept running to the evacuation site, ignoring their astonished looks.

"I'll explain later," she finally snapped after they kept looking at her like an alien. That seemed to break them out of their reverie, because they stopped looking at her and sped up.

People was gathered at the docks, clamoring and begging to be let inside and evacuate. Most of them parted for her after seeing Sakura coated in steaming blood, a telltale sign that it was a titan's blood. It didn't help that her normally bright green eyes were narrowed and spiteful. The scary-looking girl parted the crowds for her foster siblings and the blond soldier that had helped them, Hannes, persuaded the soldier who was standing guard to let them in the ship.

Sakura found a small spot in the ship and pushed some people to make enough room for the three of them, ignoring the protests of the other refugees. The moans and the desolation, the crying and the panic sent her over edge and made her want to punch something or _someone, _whichever. Eren kept muttering to himself, Mikasa was damn silent like always, and she was starting to lose her mind.

The boat started moving, signaling that they had reached the maximum capacity. The people waiting to get on grew desperate and some even started throwing themselves unto the ship.

The refugees' heads snapped in the direction of the giant explosion in Shiganshina. Not knowing what was going on was infuriating, but being helpless was just destroying Sakura's sanity. Until now, she was able to do something about things. She could've stopped Kalura's death if she had been faster, could've hurried back home like she was supposed to when those despicable sex traffickers had set their eyes on Mikoto and Mikasa, she could've killed more titans before boarding the ship, but no, here she was, running away like the good coward that she was.

_Love is better motivation than hate and revenge._

Sakura grunted and looked at her side, feeling her cynicism growing at the sight of Eren's angry tears and Mikasa's unseeing stare. Hatred seemed to be doing a pretty good job for the boy, if you asked her. Those eyes brimmed with determination and ruthlessness were perfect for slaying titans.

The boy suddenly stood up and made his way to the edge of the boat, gazing at the countryside. His friend, Armin, tried to stop him, but he only slapped his hand away and declared that he would drive the titans away for good.

She frowned slightly and looked at her side, noting with growing dismay the determination behind Mikasa's eyes. She knew there would be no stopping Eren from following his dream to extinguish titans, and the only way to do that would be through the Survey Corps, the military branch with the highest mortality rate.

Could life stop taking her precious people away for just one goddamn time?

* * *

Armin's grandfather had his hands full caring for Armin, so it was up to Sakura to make sure Mikasa and Eren had shelter and food. She had not seen them much the first couple of days, leaving them to their own devices sometimes through the night. She had the responsibility of feeding them and caring for them, and since they were growing children they needed all the food she could provide, which resulted in her doing oddball jobs to earn enough money to pay for the stable she had found for them and exchanging favors for food.

At the end of the day, Sakura was much too exhausted to answer the one burning question Eren and Mikasa had for her: who exactly was she?

She groaned and plopped down on the haystack. "Again?"

"You promised us an answer," Mikasa replied, still not bulging.

"Believe me, we have a long time ahead of us."

"Sakura, please," Eren pleaded. "I think we deserve to know. We trust you with our lives... The least you could do is trust us with your secret."

The pink-haired girl sighed, knowing his logic was sound and fair. She got up, leaving the haystack, and made her way over to where Eren and Mikasa were standing, urging them to sit down with her. Once they plopped down on the floor, she extended her arms and silently asked them to give her their hands. They slowly placed their hands face up on top of her palms, the welts and angry red lines of their attempt to save their mother still very visible.

"...Will you never speak a word about this to anyone?"

They both nodded firmly.

She gingerly covered their tinier hands with her own and started healing them with her chakra, the bright green glow soothing and warm. Both of them jumped, startled, and instinctually tried to retract their hands, but Sakura held on to them firmly. After a couple of seconds of absolute silence, Sakura released their hands, now perfectly healed and scarless.

"I do not know who I am," she confessed quietly meanwhile the children admired their palms in awestruck shock. "I just know **_what _**I am."

"What are you?" Mikasa whispered shakily.

"I'm not very sure there is a correct translation, but I am a _ninja_, or, more specifically, a _medic-nin._ My job is to both assassinate and save lives, healing wounds just like how I healed yours."

Eren was still staring intently at his hands, a bright grin spreading across his face. "This is so amazing. What about that strength?"

"What I used to heal your hands is called chakra. Everyone has chakra in the world, but only a few people can use it. I haven't come across anyone able to use it, which led me to believe that either I am a freak of accident or I don't belong in this world." This revelation seemed to hit them harder than her powers, because they now openly gaped at her. She didn't give them much time to dwell on it, because she continued, "I can manipulate chakra to do many other things, like enhance my senses and even my strength. I don't actively make myself stronger, because I'm already powerful as-is, but I can coat my fists with chakra and do what you saw me do to that titan."

"You sent its head flying," Mikasa said in awe. "Is there more you can do?"

Sakura frowned. This was something she constantly wondered, and the answer still upset her, even now. "Yes, there's more, but I don't remember how to do it. It's really annoying, because I can **_feel _**the knowledge there, I just can't access it. When I try to remember, it's as if it's in the tip of my tongue, but then it vanishes for months, repeating the cycle."

"Still!" Eren stood up, barely able to control his excitement. "This is so great, Sakura! If you joined the military, if you helped out the Survey Corps, we could exterminate the titans! We could––"

Sakura's eyes widened and she scrambled to stand, putting her hands in Eren's shoulders to balance herself and draw his attention to her. "No."

Eren blinked, confused. "What do you mean, no?"

"No as in I won't join the Survey Corps. I won't join them and abandon you two." She stared with downcast eyes at Mikasa. "We've been abandoned one time too many."

His shoulders relaxed and he gently took her hands off his shoulders. "The needs of humanity outweigh the needs of two children. We can handle ourselves, Sakura."

She chuckled bitterly. "I don't think you understand, Eren. Why would I want to fight for humanity?"

The question's bluntness shocked him, because he only managed an incredulous, "What?"

"The only two people I really care about in this world are in this stable at the moment. If I have to fight for humanity to protect you two, then I will, but right now is not the moment." Mikasa extended her hands toward Sakura, urging her to help her stand, and she readily accepted, hoisting her up with ease, but neither let go of each other's hand. "Besides, if I joined the military and made my powers known, I would become a weapon. I don't want to become a weapon."

"What's wrong with being a weapon? If it's for the sake of mankind, why wouldn't you want to give yourself to that role?"

Oh, Eren and his consequentialist ideologies... Sometimes the ends didn't justify the means. She felt that she knew that, felt that it had happened before, but there it was again, in the tip of her mind's tongue, out of reach. "Do you know what weapons are?" At the shake of their heads, she continued bitterly, "They are disposable, thrown away once their usefulness is over. They also die like dogs, remembered by loved ones, forgotten by everyone else.

"I'm a human, with feelings and passions, and I refuse to be treated as anything but a human."

* * *

She spotted a familiar blond head in the front of the food stall. Armin was with his grandfather, arguing to receive their day's share of food along with three other loaves, which they claimed was for children. Naturally, the soldier handing them out was unconvinced.

"Is there a problem here?"

The soldier was unamused and glared openly at her. "Yes, there is. You damn refuges are eating all of our food and lying about who's eating it!"

Armin looked up at her with nervous blue eyes. "That's not true! I was trying to get food for you, Eren, and Mikasa!"

He grunted. "She doesn't look like a kid to me."

Her green eyes narrowed, but she knew that the soldier had the upper hand. Besides, the people in line were getting restless and she didn't want to cause a commotion. "Fine, whatever, just give the children the food. I'm not hungry anyway."

He gazed at her with wary eyes but finally relented, handing Armin three loaves of bread and left to get one for his grandfather. The duo left the line and made their way to where she guessed Mikasa and Eren would be when she felt the intensity of Armin's stare. She looked sideways and almost instantly melted at the look of pure guilt in his face. She smiled and placed a gentle hand on his blond head. "Don't worry, Armin, I'm not hungry."

Armin opened his mouth to respond but his grandfather's voice interrupted him, "Sakura! I need to talk to you."

Sakura turned sideways and nodded to acknowledge his request. She looked back at Armin and gave him her most comforting smile. "Go give them their food, would you?"

The boy nodded and left without a word, leaving the kunoichi with his grandfather alone.

"It's good that I found you so quickly," he said softly between pants.

"Hello, Mr. Arlert. I hope everything is okay."

The man frowned. "It's not, or soon it will not."

She made a confused sound with her throat. "What do you mean?"

"Come with me."

Armin's grandfather led them from the crowded courtyard to a secluded hallway. She felt apprehension growing in the pit of her stomach at how careful he was in keeping whatever he was about to say secret, judging by how cautious he was when examining their surroundings.

"The food storage," he began with a sigh. "The government has no way to feed all these people along with the bad season for crops. At this rate, everyone will starve... But word on the street is that they'll send us refugees to retake Wall Maria."

Sakura gasped and took an involuntarily step back. "But that's impossible! We... We're not trained to fight titans!"

Mr. Arlert nodded gravely. "I know, which means this spells the death for many of us, but not everyone. There is a loophole to this: the military. The government won't send away any recruits because they need them now more than ever to fight against the titans. However, they are keeping really quiet about this, because they don't want too many cadets either. There are two cutoffs for the next Cadet Corps class: the person has to be under twenty-five to apply and has to pass a test."

"So you're telling me I should join the military."

"If you want to live past the next year, then yes, I suggest that."

"You saved my life, Mr. Arlert," she whispered, her eyes filled with gratitude. "I promise I'll find a way to save yours too."

The old man laughed, the sound meant to be joyous, but coming out more as regretful and resigned. "No, no, there is no saving me, Sakura. I'm an old man, I can't do much by myself, let alone do something for society. This world needs the young, not the old, and that's the way life works."

"Mr. Arlert... If there is anything, any favor, I––"

"I only ask that you to watch over Armin," he requested. "I have seen how you strongly you keep Mikasa and Eren out of danger, and I only wish you do the same for Armin."

She looked sideways, a slight frown on her face. "I won't be able to do that anymore. Eren has expressed desire in joining the military, and Mikasa will follow... So I can no longer keep them out of danger."

He placed a gentle hand on her shoulder, making her stare at his understanding eyes. "Maybe I need to rephrase my request. Protect Armin for me. Keep him alive to the best of your ability."

"You have my word, Mr. Arlert."

She would've protected the boy anyway, but now she had an even stronger and firmer reason to do so.

* * *

"There will be three stamina tests to secure your spot in the 102nd Cadet Corps Class! First you will jog around the perimeter of this training camp until the first two hundred drop. Then you will stop and put on your 3DMG with our help if needed and continue running until the next one hundred fifty drop. The remaining three hundred fifty will carry a fallen cadet and run until the next fifty drop. If you can't run, you will die; if you can't run with your gear, you will die; if you can't run with a wounded comrade, you both will die! We don't need dead people in our ranks!"

Sakura stared grimly at their proctor. She was old, but her voice was commanding and instilled fear in most of the cadet hopefuls. Apparently she wasn't the only one amongst the refugees to hear the interesting piece of information Mr. Arlert had given her. This was the biggest class the military ever received, far bigger than what their budget allowed. They needed to feed all their cadets, and with the lack of food humanity was experiencing, they needed to quickly get rid of the useless ones. In fact, even after the cutoff, they were going to still have an excess of around fifty cadets.

"We will take turns running behind you! If you are too slow and we catch you, you are out!"

It was a ruthless test. Everyone knew that the ones that dropped would die in less than a year, but the proctors still stared at them with unwelcoming, unsympathetic eyes. A little bit of compassion would never kill anyone, but these soldiers must've missed that memo because they were as cold-hearted as they came.

"Ready, set, go!"

They all started jogging immediately, their panic setting them on the edge. Even though Sakura had amazing stamina, she knew better than to lead the line. Those jogging too fast would soon tire out and be the first to drop, after all.

A yell broke her out of her musings and with a backward glance she saw one of the proctors following them catch three unsuspecting cadets. He might as well shoot them right there and save them the misery later on. Sakura sped up then, quickly taking the lead and easily maintaining it, much to the surprise of her fellow competitors.

The running lulled her into a sense of comfort, and she unwittingly remembered when she told her three wards that she was enlisting in the military to save her hide from dying out in the fields. She had wanted them to try to convince her otherwise, to convince her to stay because they had decided not to join the Survey Corps and they needed her, but Eren only smiled happily and asked her to wait for them. Mikasa and Armin nodded reluctantly, still unsure of their own choices, which made Sakura feel a little better.

A whistle interrupted her reverie and she looked around, surprised to see everyone breathing heavily. Some were walking away with dejected heads, telltale signs that they had not made it. She made her way to the small house and asked one of the soldiers to help her put her 3DMG on meanwhile she drank enough water to satisfy her thirst but not upset her stomach at the same time.

"Alright you ungrateful bastards, go!"

The remaining cadets started running, though their speed was severely stunted. The 3DMG, though surprisingly light, was still uncomfortable to move around with. It took Sakura around ten laps to get used to the weight, and by then around fifty cadets had already left and were making their way to the center of the field with the rest of the rejected.

She kept jogging lightly in the front, unmatched by anyone. She already attracted quite a lot of attention due to her pink hair, and being the one cadet that didn't get tired was not doing wonders to her reputation. It couldn't be helped that she knew how to use chakra and make her body more resilient and powerful than a normal human's. Well, that certainly gave her an unfair advantage, yes, but she needed to stay alive for the sake of Mikasa, Eren, and Armin.

This wasn't just her life on the line.

Everyone heard the whistle and let out a breath of relief. They headed to the middle of the training grounds and most of them greedily gulped all the water they could take. Sakura only took small sips, mindful to not drink too much. She wiped the excess water from her mouth and looked around, cringing internally at the marked silence between the cadets that were still in the game and those who were out.

It wouldn't hurt to make a conversation with the person she would carry for a while, would it?

"Hey." She should call her a woman, because she certainly looked like one, but her eyes were so lost that she couldn't help but mentally call her a girl. "Do you mind if I choose you to be my partner?"

She recoiled, a bit shocked. "Why me? I'm heavy and tall, and you're so short and skinny. Everyone is betting that you're gonna be one of the first ones to fall right now."

Sakura held back her smirk. "What about you?"

The girl gaped at her and blushed. "I..." She looked away and mumbled, "I bet for you."

She couldn't hold it anymore and giggled. Sakura could feel the stares of people focused on the two of them, but she didn't mind; she was laughing, genuinely laughing, and there was nothing that could hold her back. "Oh, I wouldn't worry about that. I promise I'll make you win. So, what do you say? Will you let me carry you?"

"I–I guess."

"Thanks. What's your name?"

"Bertha. Yours?"

The soldier yelled at them to prepare themselves. Sakura extended a hand towards her, and was secretly happy when she accepted without hesitation. "Sakura. Nice to meet you, Bertha."

The kunoichi didn't give her time to prepare and put an arm in the middle of her back and another in the back of her knees and she lifted her with ease. She started jogging ahead of the crowd, and had to restrain her laughter when she saw Bertha's shocked expression. Sure, her method of carrying her was a bit unorthodox, but Bertha was too tall and she would sure hit her 3DMG with every step she took. She could also carry her on her shoulder, but then that would be extremely uncomfortable.

So she was the only one carrying her cadet as if she were running in a field of dandelions, complete with the smile on her face and the blush on Bertha's.

Sometimes she really cracked herself up.

Much to everyone's surprise but her own, Sakura finished at the lead once the whistle stopped them again. She was panting, but she was in better shape than everyone else, who thought that the dirty floor would be the best place to lay down and rest. She gingerly put Bertha down and thanked her deeply for spending time with her, even if it was in less than optimal conditions.

"Alright, you brats, don't get cocky! You still have three years ahead of you!"

That put everyone's spirits down, especially the ones that hadn't made it, because three years was two years more than what they were expected to survive. Tears filled Bertha's eyes and she brokenly whispered her thanks to Sakura for making her win the bet and turned away from her.

Her heart gave a painful clench and she grabbed Bertha by her bicep. She whirled her heads towards her, with tears streaming down her face and a confused frown.

Sakura was at a loss for what possessed her to grab unto the woman, but her mouth tightened to straight line on its own and she blurted, "Live."

She smiled sadly and left without a word, leaving the winner alone in the field.

* * *

**When Sakura says that she's a ninja and a medic-nin, the words she used were kunoichi and iryo-nin.**

**Fun Fact: The original draft for this chapter included Sakura saving Kalura. However, after re-watching and reading SnK for like the third time, I noticed how many times Eren flashbacks to his mother being eaten and realized that interfering with _that _plot point is a no-no, at least for Eren's development. So, sorry Kalura.**

**Pairing is still undecided, but after 7 people requesting LeviSaku I am leaning towards that. I personally lean towards it too. I will probably decide by the time she meets and interacts with almost the whole cast at least once, which will be in around five chapters, give or take one?**

**Also, just a reminder that this is not God-mode Sakura story where she kicks so much ass it hurts. Most of the times she won't be able to save the day. The story is only as good as its conflict is, meaning if you make Frodo a Jedi you gotta give Sauron the Death Star (Yes that phrase is not mine). That's not to say she won't become powerful, because AU baby, but by then Sauron would definitely have the Death Star _and_ the Star Forge. Also, she _is _a ninja... They are supposed to keep their secrets close to their hearts and whatnot.**

**I would like to deeply thank Guest, Atsirk Enoh, pepergirl001, peach, Kitsukami, brokenmaelstrom, Genuinely-Unique, OnePiecefan202, LadyRidger, Lori, asredwer, mun3litKnight, Basia Orci, and Arisu-kun for being so awesome and leaving reviews. Your kind words always encourage me to get a chapter out extra early. Also many thanks to those who added this story to their alerts and favorites!**

**Reviews are life,**

**Penpal**


	4. 102nd Trainees Squad

Reading guide for this chapter:

"Talk."

"_Emphasis."_

* * *

The entrance ceremony was not only uneventful, but also depressing. They had lost half of the cadet hopefuls, and most, if not all of them, would be dead by the end of next year.

She landed on her bed and put her arm across her eyes, shutting them from the light immediately. She knew that they weren't going to send children to reclaim Wall Maria, but what was the definition of a child? A seven-year-old? A fifteen-year-old? A ten-year-old? What exactly was the cutoff age? If either of those three were ordered to go, she would go crazy.

"Is the bunk below yours taken?"

Sakura removed her arm from her face and sat up to get a better view of the person addressing her. She looked very young, and she was very short, perhaps shorter than Sakura, which was quite the feat by itself. However, she knew better than to judge her based on looks alone; this girl had survived the laps of death, after all.

"No, not at all. Take it."

She smiled, her amber eyes crinkling. "Thank you, Sakura!"

Sakura cocked her head to the side, surprised. "You know me?"

The girl snorted, as if the question amused her. "Who doesn't know you? Not only did you carry a girl that looked twice your weight, you finished first. Besides, the hair doesn't help."

Sakura smiled sheepishly and ran a hand through her long pink locks. "Heh, true, true. But it's a bit unfair how you know mine and I don't know yours. We're gonna be bunk mates, after all."

The girl put her suitcase on her bed and beckoned her to come down. The nineteen-year-old did so quickly, foregoing the ladder and jumping down straight ahead. This action seemed to amuse her new bunk mate, because she started giggling uncontrollably.

"Is something wrong?"

She waved a hand up and down. "No, no, nothing. It's just that people say that you're this cold and serious person who doesn't want to meet people and it's just funny that you did that right now."

Sakura frowned and pouted, not appreciating how the rumors painted her as such an unapproachable person. She smiled often, right? Or was it maybe how intimidating she had been in the test? She should've known it was going to bite her in the ass. "I don't know where that rumor came from, honestly."

The girl extended a hand towards her. "Petra Ral from Honig, in the middle of Rose."

She took her hand and shook it firmly. "Sakura Ackerman from Shiganshina, south of Maria."

Petra immediately retracted her hand from hers, and looked at her in a mixture of shock and apprehension. "Where you there when..." she trailed off, unsure on how to continue her question, or too scared to offend her, Sakura wasn't too sure.

She appreciated the gesture, nevertheless. "Yeah. I was there."

"I'm so sorry, I shouldn't have asked. My parents were from Shiganshina too, but they moved to the north before I was born. I heard many of their friends died that day."

"We were unprepared," she told her quietly. She remembered her inability to save Kalura, her helplessness as the Armored Titan broke through Wall Maria, her failed promise to protect her wards. "No one saw it coming."

"You saw the titans then? How... Are they as scary as everyone says?"

She sighed and sat down on the floor between their beds and the other two bunk beds in the other side of the room. She wondered where their other two roommates were, but then she remembered that she had finished her dinner earlier than anyone else and had quickly retired, meaning that they must be still eating. "They are scary, but what they do is scarier. Especially because they're so big, you can only feel like an insect in comparison."

"That was my main reason for not wanting to join the military. I can't bear the thought of meeting them..."

"Then why are you here, if you don't mind my asking?" She didn't phrase her question rudely; she was genuinely curious as to why the girl had joined the military if she was so scared of titans. From what Sakura could tell, she wasn't in any danger of being chosen to go retake Wall Maria because she was a citizen of Wall Rose. If anything, she should be avoiding this place at all costs.

"My dad wants me to join the Military Police and get as far away from Wall Rose as possible. They're scared one of those two special titans might appear any time soon and take us by surprise again."

Sakura nodded slowly, a thoughtful look in her face. "That makes sense. I don't blame your dad for thinking like that. I'm not entirely sure about all of this either."

"What about you, Sakura? What do you want to do after all of this?"

She shrugged. She still wasn't sure about what she was going to end up doing. Deep down she knew chances were she had to join the Survey Corps, but she still held on to the hope that she would be able to convince Eren to join the Military Police and live a peaceful life inside Wall Sina. Who knows, maybe he would marry Mikasa there (or not, if they didn't like each other that way when they were older, she was okay either way), and she would marry some civilian who could give her a taste of a normal, stress-free life and make her forget about Shiganshina.

"I'm not very sure right now. It could honestly go either way."

Petra cocked her head to the side, her gaze confused. "You don't want to join the Military Police."

"Still not sure what I want to do. There are many variables involved."

The girl's mouth opened slightly and she close it soon afterwards, nodding in understanding that she didn't feel like discussing the topic at hand. "Hm, I wonder where our roommates are."

Sakura snorted. "Maybe I scared them away?"

The girl laughed and her honey eyes crinkled in amusement. "That would be awesome! Imagine having a whole room to ourselves! No need to worry about––"

A knock interrupted their door and one of their trainers whose name escaped Sakura stood at the door rigidly. Both girls jumped and stood at full attention, their right hand over their heart and their left behind their backs.

"Due to a lack of girls, you two have been assigned a room to yourselves! Remember that there is training in the morning!"

"Sir, yessir!" they replied in unison.

The commanding officer's glare softened a bit and he closed the door behind them, leaving them a mess of giggles as soon as they were sure he was far away. "We should say stuff like that more often!" Petra said between gasps.

Sakura nodded along, unable to form a reply. Soon after their sniggers died they both agreed they were exhausted and quickly went to bed. Even though the other two beds were free, Petra still took the one below hers.

She faced the other two bunk beds as Petra's soft snores filled the room and couldn't help but think that Bertha could be sleeping with them in this room right now.

* * *

_You had chakra, of course you beat the stamina test. You could have been me, and I could have been you, if you didn't have your precious chakra. And now here I am, facing titans. And now here I am, about to die, without anyone crying for me._

* * *

It was customary that the cadets were tested on their balance the first day after the ceremony. Not only did it give the trainees a feel of what they were going to use for most of their military careers, it served as a way for the officers to quickly judge where in the gifted spectrum the cadets were.

Their instructor was a harsh man by the name of Emil Ernst. His hair was silvery and his face was filled with wrinkles, but his eyes held such wisdom and experience that there was no single trainee who dared to cross him. Rumor was it he had killed over one hundred titans in his career in the Survey Corps before joining the Military Police and even quickly rose through the ranks there.

There were five 3DMG testing sites set up so that five cadets could go at the same time. Though this made the process slow, since there were three hundred people to go through, it did give everyone a clear view of what was expected of them and what they were supposed to do.

Sakura admired Petra's form. Though she had made her hesitance to encounter titans very clear, she was masterful in keeping her balance and people were already murmuring that she had a very real shot at being the valedictorian. Though it slightly irritated her that people were making such a long-term judgement based on a simple task, she had to admit that Petra's form was by far the best.

"Ackerman!"

She sighed under her breath and made her way to the testing site Emil was pointing at. She could see that suddenly all the stares were on her, but she didn't care about that. What she cared was about the officer currently strapping the 3DGM around her waist, making sure he didn't screw up anywhere. She knew her inhuman reflexes would kick in if something went wrong, but she didn't want to raise unnecessary questions right now; her pink hair was novelty enough.

They hoisted her up and she felt a tiny bit of panic at not being able to touch the ground but she quickly got used to the feeling of being in the air. To be honest, she felt a certain degree of freedom in being up in the air. Usually she required to actively use chakra to perform something extraordinary, but here she was, "levitating" without using her power once. For once, she felt as she was achieving something based on her own merits.

Now that she was used to the feeling, she relaxed her somewhat stiff body slowly, allowing her to shift as she went adapted to the shift of the wires. Soon her body was so relaxed that she was swinging lightly along with the wires, completely at ease with the feeling by now. People were starting to murmur in the crowd, pointing fingers at her and making her feel uncomfortable.

"Okay, that's enough. Bring her down!"

Sakura felt slightly disappointed that her moment of freedom was over so quickly, but she quickly squashed it by reminding herself that she would be using the 3DGM for quite a long time.

Even though Emil didn't tell her anything, her perceptive eyes could see the surprise and slight awe that he had for her performance. That was enough to make her feel proud of herself, because for once in her life people were amazed by something she had done herself. She did not have to rely on her muscle memory or her chakra to do this, this was all her and her gift for learning quickly.

Petra tackled her arm and shook her slightly. "That was amazing! How did you do that?"

"Do what?"

"_That_. You just stood there like if nothing was happening. It looked as if you could walk on air!"

She didn't know how to react. If she brushed off her comment and said it was nothing, she would come off as arrogant and maybe upset her rapidly-becoming friend. However, if she went and lied about how hard it was, she might come off as arrogant as well for overplaying her feats. So, either way, it was a lose-lose for her. "I guess I just felt relaxed up there. Tall, you know, something that we're not."

That seemed to be the right answer, because she giggled. "I'll follow your advice next time. Could you give me some pointers later on, though?"

Sakura smiled. "Sure, Petra. Just tell me when and I'll be there."

* * *

It was the first time the 102nd Trainee Corps Class saw her excited, but right now they couldn't care less. It was hard listening to a lecture trying to persuade them that something useless they were about to do was actually useful. They were hypocrites, really, trying to convince them to practice hand-to-hand combat when it wasn't graded that highly anyway.

"You're too excited about this," Petra commented with a sulky voice.

Sakura gaped at her, horrified about her _lack _of excitement. "Are you kidding me? This is awesome!"

"I take it you have some experience in this."

"My specialty, if I can call it that."

"You have many specialties, do you know that?"

"So I've been told, but so do you."

"I guess we're women of many talents, aren't we?"

"Rawr."

"Ackerman! Ral! If you're done with your girly chat we would like to get on with this lesson!"

The two girls froze up and looked down to the floor, their cheeks heating up instantly when they heard the barely contained snickers around them. Ugh, red cheeks clashed horribly with her hair.

"Ackerman! Bozado! You're fighting here!"

She made her way to where Emil had pointed, her cheeks still a bit red from embarrassment. Standing there was a man with unruly dirty blond hair a couple of inches taller than her. His small hazel eyes were cocky and he seemed to have a perpetual smirk. "So I got paired up with Pinky, huh?"

Sakura's eyes twitched in annoyance. She vaguely recalled the cat she saved, Blacky, and suddenly felt guilty for not stealing him and renaming him. "Don't you have better things to do than antagonize girls, you old man?"

Bozado tried to play it off cool, but she noticed his hands clenching and unclenching, a clear sign of irritation. "_Hey_, I'll have you know I just turned seventeen, so I don't know what you're talking about, _Pinky_."

Her nose wrinkled in disgust. If this kid was two years younger than her, just exactly how old did she look? She grew slightly panicked until she remembered a conversation she and Petra had earlier about their appearances, how Sakura just adored her honey hair and Petra commented that her ivory skin looked youthful enough to make her think she was fifteen.

"Start!"

Bozado got into a sloppy fighting stance meanwhile Sakura just stood there, relaxing her muscles. After countless of practices she had learned that her body was best-suited to retaliate, not start. This gave her a chance to see her opponent's first movement and devise a strategy to quickly incapacitate with the minimum amount of effort and time required.

"Ladies first," he said with an arrogant bow.

"Go ahead then," she replied without missing a beat.

That seemed to get him, because now not only did his fists clench, but his eyes narrowed even more. "I'm being nice here. Hit me."

"I've made it a habit to let my opponents hit me first. It would be too unfair otherwise."

His forehead twitched and his lip curled. "Why you!" He launched himself at her with a bit too much force, but she had already seen his punch coming a mile away. She sidestepped and put her foot where she was, immediately tripping him. She quickly got away from him and took his old spot, standing there innocently and looking away.

He scrambled up and glared daggers at her. "That was unfair!"

"That's why I let you go first."

Bozado growled and charged at her with the intention of putting her in a choke hold and possible doing a body throw. Even though he had been acting cocky beforehand, Sakura knew that he had a very good reason, because he knew what he was doing. Sure, his form was somewhat sloppy, but he had obviously had training in hand-to-hand combat, something most of the recruits couldn't boast about.

She crouched, avoiding his choke hold, and swept her leg at him, hoping to throw him again. Much to her surprise, he jumped high enough to avoid the attack and as soon as he landed he aimed a low kick at her abdomen. She knew avoiding this one would be hard because she was crouching, but she bent her back enough to avoid the kick narrowly and used the power of her arms to quickly lift her body backwards to do a handstand and let herself fall gracefully enough to land lightly on her feet.

He just stared at her in shock but shook his head, snapping out of his reverie. He aimed a punch at her shoulder but she stopped him with a swift kick to his inner arm. He cried out in pain, and she used his distraction as an advantage to move next to him, wrap one arm around his waist and the other one behind his head, and she brought them both down to slam him to the floor as if he were some little kid.

The impact probably ripped the skin from her knuckles, but that was fine, since the point of the spar was to _not _kill her partner. His head was moving from side to side, probably dazed. She had gone a little bit overboard, because her left shoulder hurt like a bitch and that wasn't supposed to happen. She retrieved her hand from the back of his head and stood up, yet again ignoring the blatant stares from her fellow cadets.

He was probably still seeing stars, but she saw his eyes focus on her, and from the frown on his face he must not be very happy with her. She extended her left hand first to help him up, but upon seeing the blood dripping down from her knuckles, she quickly changed it, smiling sheepishly down at him. Seeing that she was not unscathed probably did wonders to his mood, because he took her hand and hoisted himself up.

"Not bad, Ackerman."

"Sakura."

"I knew that."

"All right, _Bozado_."

"Olou."

"I knew that."

* * *

The training field was empty except for a tiny pink-haired girl doing push ups, her light breathing betraying the number of sets she had already done. The sky was darkening quickly, which meant curfew would soon be called and she might miss dinner, but she couldn't care less. She was working, training her physical strength to her body's limits. Today she had seen Petra carry a grown man by herself with little to no effort. Sure, she could carry three times her own size easily, but that was with the help of chakra.

She wasn't very sure where the limits of her body stopped.

It surprised her, how agile and powerful the cadets were. They threw themselves down cliffs to see how easily they could turn and shoot the grappling hook to stop their descent, they ran for miles with heavy backpacks, they cut down trees with just their steel blade and muscle... The cadets did all of that _without _chakra. They were amazing in that aspect, and they were just first years. No one had hailed a single one of them a genius...

Well, no one until now, but there were whispers of a certain pink-haired prodigy who outranked all of them because of a tiny _insignificant_ thing called chakra.

Her peers and superiors admired Sakura, but they didn't admire _her, _but rather her _chakra_, and they weren't even aware of that. To them, Sakura was simply a hidden gem in a field of coal. If she had been normal, she would've been even worse than coal; at least coal could be turned into a diamond. If she had been normal, maybe Bertha would be here in her stead.

Everyone wanted to be like Sakura, but she wasn't even like them to begin with. They were comparing themselves to a farce.

Her arms shook and she collapsed on the floor, her chest receiving the brutal end of the fall. She groaned and turned her body around so that she was laying down with her back against the ground.

The sun was almost set, and the stars were starting to appear in the purple sky. Even though the darkness covered most of the field, if enhanced her eyesight she could see almost as clearly as if it were daylight. As much as she wanted to hate what made her different than the rest of the people she would fight with, she couldn't help but admit it was extremely useful.

She heard footsteps approach her and she wasn't at all surprised when a woman stopped just before hitting her head. Her skin was darker than most, and her eyes were two large black jewels that glittered with amusement and something else. From her vantage point she looked taller than her, but then again that wasn't hard considering Sakura was one of the shortest recruits.

"You will miss dinner if you continue like that."

The woman extended a hand towards her and Sakura warily took it. She had never seen her before, which was a bit weird, since her looks were quite exotic and she almost never missed anyone like that. Then again, if Sakura was bad with names, she was horrible with faces.

"Thanks," she murmured, still a bit out of her element. "I know this will sound rude, but who are you?"

She laughed, the sound harsh and throaty. "It is quite alright, Sakura Ackerman. I don't expect you to know everyone in our class, especially when most people avoid you like a plague."

The pink-haired girl blinked. She was actively avoided? "What? Why?"

She raised a thick black eyebrow, as if the question should already have an answer. "Your determination intimidates most people. Not many can do five sets of fifty push-ups in less than an hour."

"You've been watching me?"

"Perhaps I admire determination more than I fear it."

"You never told me your name."

Her lips curved into a smirk. Everything about her was exotic, and Sakura could feel herself attracted to the mysterious aura she exuded. "Amina Talman, at your service. I am your new roommate."

Sakura's body stiffened. She hadn't expected that, hadn't thought that they would separate her and Petra. "What about Petra?"

"Oh, she's still in your room, of course. It's just that my three roommates were shipped off to the landfills ––a much better fate than those who failed the entrance exam, if you ask me. So instead of leaving me alone they decided to pair me with the room occupied by our class's two geniuses."

"And you're not intimidated at all?"

"Like I said, there is beauty in determination. I want to become stronger, and you two can help me with that."

Sakura crossed her arms, suddenly wary about Amina's reasons for seeking her assistance. "And you want me and Petra to help you?"

"I thought that was obvious, but yeah, I do. If our instructors decided to rank us tomorrow, I would probably be in the last ten."

The military ranked the Trainee Corps at the end of every year to measure their success and point out where things could be improved. This also happened along the same dates the graduating class chose their branch. The 100th Trainee Corps Class was going to graduate in six months, which meant they still had half a year to go before the rankings.

"Unless you want to join the Military Police, I don't see why that matters too much."

"I want to join the Military Police. It is the only reason why I came here."

Now it was her turn to be incredulous and raise an eyebrow. "Well, it's a good thing that you sought us in the first year. I don't think we would've been able to do much later on. Have you asked Petra if this is alright with her?"

"She said it was fine. I just needed to confirm with you."

Sakura's eyes narrowed and she pouted. "Well, at least I don't have to deal with that old man so much anymore if I'm going to train you."

"I asked Olou Bozado for help too and he gladly took me in as well."

"You're not very good with negotiations are you? You should've kept that a secret."

"He's one of your two only friends. I might even venture and say he's one of your best friends."

It was very hard for her to keep the horrified expression from her face. "Oh dear, no. Hell no. If anything we're rivals."

"So are you going to help me or what?"

Sakura may have been nice, apparently contrary to popular belief, but even she knew she was being played like a fool by this woman, which was quite weird considering it was _she _who was asking for help, not the other way around. "What do you have for me?"

Amina smirked, as if she had suddenly reeled in the bait. "For starters, a better image. You have no idea how useful it will be once you're in the Military Police to have an approachable image."

Ah, nothing felt nicer than having the upper hand. "You assume I want to join the Military Police. That was your first mistake."

"Who wouldn't? It was a logical assumption," she replied a bit defensively. Though Sakura was quickly growing to dislike Amina, she couldn't tell her to go away, be it because of the banter or the fact she was the first person to approach her willingly in almost four months. Even a girl like her could grow lonely. "I'll be honest, I didn't think you would give me such a hard time with this, especially because your friends already agreed with me."

Sakura sighed and gazed past her to their cabin which acted as a mess hall, where people were already filing out to their dorms. So much for dinner. "I was going to help you, no questions asked, but then you overplayed your hand and thought I had to be manipulated. I don't like being manipulated, and I don't like being used. I guess that was your mistake."

Much to her surprise, Amina looked thoroughly chastised and ashamed. "Perhaps there was some wisdom in my father's words. You are right, and for that I ask for your forgiveness."

"Good, you have it. We start tomorrow at dawn, alright?"

Her dark eyes widened, surprised at the sudden change in her disposition. She smiled tentatively and nodded shyly, a sharp contrast from the sly girl that had approached her not even ten minutes ago. Her eyes lit with something and she reached into a pouch she carried in her back and took out a piece of bread and bottle of water. "Oh, here you go. I forgot I brought these for you."

Sakura took them from her greedily and started munching them, uncaring if she had bread crumbs around her lips and if she drank like a mule. "Say, if you wanted to have the upper hand, you should've just bribed me with food."

"I'll keep that in mind next time I want something," she noted with a giggle.

* * *

Just as Amina had predicted, Sakura had become much more approachable after she decided to tutor her. She was no longer regarded with fear, but rather respect, and this improved her mood greatly. Her pupil, though lacking in the physique department, was very eager, waking up before sunrise to run laps and working on her stamina until dusk. She, Olou, and Petra usually took turns training Amina, because waking up extra early and going to bed just before curfew was extremely taxing on the body and mind, especially with the normal cadet training they went through.

Sakura had also started depending less on her chakra. In the next six months of training, she gained around fifteen pounds of pure muscle, and though it wasn't very outwardly obvious, Sakura could feel the effects whenever she picked or pushed something without the help of chakra. She was naturally strong, yes, but this was something new, something that was _hers _and hers alone.

That's not to say she neglected her chakra training, because she didn't. As much as she felt uncomfortable having something that naturally made her better than everyone else, her chakra was a part of her and she needed to nurture it, especially since she needed it to protect Mikasa, Eren, or Armin. Her knowledge of chakra was limited –– _very _limited–– because for now she only knew one ninjutsu and that was all she could practice when she was positive she was alone. There were two parts to chakra: the physical and spiritual one. She honed the physical part every day, which made her naturally stronger, but the spiritual part was rather lacking since both her experiences and studies of jutsu were forgotten or gone for good.

The only remedy she figured out was meditation. It wasn't the best, because she was still walking in the dark when it came to meditation, but she felt good after clearing her mind for sometimes even an hour. After a couple of weeks of meditation she noticed that moulding her chakra to enhance some parts of her senses and physique had become simpler and more natural, which encouraged her meditation bouts.

"Hey, Pinky, are you gonna sit there with that stupid look on your face or go to class?"

The level of clear-headedness and peace that had taken her twenty minutes to achieve came crashing down immediately. She opened one green eye to glare icily at Olou, who was gazing down at her with an annoying smirk.

"Thank you for interrupting my meditation period!"

"You're welcome. Now are you gonna go or do I have to leave you? We're learning about titan killing today."

"Do you have any idea how long it takes me to clear my thoughts?"

"It didn't look like you were very peaceful there, with that frown and all. If anything, I would say you were brooding."

Sakura pouted, peevish that she had been found out. She extended an arm towards Olou and ordered him to help her up with a single look. He raised his eyebrows, amused at her expression, but hoisted her up without a word. She dusted the dirt from her uniform and he started walking away to where their classes were, leaving Sakura to catch up with him.

"You know, just because you're the best in this class doesn't mean you can't go around skipping class," he commented offhandedly once she was sauntering next to him.

"I wasn't _skipping_, I was mediating. _Big _difference. Besides, since you found me, that means I didn't miss class."

Olou snorted. "Yeah, _today_, but you're conveniently forgetting all those tardies. Where would you be without Petra and me?"

She grunted but offered no response, because there was nothing she could say to dispute the claim. She was absentminded nowadays, either thinking about her three wards or keeping her nasty nightmares at bay. Her ivory skin was paler than usual, and black bags had recently taken residence under her eyes. She wasn't sure if Petra or Olou had noticed, but if they had, she was grateful they hadn't asked, because she didn't know how to explain.

They arrived at the class just before their instructor closed the door. Usually, they had another teacher who taught them the history of the three Military Branches and their codes and regulations, but since today they were going tot talk about titan-killing, Emil Ernst had taken over the stage today.

If there was something the cadets hated more than hand-to-hand combat, it was definitely lectures. They had come here to fight for a chance to live within Wall Sina, and some were even here to fight for humanity, but no one was here to learn about the history of the 3DGM unless it had something to do with learning how to _handle _the 3DGM, which was a big, fat no most of the times.

Still, everyone was alert and paying attention for today. This lesson was both important and useful.

"All right, who can tell me how to kill a titan?"

The simple word _titan_ made her involuntarily shiver. She still remembered the utter terror she felt not under its gaze, but because of its chakra. The familiarity was so _wrong _but there at the same time that she had been confused and rendered immobile with just being in their presence.

Sakura thought people's hands were going to shoot up in the air, but surprisingly nobody dared to. It wasn't because they were scared of Emil, though most of the times they were, but everyone looked genuinely confused, as if they hadn't thought about it beforehand.

She remembered the smiling titan, the one that had killed Kalura almost half a year ago. She had punched it in its face and set its head flying a couple of meters. That titan was certainly dead, right? After all, how could a headless titan eat?

"Yes, it was a question many people had when those bastards first appeared. Nothing worked. Not even cutting their fucking heads off."

Nobody, except Petra and Olou, noticed the pink-haired student stiffen violently. Petra became concerned once her green eyes gained a horrified and enraged edge.

Sakura barely listened to the rest of the lesson. She learned that titans were dependent on the sun and they could only be killed by cutting a special place in their nape, but that was it. So that shit was still alive, eating more humans? She still hadn't avenged Kalura's death? Sakura had been convinced that the smiling fucker was gone for good, but obviously that was not true.

"Sakura," Petra whispered worryingly. "Are you okay?"

She visibly snapped out of her stupor and managed a weak smile towards Petra. "Yeah, yeah, I'm fine."

* * *

_You had chakra, and you still couldn't save me. You were standing right there, watching, but you didn't do anything. What, too scared to let other people know who you are? Too afraid that we would fear you, condemn you? Well, congratulations, because now I'm dead but at least you got to keep your secret a bit longer, right?_

_And to add insult to the injury, you couldn't even _kill _the titan! If my Eren were to die at its hands..._

* * *

The Trainee Corps had three different centers, all located between Wall Sina and Wall Rose now. One of them was near a wide plane, the other by a lake, and the last one by a big mountain. The current 100th Trainee Corps class was in the wide plane, which meant that the 103rd Trainee class would be assigned to the wide plane training area, the most coveted one out of all three.

The least wanted area would be the one near the mountains, which was the 102nd Trainee Class's home. Their instructors would make them run up and down the mountain every Sunday. Though they had been doing this for nearly eight months, it still made everyone detest Sundays, even if they had the rest of the day off to do as they pleased.

Sakura's calves and thighs were burning, but she carried on. Amina was jogging next to her, panting and shivering from the brutal cold, but she refused to be anywhere but next to her. Petra and Olou, on the other hand, were bickering ahead, something about cheating in an artillery test. It made her wonder why people considered Olou to be their friend when they were only constantly fighting.

A pair of long pink strands stuck in her sweaty face and she pulled them back with an annoyed grunt, only to have them hit against her cheeks with each step she took. "That's it. I'm cutting my hair."

Amina replied with a skeptical voice, "You're cutting your hair? _You_?"

Sakura turned and glared at her slightly. "What?" she barked. "You doubt me?"

Her demeanor scared a few people around her and they either sped up or slowed down. Amina, on the other hand, was quite nonchalant about it. "It's just hard to believe. I wouldn't be surprised if you had a shrine dedicated to your hair hidden somewhere in our room."

"I don't _worship _my hair. I just like it."

"You adore your hair, and you're thinking about cutting it."

"It's annoying and it has gotten too long. For giving me second thoughts you're gonna help me out now."

Amina _tsked_ and glared at her slightly. "Ha! As if. You would cut me into tiny pieces if I so much as cut an extra centimeter."

"Well, more of a reason to be cautious, right?"

The rest of their jog was silent, which was good because they were going through the most beautiful part of the mountain, especially now that it was the beginning of summer and the trees looked healthy. Running in the mountain had been torturous, especially when there had been a snowstorm the day before.

Their mess hall cabin had never felt so delicious before. Sakura sat down with Petra, Amina, Olou, and Olou's black-haired roommate Jett Kaiser, as usual, and they chowed down their lunch without a word. Now that she thought about it, nobody was talking, probably too tired and hungry to even make an attempt at a conversation.

"Hey, Jett, want to practice after this?" Petra asked hopefully, breaking the comfortable silence. She was so intent on gauging Jett's expression that she missed how Olou's eyes narrowed menacingly at his food.

He raised a dark eyebrow, as if asking _are you kidding me?_ "Where do you get all this energy from, Petra? We just finished running up and down a damn mountain."

"There's always time for practice, especially with rankings coming up in a month."

The subject aggravated most of the people in the surrounding tables, because nobody was looking forward to their exams. Sure, low-marks did not mean that they would be shipped off, but if an instructor decided that they weren't fit to continue then they were going to be seeing a landfill for the rest of their lives. And of course the ones sitting on the table, with the exception of Amina, were the least worried about the test considering their talent.

"Sakura is getting a haircut. Don't you want to help out?" Amina asked, hoping to divert Petra from the topic.

The brown-haired girl ––who was now taller than her so she should really stop referring to her as a girl–– grabbed her by the shoulders and started pushing and pulling her. "You're cutting your hair?" she exclaimed. Luckily most of the mess hall were now holding various conversations, which meant that the comment had not been as loud as Sakura heard it.

"Yeah," she replied with a twitch.

"Ooh, I want to help! Sorry, Jett, maybe another time!"

"I didn't even agree in the first place..."

The minute Sakura finished her soup Petra grabbed her by the arm and started pulling her away. She called Amina to help her out, and both Sakura and her knew better than to protest their mother-hen friend. She borrowed a pair of scissors from the room next to them and boasted about her hair cutting techniques because her grandfather had been one of the best barbers in Honig.

"Oh, I'll leave your hair absolutely wonderful! But first, we'll take a bath and then come back."

What Sakura thought would be a horrible afternoon soon became one filled with laughter and jokes. Petra told a story on how one time she spilled cranberry juice on her skirt and had to hide it from everyone or else they would've thought it was period blood. Amina then related how she had cried to her mother for an hour because of her period because she thought she was pregnant and she wanted a little sister, not a daughter.

So much talk about menstruation led her thoughts back to Mikasa. She would be eleven now, a normal age for a girl to get her period. Sakura imagined how scared and traumatized she would be, apparently bleeding from a place she wasn't supposed to be bleeding without a single explanation. Every girl received the talk about her monthly cycle. Sakura got it from Mikoto, but Mikasa had no female comfort.

Petra was halfway done with her cutting her hair and talking about an embarrassing crush she had when she was ten when a loud knock interrupted their talk. Amina, being the least occupied, stood up from their little circle and went to open the door, revealing a courier with a gentle, old face. He handed Amina a single letter, tipped his hat a little, and left without a word.

"This is for you," Amina said with a small frown, handing Sakura the letter with her name and address written in the front. The handwriting was eerily similar, but in the end unrecognizable._  
_

Sakura unfolded the paper and a wide smile spread across her face when she realized it was Mikasa's handwriting.

"Who is it?"

"My sister," she breathed back.

"Oh... Um... Should we..."

"I could read it out loud, if you would like."

Both Amina and Petra gazed at her curiously. "You would do that?"

Sakura shrugged and her smile widened, as if that was possible. "I trust you both."

"Thank you... We would like to listen."

She cleared her throat and began, "Dear Sakura, we finally found someone who was able to take this letter to you. Eren, Armin, and I are stationed in the fields right now, growing crops. The work is hard, but they give us food and a place to sleep, which is more than most people get so for that we're grateful. Armin's grandfather along with most of the people were sent to retake Wall Maria just a month ago, and we know that you would've been there since anyone older than eighteen was ordered to go. It's also a good thing that you applied last year, because now the cutoff age for the military this summer is twenty, so you wouldn't have made it.

"I have been looking after Armin and Eren as much as I could, but it's hard. So thank you for looking after us. We miss you a lot, but we know this is necessary. Eren still says that we're going to see you next year because we're going to join the Trainee Corps, but I'm still not sure yet. I do know that I don't want to continue working in the farms.

"We don't know when this letter will reach you, but just in case, happy birthday. We promise to give you an extra big hug... next time we see you. Love, Mikasa, Eren, and Armin..."

The only sound in the room was the _click _of the scissors, because Sakura was definitely _not _crying.

* * *

_Have you ever thought that most of the things that happened are your fault? They are. Helsa takes you in and is murdered. We take you in, and my parents are murdered. The Jaegers take you in, and look what has become of Eren. Look where we are now, working to death in a field. See the pattern? Good, because you're not the only one that notices things. You call yourself a _iryo-nin_, but how many lives have you saved? A _kunoichi, _yes? But how many lives have you taken to protect us?_

_We're next, and like always, you're going to be the one to survive.  
_

_Some kind of winner you are._

* * *

**The italicized section were Sakura's nightmares, from the POV of three different characters: Bertha, Kalura, and Mikasa. In her nightmares they were speaking directly to her, but no, they never actually had these conversations. This is different from the italicized section in the first chapter because then it was centered, this one has the same outline as the rest of the chapter. There's a reason for that. **

**I had to go on a bit of a scavenger hunt for Olou and Petra's beginnings. So far, the only thing I could find was that Olou's age in the manga was 19 (yes, I know, very shocking) and that they weren't in the Survey Corps when the Colossal Titan broke down Wall Maria in 845. But since they were in the Special Operations Squad, that meant they had a bit of experience which is why I lumped them in the 102nd Trainee Class. Also I upped their ages a bit because why not.**

**This chapter was certainly more on the angsty side, but it also had its bright side, kinda like life, eh? Besides, it's really not SnK without a dose of angst and three drops of vengeance. Things don't get any brighter from here though. Also, for now I'll take a break from the SnK plot and develop characters and the setting bit more. Even when we hit the original plot, I still won't stick closely to it, because it's boring to just quote lines or scenes from the manga/anime.**

**My innumerable thanks to OnePiecefan202, Basia Orci, RefleR, slw923, LadyRidger, deedee2034, catxangel, Latin Gardenia, pepergirl001, Atsirk Enoh, DragFire, Arisu-kun, mun3litKnight, ,brokenmaelstrom, foraslanthelion, necrofantasia, bum reviews, animagirl, PinKrystal, Guest, and DarkKoi for taking some time out of their days and reviewing. Thank you to those who added this story to their alerts as well. ****And to answer your question, RefleR, because I want to and can. But don't worry, because though it will play a role in the future, that is not the main focus of this story, at all.**

**Reviews make me happy.**

**Penpal**


	5. Fake

Reading guide for this chapter:

"Normal Talk."

"_Japanese."_

_"****__Jutsu"_

_"_**Emphasis."**

* * *

She was ready for the final test that would determine their rankings for their second year. After all, even last year when she had been horribly sick the day testing took place ––to the point that she could barely breathe because her nose was stuffed and she couldn't balance because she kept sneezing all the time–– she had managed to place fourth, just below Olou and Petra and one spot above Jett.

This year, though, things were going to be different. It was now second nature to be up in the air with her 3DMG and she had greater strength and stamina than most of the cadets, bar some buffer male trainees. Her swordsmanship had improved from holding the swords awkwardly (though it had felt just _right _if only the blades were a bit shorter and throwable) to having a graceful form even midair.

The last test exercise was simple: land as many hits as possible in the wooden titan course. At the moment, it didn't matter where, even if the spot usually killed a regular cadet, because they were practicing how to successfully mix the 3DMG with attacking. It was uncomfortable, slashing anything meanwhile they were almost ten meters above ground and being held only by two wires. It was a combination of trust and instinct, something many lacked.

Olou was currently up, using every single tree to his advantage and moving from titan to titan with astonishing speed. If there was anybody who made a suitable rival in her class, it was definitely Olou. His form, strength, and ambition evenly matched hers. Sakura had begrudgingly admitted a few months ago that maybe they were friends, much to Jett and Petra's delight, and Amina's amusement.

In the end, he landed a grand total of fourteen hits out of twenty possible, the class record. Emil nodded gruffly towards Olou and wrote something on a notepad, most likely a commentary of the performance as well as the grade. Now that they were second-years, it would include a comparison to last year's test as well as possible areas to improve on.

He walked smugly back to her, a stupid smirk plastered on his face. Sakura and the rest of the Trainees Corps Class were already used to his cocky demeanor, and there was nothing anyone could do about it other than resent him for it because he was _that _good.

"Did you see that? Oh, of course you did. Who didn't?" Petra smacked him in the back of the head and scowled at him when he yelped. "Ow! Petra! What was that for?"

"What have we said about humility?"

"That it's for the talentless? Ow! Stop it!"

Emil had decided to change things up and go from descending to ascending order based on last names. He called another cadet, who gave an impressive performance, and another, who only managed to land three hits, and another cadet, who lost a blade mid-flight, _and _Olou and Petra still kept bickering. It got to the point that both Jett and her teamed up to attract their attention, but it still didn't work. Sakura was about to smack them both in the head when she heard her last name coming from Emil.

_That _shut them up. In fact, there was a pervasive silence spread throughout the Trainees Corps Class. Everyone knew she was socially distant because she trained heavily, though the reason was a mystery because she had not expressed a keen desire in joining the Military Police. She barely had time for relationships and only confided in her roommates, Amina and Petra. Things had changed after the first year, though. Her eyes had become a bit lighter and she seemed to smile more often, which made her more amiable to the crowd, but her closest friends just grew more worried as her demeanor became brighter.

She sent a hook to a tree and landed gently in a giant branch next to Emil Ernst. "Land as many hits as you can. If you miss a titan, you can't go back, so I suggest you be careful about things."

Sakura nodded firmly and analyzed her surroundings, looking for the nearest titan. Emil blew the whistle, leaving her sensitive ears ringing, and she aimed her grappling hook to a tree a couple of meters away and was off.

It started out somewhat shaky. The experience was different, because she was used to fighting in the ground her whole life. Being up in the air was _too _much freedom. She missed hitting the first titan, and she barely managed to land a hit on the second one, only to be so distracted that she almost crashed into the other one. Sakura cursed under her breath in her native tongue and hastily attempted to regain her balance at the expense of hitting the fourth one.

She could almost _feel _Olou's smug grin.

Her grip on the handles tightened and she grit her teeth. She had hit one and missed three, not good considering that Olou had missed all of his in the last five. If he beat her in this test, he would take the number one spot and remind her that she wasn't ready yet, wasn't strong enough to protect Mikasa, Eren, and Armin by herself. Chakra was _very _useful, yes, but when fighting titans, she _needed _the 3DMG and blades to slice the nape quickly and efficiently. Punching things solved half her problems; hacking solved the other.

After slashing a tendon, she went up a couple of feet and started landing hits on the arms and torsos of the ten-meter classes but unfortunately missed two when she gained height in between titans, upping her count to eleven hits and five misses. At this point she couldn't miss another titan if she wanted to beat Olou and steal first place from the previous year's valedictorian, a twenty-two-year-old named Lars Kristof, who wasn't going to be valedictorian this year from their performance.

She landed a hit on its forehead but missed the sudden switch from ten-meter to four meter class and couldn't even nick the wood. Her stomach filled with dread and she cursed in Japanese. Had Eren been in its clutches, he would've been eaten. Not only that, but these wooden titans didn't move at all... This was nothing compared to the real world, and she was failing.

She broke two blades with the next titan, mostly because of her chakra-enhanced strength that had seeped through in her failure to control her anger and frustration. She sent her hook to a tree trunk and added the blades to the handles while she balanced herself on the trunk. There was one titan left that she had to hit in order to tie with Olou. Her time was around his, since both had sped through the course at the expense of accuracy, but there was only something that she could do and that was to show better mastery of her swordsmanship skills than Olou.

Stopping had broken her tempo, but at least she could calculate how high she would need to go in order to hit the nape of that twelve-meter class. She calculated how high she needed to go and sent her grappling hook to a tree around ten meters away and released the gas in her 3DMG, speeding towards the titan faster than usual to make up for lost time.

It was only when she was a couple of meters away that she realized she miscalculated how high she needed to be and was over by just half a meter, but far away enough that her blades would definitely miss the target.

Her chakra got the better of her and suddenly she wanted to try something new. There were no repercussions in the secret department, since Emil Ernst was keeping his distance and her classmates were many kilometers away. She retrieved the wires from the tree they were attached to and she was falling, but she still wasn't going to be able to hit the wooden titan. But what her mind didn't remember her body sure did, because she slashed the blade midair and a gust of wind was released from a blade in a neat arc that hit the nape of the titan a bit shallowly, surely not enough to kill it, but the wind had nicked it enough to make it seem as if she had narrowly hit it.

She released the grappling hook to another tree and released gas to speed towards it, landing on a branch gently. Sakura released a deep breath she hadn't realized she had been holding in and stared at her left-hand sword, bewildered. So not only did she shoot torrents of water from her mouth, but she could also release wind from her blades? Just what the hell could she do?

"_**Shinkuken.**" _That was the name of the technique she had used, even if she wasn't completely sure of how she knew the technique or where it had come from, but her arms and her chakra remembered releasing it various times. She grit her teeth and clenched her hands around the grip of her swords; so if her body remembered, why couldn't she?

"Ackerman!"

Emil Ernst's voice snapped her from her musings and she resisted the urge to smack her forehead. She was supposed to come back, yeah, to mark the end of the training. Now Emil would think she had taken longer and cheated, and that wasn't good at all.

He landed lightly next to her and eyed the titan critically, and then his eyes widened. "I saw that wild move you did but didn't think you managed to hit the titan. Then you disappeared and I thought the worst."

Sakura wiped her brow, eyeing her sweat with a little distaste. "I am fine, sir."

Emil studied her intensely. "You hit it in the nape. Granted, you need two slashes to kill one of these fuckers, but still... We haven't practiced that. You have impressed me. Good job, Ackerman."

That was the first "good job" anyone received from Emil Ernst, and she felt incredibly guilty that she only received it with the help of her chakra.

But she would be lying if she said she would refrain from honing that skill. Who knows, it might be useful one day when she was alone and one of those ugly shits was in the way between her and her survival.

* * *

Petra slammed the her clothes trunk and sat on it, heaving a long sigh. The eighteen-year-old stared at her pink-haired roommate, who was sprawled in her bed rereading the letter her sister had sent her for like the eighth time. It was only when she was reading one of Mikasa's letters that Petra saw Sakura smile in true happiness, as if she was transported to a better, happier world.

"I think I'm going to visit them," Sakura suddenly declared, sitting up and looking down from her topmost bunk bed. "I couldn't go last time because I didn't have any money, but I saved some from all the work I did last summer and I think I have enough to buy my way into a cart."

Petra frowned. "I thought you relaxed last summer."

Sakura smiled sheepishly and shrugged, though she didn't seem embarrassed from lying to her about what she did last summer. Petra had invited her to spend her time with her and her dad in their home in Honig. Her father had been looking forward to meeting the famous Sakura, from whom he had heard nothing but good things in Petra's letters. She had declined, stating that the year had burned her out and she wanted to do nothing but unwind, but she obviously hadn't done that, and she apparently didn't feel remorse for lying to her.

She had to admit she felt a little hurt and betrayed but she pushed it down, thinking about all the good things Sakura had done compared to the bad ones. Besides, it's not like she had done anything bad; she had done something quite noble, in a way. But the hurt mostly came from the lie. Why had she kept the truth from her, especially when it was something as selfless as that?

"I still think it's a bit dangerous to buy a trip from a stranger."

Sakura raised a pink eyebrow at her. "I'm not exactly someone you can easily take advantage of."

Petra resisted the urge to roll her eyes. She hated it when she got like this. "Sakura, we have one month off. Why don't you come with me to Honig, we get you a horse all for yourself, you come back to Honig with the horse, and we return back to camp together? It's much safer that way."

The twenty-one-year-old frowned, her eyes pensive. Petra knew she had given her a good offer, especially when she mentioned giving Sakura a horse all for herself. That was a luxury not many had, but the independence was desired by almost everyone. The class's valedictorian needed it the most considering the farm her siblings were located in was far ways off from the nearest city of commerce, where those carts usually dropped travelers. She would either need to hitch another ride or, worse, walk all the way to the farm.

"Sounds good, but why are you so into making me come with you to Honig?"

"Is it so wrong that I want to take my best friend along with me to my hometown?"

Sakura recoiled and blinked slightly, her gaze bewildered. "You consider me your best friend?"

Now Petra really did roll her eyes. She glared at her and crossed her arms, suddenly irritated. "Seriously? You're asking me that after spending two years in this hell? What's wrong with you?"

She blushed slightly and looked down, a bit ashamed. "I'm sorry... I just didn't think––"

"Stop thinking and start feeling." Sakura snapped her head towards her, confused and at the same time fascinated. Petra added a bit hesitantly, "Not everyone in this world is against you."

Her mouth opened slightly and she swallowed a lump that had formed in her throat. The pink-haired woman looked away, ending the conversation, and Petra stood up and finished packing her things to her other smaller trunk.

"I'll go with you," she whispered.

Petra twirled towards her and was surprised to see slightly teary eyes. Knowing better than to question anything, she smiled warmly and softly said, "That's the right answer."

* * *

The ride to Honig had only taken a day, since their training camp was located in the center between Maria and Sina. Summer was nice, not too cold but not too hot, the perfect temperature. That combined with the beautiful mountains made the ride one of the most relaxed, beautiful journeys Sakura had ever embarked in, and she had had many compared to the average citizen, though perhaps not for the best reasons: she had traveled from the Ackermans' home to the Jaegers', then to the refugee place and finally to the 102nd Trainee Corps camp.

They entered the city, and it was just like how Petra described and more. There was a very noticeable _stench _which occurred when too many people lived too close together, but other than that the city was bustling with more energy than even Shiganshina. The overall demeanor was a bit rougher, if the expressions on the citizens were anything, but it was definitely understandable, considering what happened two years ago.

"Ah, it's good to be back," Petra murmured contentedly.

"Why do you say so?"

"My dad is moving to the Karanase District this year. He says business is better there, but I'm not too sure."

Something was bothering Sakura, and she decided to ask before she said something wrong later on. "Um, Petra...Why don't you talk about your mother?"

Her amber eyes saddened a bit and she smiled sadly. "She died ten years ago from an illness... I don't like being reminded of that."

"Oh." She remembered Hesla, Mikoto, and Kalura, all of them with their special warmth and legacies that had been passed on to her. They entrusted her with so much in such a short time frame, something that made them _mothers_ to her in their own way. "Losing a mother is always hard."

Petra looked at her sympathetically. "You lost your mom too?"

Sakura nodded, refraining from telling her exactly how many times. "But we shouldn't talk too much about that. We're visiting your dad, right? It's a happy occasion!"

She looked momentarily surprised but then she smiled widely and nodded along with her. Just then the cart came to a stop and the driver told them they reached their destination. Petra thanked him and paid him his money and they were soon on the way, Petra roaming the streets with expertise and Sakura following behind helplessly.

The eighteen-year-old stopped in front of a nice, well-kept home that reminded her a lot of the Jaegers' home, making her assume that Petra's barber shop made more than what she had previously let her know.

Petra knocked a couple of times and waited impatiently for her dad to open the door. The door opened slowly and revealed a man that was quickly tackled by his overly-excited daughter. The man laughed heartily and lifted off her feet with a bit too much effort.

"Oh, wow, Petra! You sure have gotten heavy!"

"Dad!"

Mr. Ral put his daughter down and looked at Sakura for a second before offering her a warm smile and an extended hand, which she eagerly took. He had his daughter's honeyed hair and light blue eyes, meaning Petra had her mother's eyes. His forehead and the corners of his mouth had wrinkles, possibly betraying his youthfulness.

"Hello, you must be Sakura, correct? My name is Philip Ral, very pleased to meet Petra's dear friend."

Sakura let his hand go and smiled warmly at the older man. "The pleasure is all mine, Mr. Ral."

"Oh, please, you kids calling me Mr. Ral sure makes me feel old. Please, call me Philipp."

"Very well, Mr. Philipp."

Petra and her father shared a look at her stubbornness but they only shrugged and later laughed. Even though Sakura was the source of their mirth, she felt absolutely happy with it, glad to have been included so easily and naturally into their routine.

They were just in time for dinner, and Philipp cooked for them one of the most delicious steaks she had ever tasted, which were few but still, it was very good. Philipp asked about how things had gone this year and Petra boasted about her fourth rank and Sakura meekly admitted that she had placed first. The dinner was jovial, since they shared countless stories of their time in camp and of their friends, particularly Olou. Petra whined about how much he had to baby him and Sakura complained about his cockiness, but they both grudgingly admitted he was one of their closest friends.

The house only had two rooms, which meant that Sakura and Petra had to share room, much to their _distaste_. With the knowledge that they didn't have to wake up at the crack of dawn's ass, the girls spent the whole night giggling and talking about silly things. Petra admitted her crush towards Jett and Sakura replied in a deadpan that she had known for a _long _time and that Petra did a shitty job hiding it.

To say Petra was mortified was an understatement, but the night overall was very enjoyable and Sakura had never felt so free and relaxed before in her life. Maybe she should've let Petra in much earlier to save herself much of last year's grief.

* * *

"Are you sure you know where you're going?"

Sakura gave her an exasperated look. "Yes, _Mom_, I checked like ten times and confirmed the existence of the farm."

Petra raised her hands in a placating manner. "All right, all right, I just wanted to make sure you didn't get lost. It'll take you like two days to get there, but you should be fine."

"I'll be back in two weeks, hopefully. Even if I'm not back you go on ahead, okay?"

"Saying that doesn't really assuage my worries."

"Oh, wow, look at you using big words."

"Shut up and stop trying to distract me, Sakura! It's not working."

Sakura laughed and her horse whinnied loudly and started moving around. "Ho, ho. You sure this animal won't just drop me?"

Petra glared at her and harrumphed. "You're the one that rented her."

Her clutch on the reins tightened and she nodded in agreement. "True, true. Well, I better be off if I want to make it halfway by dusk. See you later, Petra!"

"Good luck and I hope you have a safe trip!"

"Thanks!"

The kunoichi nudged the horse's sides with her foot and the horse was off. She had to admit it had taken her a couple of days to get used to riding, but both Philipp and Petra were good teachers and she had gotten the hang of it. Sure, she couldn't do anything but stay on top of the horse and she could remain balanced even with a harsh trot, but that was it.

Regardless of her mild incapability to ride, her horse was powerful and good. She sure needed to thank the Rals when she came back for giving her such a beauty and finding her at such an affordable price. Not only that, but Petra had lent her some riding clothes, because there was no way in hell she was riding with a skirt. Thus she had been given a pair of pants and boots, a long-sleeved shirt and a cloak just in case it rained. She had two sets of clothes and a pair of pajamas in her bag along with the presents she brought Eren, Mikasa, and Armin.

She bought them with the leftover money she had, and now she wasn't sure she had enough to pay for food for the next two weeks, but she wasn't too worried about that. She couldn't help but be excited to give Eren one of the Survey Corps cloaks she had borrowed –– read, _stolen–– _from one of the training camps leftover clothes. She bought Armin a book about exploration which would've been worth a fortune had it not been talking about exploring the _outside _world. It was in the banned book sections in one of the bookstores, and people had eyed her suspiciously for buying it, but she couldn't care less because Armin would be happy to receive this.

Mikasa's gift had been difficult, which brought upon a bout of nostalgia considering she had been in this position around four years ago. In the end she had decided to buy her a plain necklace with a simple oval pendant but asked a seasoned blacksmith to inscribe the kanji for her name on it and the kanji for her mother's name in the back. She wanted to complete the present by buying her three bamboo hats, her namesake, but unfortunately bamboo apparently didn't exist anywhere near them. However, she still contended the necklace would brighten her enough, even if Eren's red scarf hid it.

The more Sakura rode, the more experience she gained from it. There was a point when the horse surpassed her chakra-enhanced speed, which was quite the feat. However they had to rest a lot and the horse was very demanding of water, but she had a good reason considering they were riding hard.

Sakura stopped in a small town which barely had two hundred people. The perk of stopping in such a desolate town was that the inn was dirt cheap, even if the service wasn't great. Still, Sakura couldn't really complain considering she had a bed and had breakfast guaranteed and that was all she needed.

She was about to fall asleep when she heard the frantic neighs of her horse outside. Sakura thanked her laziness for not switching into her pajamas and hurriedly put on her boots, scampering outside to make sure her partner was fine.

The kunoichi groaned when she saw three men trying to steal her horse. She should've seen it coming, she really should've been more aware of the dangers of journeying, but she had been lulled into a false sense of security because of this rundown town. Maybe that's how they made ends meet, by stealing from the odd traveler that came their way. Her pride as a kunoichi was wounded, and she had to see the situation rectified.

Sakura cleared her throat and the three men stopped at their tracks. "You have a lot of gall trying to steal from a sleeping person."

"Look, girl, just go back to your room and we promise to not kill you."

She snorted, thinking it was cute that these men were threatening her. "Look, I'm feeling merciful today. Leave right now and I won't pursue you."

Her enhanced eyesight allowed her to see one of the men take out a firearm and aim at her. "Look, bitch, our patience is running so unless you want to have your brains plastered on the wall, I suggest you let us go."

"Your first incorrect assumption was that you would get to fire."

Before even waiting for their reply she launched herself at them, using chakra to amplify her speed. The men stood no chance against her and she quickly disarmed them, perhaps throwing a mild kick or punch here and there that left them incapacitated. They let the horse go and she sped away, quickly leaving the small town and her master. Sakura scowled at her coward horse and promised to give her quite the talk once she found her.

Four more chakra signatures got nearer to her and she realized a bit too late that she was surrounded from both sides. Two men closed in from one side of the road and the other two from the side where her horse had escaped to. The bandits she had taken down where groaning on the floor, one of them clutching his privates. The other four accomplices wordlessly aimed their firearms at her.

They started shooting at her, but they only shot at a puff of smoke. Sakura's body flicker technique had been a bit rusty the first time she used it, but training so many times in the mountain by the camp had honed her skills to the point that it looked as if she teleported to another place. She was now on the roofs, staring at the men as her mind formulated a plan. She herself was in no particular danger, but that didn't mean the townspeople weren't. Even if she had her suspicions that the town itself was behind the robbery, she still didn't want to be wrong and unnecessarily cause someone's death.

However, she wasn't fast enough to disarm both sides of bandits, since they were very far away from each other and although she could take care of that issue by simply killing them, she didn't want to spill any blood that night.

_Bird_... her body whispered and her hands unwillingly made the seals. _Hare... Horse... _She body flickered behind the bandits by the town's exit and completed the hand seals with _Ram_. "_**Futon: Kyoryokuna Fuha.**" _She breathed in and expelled a great gust of wind from her mouth, blowing the bandits and making them crash on the ground several meters away. It would take them several minutes to recover from such a crippling hit, and by then they might be in shackles and she very far away.

She gathered her things from her room and set out in search of her mode of transportation. Looking for the chakra signature of a specific animal was hard, but looking for the chakra of a specific species wasn't; for example, flies didn't have the same amount of chakra as horses did. Since not many horses wandered around in the wilderness at these hours of the night, it was very easy to spot her white mare grazing in a nearby field.

She approached her slowly lest she scare her. Luckily the mare seemed to remember her, because she didn't bolt or try to attack her. Sakura sighed and started running her fingers through her mane, trying to calm her down. "_What a troublesome night, right?" _she spoke to her softly in her native tongue. "_I don't get to speak this language very often anymore... In fact, there are times I catch myself thinking in German and I don't have to translate what I have to say in my mind. It should make me happy, but for some reason I think that I'm getting farther away from who I am... No, who I _**used** _be. Is that bad?_"

She chuckled softly to herself and started patting the rest of her body. "_Ah, and here I am, talking to a horse. You know, I thought I wasn't going to name you because I wasn't going to see you very often, but I've grown fond of you. And since I am speaking to you in my native tongue, it's only fitting that I name you in Japanese, right? Well, you're mostly white, though you have some dirt here and there, but you're still mostly white. So I guess I'll call you White from now on, okay? I guess I'm no better than Olou and that brat I saved in Beinn."_

Shiro's heartbeat started slowing down after Sakura's ministrations and she relaxed enough to allow her to mount her again. Getting on Shiro was hard to do in public, mostly because she was _almost _five-foot-two, but out here in the wild she had no qualms about using chakra as a little boost. She nudged Shiro to start walking and luckily she obeyed, albeit a bit slowly. It was okay, though; she was in no rush at the moment.

She had paid a grand total of three gold coins for the dinner, stay, and breakfast at the inn, and she only had the dinner. It aggravated her greatly that she had spent so much money and hadn't even reaped all the benefits. Still, she couldn't have stayed. Luckily it was dark enough for the bandits to miss the color of her hair, but they might recognize her voice, and she didn't feel like becoming a scapegoat for humanity just yet.

Her mare's speed continued slowing down, something Sakura had predicted considering they had ridden for almost ten hours. However, she had to be picky with the area she chose, because if a town was dangerous, there's no saying how risky being out in the open was.

"_You know, one of the ninja arts is the Illusionary Techniques. If I could only remember one, I'm sure I wouldn't be so worried. Maybe it's because I didn't know one before I lost my memory? But that's weird, since I have good chakra control and I know Illusionary Techniques require good chakra control. Maybe I ran out of 'You Get A Free Jutsu' cards for the month, eh? Oh, well, look at that, there's a hill over there. We can rest at the bottom, since it's a bit far away from the road. Come, White!"_

The hill was small, which was a small blessing because she wasn't sure she would be able to handle riding a horse down a mount or anything bigger than that. She got off from Shiro and started relaxing her again, coating her fingertips with a bit of chakra to make the desired effect faster. In a couple of minutes the mare relaxed fully and dropped to the ground, falling asleep shortly afterwards. Sakura couldn't contain her drowsiness any longer and laid her head against Shiro's belly and descended into a light sleep.

* * *

_"How do you get animals to like you so much."_

_"I don't understand the question. Animals love you."_

_"Well, yeah, but that was only after Kurama let me sign the contract with the kitsune that animals started paying attention to me. It took _two _contracts for them to like me that much."_

_"Well, there's your answer."_

_"What?! Sakura-chan? When––"_

_"Come on, Shishou wanted to see us, Naru––"_

* * *

She was cranky and tired, but there was no one to blame for her state except the thugs that had made her flee the town. There were times when she wanted to get off Shiro and start punching the earth, but since she was so close to her destination, she didn't really want to put her identity in danger. Besides, she was making record time considering she barely slept at all and only waited for her mare to recover her strength, trying to remember what she had dreamt about in the meantime. They had been on their way before sunrise.

The map the Rals had given her was a bit old, but she found her way again after asking a passerby tinker. Apparently she was only thirty minutes away, and that was great because she had missed breakfast. Her stomach was growling and Shiro's pace was slowing down, no doubt hungry and tired from the arduous work she had put her through.

"_Don't worry, White. We'll be there soon and I promise to give you half my food for being such a good girl."_

They reached the farm in forty minutes, but she was only happy to see that the place existed to begin with. People were working on the fields intensively, ploughing the land or watering new crops or checking how the vegetables were growing. These farms provided food for most of the residents inside Wall Rose as well as the cadets. Sakura felt immensely grateful for them, because if it weren't for their hard work,, she might not have a warm stew waiting for her at the cabin after a hard day of work.

An short woman approached her. Her dark eyes were wary and her face was marred by harsh lines, no doubt scars from age. "What are you doing here?"

"I came to visit my siblings."

"No visitors in working hours. We can't afford distractions."

She glared at the woman, and Sakura was inwardly happy to be mounted on a horse because it made her much more intimidating. "Look, I rode her for almost two days straight and I want to see my siblings. I'm not in a good mood, I didn't get much sleep, and it will make me feel **much** better if I get to talk to them. I don't want to be mad."_  
_

"Still, no distractions. So unless you work here on your stay, I don't see why I should let you see your siblings."

"Feed me and my horse and I'll work here for as long as I can."

The woman raised her eyebrows and then pointed at Shiro. "How much does it eat?"

"Two humans' worth."

"Then your work better be worth three persons' or this deal won't work."

Sakura raised her head haughtily and smirked slowly at the woman. "I'm worth more than that."

The woman scoffed but Sakura knew she had taken the bait. "Well if you're lying I'll just kick you both out. The stable is that way and you'll find tools in that big house over there. You can search for your siblings afterwards."

The pink-haired girl nodded and rode Shiro to the stable. Most of the horses there were old and thin, a sharp contrast of the strong mare that had carried her for two days. She dismounted once she reached the entrance of the building and led Shiro to an empty stall near the end. She grabbed the bag with presents and removed the saddle, throwing it outside of the stall, where it wasn't so dirty. Then she gathered the hay and filled the bucket with water, and Shiro paid attention to Sakura no longer.

She chuckled. "You sure are hungry, right? I'll come check on you tonight. Be good." She closed the stall door and left, glad to be away from the awful smell of horse poop.

If she hadn't spent two years with the Ackermans' she would've been clueless as to what to do with the tools in the storage house. She just grabbed a hoe and left, because it wasn't as if she was going to do any work at the moment anyway.

Even though she had memorized their chakra signature, it was a bit hard to pinpoint their exact location when they were so close and so many people where gathered around. She knew they were close by, though, and it wouldn't take long for them to spot her with her pink hair. Still, she wanted to surprise them, because she hadn't let them know she was coming, and the only way to do that was to remain hidden.

It wasn't hard for a kunoichi to remain hidden.

Most of the kids were working on seeding the fields, simply because it was an important work that didn't require much muscle. She spotted them almost immediately, and she was glad to see them together even after all this time. They were engrossed in their work, which was excellent since it allowed her to sneak behind them without the use of any of her kunoichi abilities.

"Oh, wow, in a year or two you're going to be taller than me." The three children stiffened immediately and Sakura repressed a giggle. "Except you, Armin. It might take you a bit longer but I'm sure you'll get there."

The three turned around and stared at the kunoichi, wide-eyed and open-mouthed, and now Sakura did burst out laughing. The kids snapped out of their stupor and tackled her immediately, Armin hugging her left side, Eren her right, and Mikasa the front. Her chuckles were warm and she ruffled their heads affectionately, especially Armin's, who was now much more comfortable in her presence.

"We didn't know you were coming," Mikasa whispered, her face still buried in the crook of her neck.

Sakura placed a gentle kiss on her forehead. "That was the point of the surprise, dear sister. Now let's get out of here and lead me to your rooms. I have things for you."

Sneaking from their work wasn't hard, considering the sheer amount of people in the fields. Sakura had expected them to protest, but she was glad her wards appreciated her more than labor.

All the children shared the same quarters, meanwhile men and women had different dormitories. Sakura suspected she would be lumped with the adults, but she had her ways of escaping undetected. After all, she worked all last summer and traveled with little sleep for almost two days just so that she could spend some measly days with her dependents.

She sat at the edge of Eren's small bed and the other three crowded around her, eagerly waiting for her next to move. "Before we continue, I have gifts for you three." Sakura reached into her bag and got out an old book, which Armin almost snatched from her hands, much to her amusement. He opened to book immediately and started scanning the pages, his eyes gaining a new light at the pictures. "I don't know how true those are, and don't ask me about the validity because I don't know who the author is, but––"

"It's awesome, Sakura," Armin interrupted in an awed voice. His normally cautious blue eyes were bursting with happiness. "Thank you so much."

"You're very welcome." She got out the Survey Corps cloak and handed it to Eren. He took it from her slowly, reverently, and admired the Wings of Freedom in the back. "Say it's from a deceased family member because I stole it."

Eren grinned at her and immediately put on the cloak, flourishing it dramatically for them to see. It pained Sakura to say it, but the Wings of Freedom suited him, as much as she wanted to keep him safe inside the walls. "This is the best gift, Sakura. Even when I get my own, I won't replace this one."

She grinned and searched for the last present. It took a bit of rummaging around because the necklace was small, but once she felt the cool metal she quickly grasped it and handed it to her surrogate sister. Mikasa traced the kanji lines, as if familiarizing herself with them again. "Mikasa," she whispered, her gray eyes widening and her mouth forming a small smile at the detail.

"Look at the back."

The girl turned the necklace around and studied the kanji. "Life...? No... **Mikoto**... You missed something, though. _Cherry blossom._"

Sakura's eyes softened and her heart clenched slightly. She thought the kids were going to resent her for being away from them so long, for not fully carrying out her promise to provide and keep them safe, but she was glad they were so understanding and open. Her promise to protect them kept her alive, gave her life meaning beyond survival. Should they reject her...

She didn't want to think about it.

Armin and Eren were understandably confused, but they didn't seem to mind being out of the loop. Sakura cleared her throat and turned their attention to them, though her wandering eye noticed Mikasa trying to put on the necklace by herself and failing miserably. She chuckled and helped her out and was elated to see that the necklace rested on top of her red scarf, not hidden by it.

"Tell me, how has your day been?"

The four started exchanging stories, talking about everything and nothing at the same time. The pre-teens complained about the hard work and the treatment they received, but at the same time they were glad they received food and shelter, something most didn't have at the moment. However, they were more interested in what Sakura had been doing, particularly Eren. She told them almost everything about camp, how physically demanding it was (and she asked them if they had been training and much to her surprise they nodded firmly) and how many talented people there were.

"But you're ranked highly, right?" Eren asked in a hopeful voice.

Sakura smirked, not at all humble in front of her wards. "I'm first, actually."

That changed the whole mood of the conversation, especially from Eren's part. He wanted to know _everything_, all the tricks, all the obstacles, all the requirements. His determination was admirable, but Sakura only felt more and more apprehension at this. Eren and Armin were currently arguing about the best time to switch to 3DMG fighting when Sakura interrupted them.

"Hey, guys... I've been thinking... Once I join the military, I'll get paid. I'm sure I can pull some strings to get all of us to Sina if I get in to the Military Police. You guys wouldn't have to join at all, we could all live comfortable lives, and we would never have to worry about losing each other ever again. What do you guys say? It sounds like a good life, right?"

Mikasa and Armin seemed to be considering the proposition, but Eren vehemently shook his head and tightened the Survey Corps' cloak around him. "Sorry, Sakura. I know you want to keep us safe, and I know you don't want to lose us, but we are not meant to live a comfortable life. Everything we owned, everything we were supposed to be, was taken away from us by the titans. I dream of killing titans, I want to breathe titan blood, I wish to cut titans down. My whole life revolves around titans, as despicable as it is. The only way I can be happy is by joining the Survey Corps."

If the other two had been considering her option, they were now in agreement with Eren's feelings. "I want to see the outside world," Armin admitted in a small voice. "Even at the cost of my life, I want to see what's outside these walls. I can't live inside any longer."

Sakura nodded slowly, slightly dejected and increasingly concerned. Her precious people were putting their lives in danger for the sake of revenge, exploration, and a will to protect, in Mikasa's case. "It was worth a shot," she said with a slight smile. Her wards stared at her with happiness and guilt, which just made her even more upset to cause them pain. "Well, let's go see how much you've been practicing! You three better not disappoint me!"

* * *

The next two weeks were considered the happiest after the Shiganshina attack. She had missed the three terribly, their antics, their determination, the history they shared. Not only that, but the three of them knew about her status as a kunoichi. Sakura had told Armin after being convinced by Eren that he was very trustworthy and just as deserving of knowing the truth. And indeed, Armin hadn't looked at her as nothing but an older sister ever since.

She showed them **_Futon: __Kyoryokuna Fuha_** and as much as she wanted to show them **_Shinkuken _**she couldn't because she lacked a sword. Nevertheless, they were very impressed and amazed and only asked more questions. The wonder didn't come from the ninjutsu's ability, because blowing gusts of wind wasn't going to do anything to a seven-meter-tall titan, but it was still very different and incredible.

Just to show that old woman, Sakura's work was truly worth three people's. Not only did she not grow tired, but she was so quick and efficient that she always finished first. She was such an asset that they even let her get away with a few things, like sleeping in the children's quarter to be close to her wards and even working side-by-side with them.

However, all good things came to an end, and soon it was time for Sakura to leave and finish her last year in the 102nd Trainee Corps Class. However, she had decided to not leave alone, and after convincing the old woman to part with a cart she was never going to use, she took the kids with her to Honig, an enlistment site for the 104th Trainee Corps Class. The trip was going to take four days instead of its usual five, but that was fine since Shiro was well-fed and Sakura still had a week off before they started again.

"I can't believe you convinced her to let us go," Armin said from his spot in the cart.

She wanted to turn around and look at them, but riding Shiro required her full attention, especially because she was carrying precious cargo in the back. "I have my ways. Not everyone is as pigheaded as you three."

Sakura took a different route, since she was still a bit wary of stopping in that sketchy town where she had been robbed. She ran many more risks with this decision, and one time they barely made it to an inn before it closed, but in the end it paid off and they reached Honig in record time. She returned Shiro to her rightful owner, a sad affair seeing that she had grown very fond of the mare, and sold the cart she had carried the kids in for a whooping twenty gold and thirty silver coins.

She took her little ducklings on different errands now that she had money. She first took them to enlist in the center of the town, much to their excitement and nervousness. The cart was going to leave to the 104th Trainee Corps camp in five days, at noon. Then she went to pay a room for five days and six nights at the inn, including breakfast and dinner, which drained her of most of her funds, but she still had ten gold to spend, not counting the money she had reserved for the ride back to her own camp.

"Well, I still have some money, so is there anything you guys want?"

"Can you buy us some ale?" Eren asked, a mischievous hint to his voice.

Sakura whacked the back of his head. "Just because you enlisted doesn't mean that you get to drink, you idiot."

"But we're men now! Well, men and woman!"

The kunoichi snorted. "Men? Woman? Eren, you three still blush when I say 'sex.'" She turned to them just when she finished the sentence and felt a surge of satisfaction when their cheeks turned red. It had been very satisfying to explain to them what sex was during their trip, because apparently many men around them had been complaining about how _they didn't get it in that often_. "See, you three are still giggling children."

"Why did you have to tell us that?" Eren moaned.

"I could've gone my life without knowing that," Armin continued, dismayed.

"I'll make sure to remind you that you said that when you're older, Armin," she muttered, feeling even giddier when his cheeks turned an even brighter shade of red.

"No need to be so cruel, Sakura," Mikasa murmured, still a bit flustered.

"Then don't ask to get drunk, brats. Ah, I almost forgot I have to let Petra know I'm back. C'mon, let me introduce you to our class's fourth best cadet."

* * *

They spent the next three days together, enjoying their time together because who knew when they were going to see each other again? However, soon it was the time for Sakura to leave to camp, though they made sure to not have any tearful good-byes.

"We'll see each other soon, okay?" Sakura promised, hugging each one of them tightly.

"Sakura... What branch are you joining?" Mikasa asked, clutching her necklace tightly.

She sighed and gazed at the blue sky. It was a beautiful day with no clouds and a mild temperature. There was no better day for traveling than this one. "You know, the world needs more Wings of Freedom flying in the sky." Getting the words out had been one of the hardest things in her life, because she was admitting defeat in trying to persuade them in joining the Military Police or not joining at all. But if she could not keep them out of danger, then she would have to do her very best in keeping them alive, and the only way to do that was by being by their side.

They smiled confidently at her, and they seemed genuinely happy in her choice.

"Then wait for us, okay?" Eren said with a grin. "No dying."

"I promise, no dying."

With one last hug, she left them at the inn's entrance and walked towards the Rals' house, where Petra was already waiting at the front. Her friend hugged her tightly, excited to see her again. "Ready for this?"

"Let's finish this year once and for all!"

* * *

**Futon: Kyoryokuna fuha: Wind Release: Powerful Wind Wave **

**Shinkuken: Vacuum Blade**

**Whee, the Training is over. Not gonna lie, I was kinda waiting for her to join the Survey Corps already but this was some necessary fluff.**

**Also, I promise there is a very good reason why a) Sakura remembers justu instead of memories in trigger-scenes and b) Sakura knows Futon and Suiton (though the second should be a bit obvious, but the explanation not as much). And no, just because she remembers more jutsu doesn't make her more powerful technically. Why? Besides Rasengan and other few special jutsu (like Shinkuken), most require hand seals She can't really perform ninjutsu when she's fighting titans because her hands are grabbing the handles that control the 3DMG ****(and it's impossible to use Rasengan with 3DMG as well).**. And as stated in Chapter Three, aerial fighting against multiple titans is a risky business because they're so unpredictable, fast, strong, and tall. There are other jutsu more useful but they won't appear for a while.

******Interesting tidbit about retrograde amnesia is that they forget explicit memory, but not implicit. That's because motor skills and instinctive physical memories are stored separately from explicit memories. The hippocampus initially processes both types, but explicit memories move to the ****cortex**, while implicit ones go to the **cerebellum.** Now it is my belief that spiritual chakra is stored in the cortex because it deals with experiences and understanding of jutsu meanwhile the physical part of chakra is stored in the cerebellum, explaining in more detail why Sakura remembers her fighting techniques but has forgotten her jutsu.

**A bit of a happier chapter to make up for last one, so yay for that. Also, I'm not sorry for the tease in the dream, or the tease that Sakura doesn't remember her dream. Whoops.**

**My immense gratitude to Basia Orci, pepergirl001, mun3litKnight, animagirl, PinKrystal, brokenmaelstrom, necrofantasia, Kitsukami, Lucia Tsukiyomi-hime, LadyRidger, LovingPillow, Guest, Guest, Guest, and Bum Reviews for being so awesome and leaving reviews. Also, immense thanks to those who added this story to their alerts and favorites!**

**Reviews are chocolate**

**Penpal**


	6. Offered Hearts

Jett, Olou, and Petra were ahead of her, but she didn't mind. Nape after nape, she was systematically slashing the wooden titans twice with such precision and force that she knew her first place in their graduating class was guaranteed even if she didn't finish first in the titan killing course. No, there was no need to worry about herself.

However, she _was _worried for her close friend, Amina. Last time she had ranked twenty-sixth in their class, which was quite impressive considering she had been in the lower tens in their first year. Still, she wished to join the Military Police, and if she didn't place in the top ten she would've been forced to join the Survey Corps or the Garrison, one for the glory of humanity with a high fatality rate and the other for a meager living guarding and repairing Wall Rose with namelessness. Neither were good enough for Amina.

Sakura risked looking behind her and inwardly cringed when she didn't see Amina even with her enhanced eyesight. That didn't bode well for her results, especially because Olou, Sakura, and Petra had bet her rank on her performance in this particular test. If she did badly in this one, she definitely wasn't going to make it to the top ten.

Perhaps they had set their expectations too high. They had done a great job, improving a bottom-class trainee to one in almost the top ten percent of their graduating class, but it was still not enough. Some people weren't made to be talented in some areas and excelled in others. Amina and her manipulating personality made it easy to get away with certain mishaps and mischief they had caused in their last year. She was shrewd, she was shameless, and Sakura was just happy to have her on her side as a friend, but none of that mattered in these tests.

She finished with a flourish, using a combination of excellent 3DMG skills and her own brand of intuition to let go of the wires, speed towards the nape, slash it viciously with her momentum, and quickly send the grappling hooks to another tree, all while making it seem as if she was flying gracefully in the air. She usually wasn't much for fanciness in the field, but this was her last time doing this in the Trainee Corps and she would be damned before she didn't leave a good impression of the Ackerman name.

Just like her sister, Mikasa Ackerman had been labeled a once-in-a-century prodigy in just a year and was famed to the point that there were whispers of her name in the 102nd Trainee Corps Class. Most people thought that their talent came from their shared blood, but nobody except Armin and Eren knew that they were adopted siblings, even if they looked nothing alike. Mikasa was brilliant because she was _that _good and had something to protect; Sakura was labeled a genius because she had chakra and a couple of years of fighting under her belt that her body ––but not her mind–– remembered.

Sakura sent the wires to the base of a tree and used gas to propel herself towards the ground. Emil Ernst gave her an approving nod from his position above in a thick branch, which made her feel slightly dejected. She still hadn't gotten another "good job" from the taciturn man, even after improving her skills to their limits. To think that without her chakra she was nothing made her feel a bit hollow in her chest.

"You're such a show off, Pinky."

"That's really rich coming from you, old man."

Petra sighed and shook her head. "C'mon guys, let's just go to the side and wait for Amina."

"And stop your bickering," Jett added with a grunt. "You're gonna be the cause of our deaths."

Both Sakura and Olou held back their words and settled for glaring at each other. Since they were the first ones to finish, they chose the spot to rest and wait for Amina to appear. Cadet after cadet finished, some landing gently meanwhile others roughly, but there was still no sign of Amina. She started to grow restless, no longer able to rest comfortably against the tree trunk.

"She will be fine," Petra said, but even she sounded unsure of herself.

The kunoichi stood up with a sigh, wiping her white pants from any excess dirt, and walked back to the finish line. She really didn't know why their uniforms had white pants. Not only did they get dirty, but it was such a risky business to hide a period with them. It was a good thing the uniform included a type of brown sash at the waist, possibly first designed to not stain the bottom of the pants when sitting down, but now acting as a lifesaver for female soldiers all around the three military branches.

Just when Sakura reached the finish line Amina appeared in front of her, fresh and completely relaxed. Emil Ernst gazed down at her impassively for the first few seconds before saying, "Excellent precision and ruthlessness. I expect high marks." With that he broke the eye contact and settled for observing the other trainees, but the effect of his words was instant: Amina grinned widely and Sakura hugged her ecstatically, accidentally lifting her in the air in her excitement.

The two girls made their way to their friends and shared the news, cheering Amina on. Rankings wouldn't come in another week, but if that wasn't an indication that Amina was going to make it to the top ten, they didn't know what would.

* * *

Sakura was woken up by vicious shaking and a pair of excited dark eyes. Still in the spell of sleep, she dully asked, "Amina... Why did you wake me up?"

"Rankings are up, silly. Let's go see!"

As if she had been doused in cold water, she spasmed into a sitting position and jumped from her top bunk bed to the floor, wasting no time in putting on her uniform. She noted the crossed swords with a certain air of sadness, because soon her uniform would be replaced with another one bearing a different insignia.

"Where's Petra?"

"She woke me up and left to get a head start. She said she would meet us outside."

The rankings had always been nailed close to the entrance of the mess hall cabin so that nobody would miss them. Sure enough, the cadets were congregated in one of cabin's walls, a telltale sign of where the parchment was. Sakura tried looking for Petra, but by now everyone was taller than her by more than a few inches, meaning that there was no way she could find Petra, who was also very short. She also lost Amina in the crowd, which also wasn't good.

"Olou!"

The twenty-year-old whipped his head, looking for the source of the voice and cringing when he found her. "Oh, hey, Pinky."

"What is it?" she asked, suddenly worried. That tone coupled with the expression on his face wasn't a good thing.

"Um, it's Amina... I think it's better if you see for yourself."

Her took her wrist and pushed and shoved his way through the crowd, earning quite a few glares and shouts which neither minded or paid attention to. After almost an eternity of fighting with their fellow classmates, they reached the front. Sakura spotted Amina standing in front of the parchment, unmoving, and her heart clenched in apprehension.

Sakura gently pried Olou's hand from her wrist and made her way next to Amina. Her gaze was empty, almost unseeing, but it seemed as if she was focusing on the rankings. Already fearing the worst, Sakura started reading the rankings. She was first, no surprise there, with Olou second, Petra third, and Jett fifth. She continued searching for Amina's name, and almost sighed in relief when she found it so close to Jett's.

"Amina Talman: Eleven... Fuck. I... Amina... I don't know what to say."

"I'm going to die," she whispered. If it weren't for her chakra hearing, she would've missed it, considering the clamor around them. Her eyes were tearing up, but there was a slight smile on her face. "I will die."

Sakura frowned and grabbed her arm, leading them away from the crowd. "You are ranked eleventh, Amina. Eleven out of two hundred thirty-eight. Some _died _in these last three years, but you survived. You won't _die__."_

She laughed quietly and the tears now spilled from her eyes. "No, you don't understand, Sakura. I'm going to die."

Now she was losing her patience. She was being overdramatic just because she wouldn't get to apply to the Military Police. _She _wasn't going to die; Mikasa, Eren, and Armin might. Amina was going to wear roses on her back, not the Wings of Freedom. It angered her that she was thinking of dying because she wasn't going to make it to the Military Police when there were others out there actually dying horrible deaths.

"Stop that. You're not dying."

She only continued crying. "You don't understand right now, but you will later on."

"Then make me understand." Giving her one last glare, she left Amina in the middle of the field.

"I will die next to you, Sakura."

* * *

Their graduation ceremony was that very night, where the top ten were announced and the Trainees were told when they would get to choose their military branch. Luckily, the Commander of the Survey Corps, Erwin Smith, and the Commander of their Section of the Garrison, Dot Pixis, were both nearby and free, meaning that they would receive their speeches persuading them to join their respective branches in one week, which was today.

Sakura avoided Amina all that time, incensed at her comment and reaction. So what if she was Eleven? So what if she wasn't going to live inside Wall Sina? There were worse scenarios in life, and the people that had the right to whine usually didn't. It wasn't that Sakura felt angry at Amina because of what happened to her in her own life, because that wasn't her fault, but she still didn't think she should cry about that.

The rest of their friends left their quarrel alone and instead pretended as if they weren't fighting, opting to not choose sides. Jett had already decided to join the Military Police, but Sakura had been surprised to learn that both Petra and Olou were having problems deciding. She still remembered Petra wished to move inside Wall Sina to get as far away from the titans as possible, but now wasn't completely convinced about her choice. Olou had been disillusioned in the Military Police after hearing rumors and evidence of the extent of their corruption, and now he wasn't so sure he wanted to be a part of that. It's not like Sakura had tried to convince either of them to join the Survey Corps, because she didn't want Petra or Olou to be in a dangerous situation, but she still found it interesting that they had changed so much in the last three years.

It's not like she hadn't changed.

They were a bit far away from the stage. Olou and Jett were talking about the most amount of time someone can go without using gas and maintaining a good speed meanwhile a stony silence prevailed in the three girls.

"Um, so, how's your night so far?" Petra tried with a small chuckle.

The kunoichi raised her eyebrows and gave her a look. "We've been together the whole day."

Now the nineteen-year-old glared at her, not appreciating her comment. "I know, but it sure has felt like we haven't been together this last week. Come on, Sakura, you're being childish."

"Me? Childish? I think you're accusing the wrong person of being childish, Petra."

"Not everyone is as good as you."

"I'm not asking anyone to be good as me."

"_Some _want to join the Military Police."

"And that's _great_, but we all have to deal with the cards we've been dealt with."

"You're being too harsh! Try having some sympathy!"

The two girls continued arguing, but Amina remained strangely quiet. She had been like that ever since she found out her ranking. Her gaze was almost empty and she was barely responsive, only acknowledging their statements if it had something to do with orders or food. Still, even if she was a barely functioning human being at the moment, she still stayed close to them.

"Attention! Trainees, gather near the stage!"

The girls frowned at each other but made their way to the front, and though their relationship was a bit tense at the moment, they still stood close to each other. The night was cold, even if it was summer, but the fire from the stage and the proximity of their bodies provided some warmth and much-needed light.

The cadets impatiently waited for Erwin Smith to appear, eager to get out of there. It was tradition to give the Survey Corps, the branch with the least recruits and soldiers, the first speech so that their audience was the greatest. The branch was incredibly small, with only three hundred soldiers, and the high mortality rate made it very hard to attract new cadets to join. This order of speech could make the difference from their normal twenty recruits to at least thirty-five, the highest they had ever received.

The 102nd Trainee Corps Class quieted immediately when a tall blond man appeared on the stage. The Wings of Freedom in his left breast pocket made her heart start beating wildly. His stance was imposing and regal, the perfect picture of a commander comfortable and suited for attention and responsibility. His icy blue eyes were studying the crowd with a certain fire Sakura hadn't seen in a soldier, not even in Emil Ernst, a former Survey Corps member.

"I am Erwin Smith, Commander of the Survey Corps. I am here to persuade you to join the Survey Corps." His eyes scanned the crowd, gauging their reactions for a second. "You all joined during the famine, a time of hardship for all of humanity. You all know that this was caused by none other than the titans. The titans took away around twenty percent of humanity, a staggering number with little comparison. Every misfortune you've had, every time you have felt distressed, every moment you've felt wanderlust, it can all be traced back to the existence of titans.

"For the last two years, we have been investing our efforts and lives in creating a route from Trost to Shiganshina to seal the hole and reclaim Wall Maria. It is an ambitious project, but it represents reclaiming back land that is rightfully ours. Next month we will go on an expedition, including this year's recruits to our journey. It will be our 28th, and we expect to claim back another kilometer of our land. In these last two years we have lost around thirty percent of our army. Thirty percent in just two years is a horrifying number. In this first expedition, we predict around thirty percent of you will not return. In the next two years, most of you will be dead. But the survivors... You will be experienced soldiers with a high survival rate."

He was quiet for a few moments, letting the statistics sink in. Sakura glared at the commander for making her heart beat so wildly. So this was what her wards were signing up for? This was the glory that Eren wanted? This was how they would die, mauled by titans when they had tried to escape from them three years ago? She didn't want this for them, she didn't want this for herself, she didn't want this for _anyone_. At least the man didn't lie to any of them; they all knew very well about the chances of their deaths.

As if sensing her glare, Erwin looked at her briefly, his eyes flashing slightly when he saw the hatred in her eyes. Feeling now was the opportune time, Erwin continued, "Knowing these discouraging figures, those willing to join, remain here. Ask yourselves, are you willing to offer your very own heart for the sake of humanity?" The crowd reacted immediately, murmurs erupting in their ranks. "That is all."

At first everyone stood very still, very quiet. Nobody wanted to be the first one to leave, but at the same time Sakura could feel their fear, how most of her class's chakra was in disarray. Jett cleared his throat, smiled at his friends slightly, and started leaving. As if a spell had been broken, the cadets started filing out, murmurs and whispers mingling with the sound of boots crunching the ground below them.

Sakura risked a glance to her right and was surprised to see Petra, Olou, and Amina standing very firmly, their chests puffed out and their faces grim. She, on the other hand, wanted to leave like Jett had done. She had a spot guaranteed for her in the ranks of the Military Police, a life of peace and safety inside Wall Sina. She could still convince Eren, Mikasa, and Armin to come with her, even if it meant going back on her word. She could promise them a life of luxury and no needs or wants, she just needed to be more convincing next time.

But as much as her mind wanted to move, her feet remained rooted to her spot. She was so scared, but her body did not quiver in fright. She wished to scream, but her mouth remained shut in a firm line.

She wanted to flee, but she had made a promise, and she would be damned if she went back on her promises.

"Amina..." she finally whispered when she gained a hold of her voice.

The woman turned to her and smiled slightly. "I will die next to you, Sakura."

At that moment she fully understood the meaning behind her words, and a couple of seconds later she was crying quietly, restraining her sobs to the best of her ability. She wasn't crying because her mind recognized the validity behind her words, but she wept because she no longer wanted to leave and join another branch, because she held on to the hope that she had chance to keep her precious friends alive, because she understood that the more people she let past her mental walls, the more pain and suffering she was going to experience.

"Can you die if you're ordered to?" he asked the next twenty-seven members of the Survey Corps.

"No, not yet," Olou answered loudly, his voice devoid of his usual cockiness.

Erwin glanced at him and smiled slightly. "Very well, I like what I see and hear. I welcome everyone here to the Survey Corps. Give me your best salute! This is a show of my respect for you."

The blond gave them all a very firm salute, one that everyone in the crowd returned with just as much fervor. Whether the cadets fully understood what they had signed up for, Sakura wasn't sure. She was the only one in her class that had seen and almost killed a titan, and their appearance and chakra presence still made her shiver whenever she thought about them.

The better question was: was she fully aware of what she had signed up for?

* * *

They spent their last night in the training camp and in the morning they headed to the Survey Corps headquarters, a large terrain consisting of a large training field, a forest with multiple titan-killing courses, and four main buildings: the women's dormitory, the men's dormitory, the higher-ups special quarters, and a storage house that doubled as a stable. The rookies settled in one of the smaller buildings, one especially designed for the newcomers, keeping them away from most of the older members because their duties were different.

Unlike the other branches which had a lot of downtime, the Survey Corps was constantly in action. Every month there was at least one expedition which lasted from five days to a whole week depending on the losses. Sometimes the expeditions didn't even get to be three days long, and on those cases they would have an extra expedition that month. The rest of the time they were practicing and training, improving their survival rate by honing the mind and body. However, the rookies spent most of their time learning the formation instead of training, explaining their relative isolation from the rest of the Survey Corps.

It was absolutely necessary that they knew what to do because their lives were in grave danger the moment they left Trost. As rookies, they were in charge of keeping the spare horses and serving as backup recon units. Not only that, but there could be no more than one rookie in one team of three. A squad was composed of nine teams, and there was a Team Leader in every team. A Senior Team Leader oversaw the other eight and served directly under a Squad Leader, who usually oversaw three whole squads. There was one more Squad Leader, whose name was Levi, but he was in charge of a Special Operations Squad composed of the very best in the Survey Corps. He also was the Second-in-Command of the entire Survey Corps.

During the last week, after having the Long-Range Scouting Formation beaten into their heads, the Survey Corps finally decided to test the physical side of the recruits. First they were given a horse and asked them to ride, just to make sure they knew how to control their horse and change speeds. She had been given a golden brown horse which she had immediately christened as Haruto, even though his name was Samson. For some reason the name fit, especially after she discovered his exuberant personality.

Haruto was hard to handle, but Sakura enjoyed him greatly, sometimes even laughing when she was riding in the fields. Her Team Leader, a blonde woman named Elsie Klein, expressed her surprise in how quickly the horse had taken a liking to her but warned Sakura not to get too attached, since lost or dead horses were a common part of the process.

Still, she would try her best to keep Haruto next to her.

Four days before the expedition, the Survey Corps got out the titan-killing course to assess their skill. As Erwin had explained to the less-than-enthusiastic rookies, they needed to see what their file said about them. Team Leaders with a rookie on their squad were required to watch their own rookie so that they could see their fighting style and decide just how much responsibility the rookie could be entrusted with.

"Are you worried about this expedition?" Petra asked her as the Survey Corps members finished the installation process.

Sakura frowned slightly and nodded. "Scared out of my mind. Titans scare me..."

"Oh really?" Olou said as sarcastically as he could. "What's so scary about giants that eat you alive?"

"Your humor is not appreciated, old man."

"You're older than me, Pinky!"

Amina sighed loudly and pushed them both, earning herself a heated glare from both of her friends. "Stop it. We're not in the mood for your antics."

Before either of them could reply, Squad Leader Mike Zacharius landed in front of the twenty-seven rookies, effectively shutting all of them up. They had heard stories of his prowess and there was no one in the group who did not instantly respect them. Not only that, but the man's presence _demanded _respect from everybody.

"The course is done. The training camp did not care about speed, but here in the Survey Corps one second can mean the end of you or a comrade. So finish as fast and effectively as you can." The rookies dropped their salute and relaxed a bit more, though they were still on edge because of the time restraint. "Also, the part where no one is watching is a lie. Right now you all are our weakest link, and it is good to know about the weakest link. Don't make fools out of yourselves."

With that the man was gone, disappearing into the woods quickly with his 3DMG. His last statement had definitely left everyone on edge. It was hard to know that thirty percent of them would be gone in the next week, but the Survey Corps also pointed out their weakness. In a way, it made them nervous, but they also felt safer, because if the Survey Corps knew their faults and limits, then they were more likely to have better teamwork and a better survival rate.

From what she could hear, Olou and Petra had done exceptionally and were considered to have the highest survival rate, followed by Amina. Now it was her turn to go, after fifty minutes of waiting. Once the soldier stationed at the entrance gave the go, Sakura took off into the woods.

The Survey Corps's titan-course was not the one the Trainee Corps class used. Whereas the other one had titans evenly spaced out and hidden, the titans here had more variety in their locations as well as groupings. Sometimes she had to search for the next titan meanwhile other times it was _right there_. Some titans were by their lonesome meanwhile there was this one time that she had to take down four in one go.

She knew she was doing very good because more people were watching her. The soldiers were hidden in the woods, yes, but their chakra gave them away. She was very impressed by how quiet and cautious they were, to the point that if she were a normal human being she would've never realized she was being tailed. As long as they remained hidden and the titan course remained predictable, she would be fine.

The trees decreased in number and size and soon she saw the end of the forest. Thinking the course was over, Sakura latched the grappling hook to the floor and landed gently, already looking forward to her results. The chakra of six people alerted her that she wasn't alone, and three wooden titans surrounded her, away from any trees. Sakura quickly changed blades and prepared herself to fight again, suddenly on the edge.

She knew they were doing this to emulate the terrain outside the walls, but she still did not appreciate this. She aimed her grappling hook to the foam part of the nearest titan and quickly propelled herself forward with gas. In the middle of her flight she noticed Survey Corps members moving the titan with her in tow, causing her to lose her direction. If her reflexes had been slower, she might've crashed against the floor, which would have been a very grave injury at these speeds. Cursing in her native language, she let go of that hook and aimed to the farthest titan's foam part, knowing from intuition and a little bit of luck that she was going to make it before hitting the ground.

Sakura took advantage that there was a titan in between the one that had moved and the one she was now attached to. She slashed the nape of the middle titan without stopping. This caused her to lose a bit of height, so once she was close to the wooden titan, she aimed her gas down, pushing her up rapidly, and let go completely of all of her hooks once she was high enough. She landed on the foam and sticked to it easily with the help of chakra. Sakura sliced off its nape with both her blades, attached another hook to the the titan that had moved, and finished the course by slashing its nape twice.

Once she was down she put away her things and walked away, though she wasn't sure if she was supposed to do this. When nobody stopped her, she just walked away and back to her dormitory, eager to take a bath, aware of the sets of eyes studying her movements.

* * *

The morning of the expedition was a jittery one for everyone, especially the rookies. It was an unspoken fact that this expedition was going to be many's last, and that kind of knowledge ate away a weaker's person sanity. In that aspect, Sakura had a very high respect for the soldiers of the Survey Corps. They were strong, loyal, and proudly wore the Wings of Freedom on their backs, even if she had started calling them Wings of Death lately in her mind.

Even though she was very sure that she wasn't going to die just yet, she still wrote a letter to Armin, Eren, and Mikasa, updating them about her exploits and status.

"You're writing to your siblings?" If she hadn't felt Petra's chakra coming, she would've jumped.

"Yeah, just in case... you know, something happens."

Petra sighed and plopped down on her bed. "I finally told my dad I joined the Survey Corps and this might be my last letter to him."

Sakura cringed, finding the situation a bit heartless and abrupt. Out of their group of five, Petra had always been the most in tune with other people's feelings, which meant she was fully aware of how much pain she was causing her father. She was about to chastise her for her tactlessness when she remembered something more pressing. "You know, I forgot to ask you: why did you join the Survey Corps?"

"What do you mean?"

"I know Olou was a bit put off by the corruption inside the Military Police," she began, offering part of the truth. Both Jett and her knew that the main reason he had joined the Survey Corps was to be close to Petra, the girl he had been crushing on for the past three years. He might even be in love with her by now, not that she had asked. "But you always wanted to live inside Sina. So why did you go from a life of guaranteed safety to worrying if you're gonna live to see tomorrow?"

Much to her surprise, Petra chuckled and broke the eye contact with Sakura. A little smile remained in her mouth, and with a small voice she asked, "Have you ever felt your life was meaningless or without a purpose?"

She tried to think back to the last six years she had a memory of and look for a moment where she had felt the emptiness Petra had talked about. At first it was finding someone who spoke her language, then it was taking care of Helsa, then her happiness with the Ackermans, then looking after Mikasa and being grateful to the Jaegers, then looking after Mikasa, Eren, and Armin, and, lastly, staying alive to protect them. Her very livelihood was full of purposes, and although she wasn't sure about the _meaningfulness _behind her life, she frankly didn't care. "No," she answered after a few moments, "I haven't felt that yet."

Petra sighed, her smile disappearing. "It's a truly horrible feeling, realizing that your life lacks that special something. Joining the Military Police would've destroyed my opportunity to have a meaningful life with a purpose, meanwhile the Survey Corps makes me feel that just by wearing their insignia on my back."

"Even if that entails having a meaningless death?"

"Yeah, especially that. I think it's much worse having a meaningless life than a meaningless death. Deaths are instant... Lives... not so much."

"Deaths are a bit more permanent, though."

Her amber eyes light up in amusement. "You're just not very aware of that death anymore, are you?"

"How are you so sure?"

Amina walked in, interrupting their conversation. She was fully prepared, with her green cloak on and her 3DMG gear strapped around her hips. In her defense, Sakura already had put on her body-belt, the hardest part of putting on the 3DMG. "Oh, this is where you two were. You do realize breakfast will end in ten minutes, right?"

Petra was up and out in an instant, promising Sakura to save some food. She finished writing her letter, sending her loves and all of that stuff she was supposed to say if these were indeed her last words. In the end, she promised to send a letter immediately after she came back, so she told them not to worry.

"Finish your letter?" Sakura asked absentmindedly, writing a few last things.

"I don't want to write to anybody."

She stopped writing and whipped her head around. "You don't?"

Amina shook her head but then hummed. "Hm.. maybe my parents, but they live inside Wall Sina."

"What the––"

"I think it's best if you go eat, Sakura. We won't eat lunch after we reach the checkpoint."

The kunoichi frowned, not liking the avoidance of the subject. Unfortunately, her friend was right, and Sakura had to leave the room to get her much needed sustenance.

The hallways were devoid of people, who were probably rushing to get some breakfast or doing some last minute preparations. It was this lack of people that forced her to salute Hange Zoe, a Squad Leader of the Survey Corps; usually she would've gotten away with a nod of acknowledgement, but right now she needed to show her respect.

Her brown eyes widened in recognition and her mouth split into a grin. "Ah, you're Sakura Ackerman, right? Of course, you're the only one with pink hair, silly me."

Ah, her hair color followed her wherever she went. She had come to terms with the level of attention she got from it, though, and understood that people were just wondering how the hell that could happen. "Yes, that is me, Squad Leader Hange."

"Good. I've been looking for you! Follow me."

Her stomach growled lightly and she held back a grimace; she really should've eaten earlier. Either way, she was curious as to why such a high-ranking member needed to see her. "Yessir."

Sakura walked a few steps behind her, a customary show of respect that had been drilled into her from training camp. After a few seconds of this arrangement Hange looked back at her and sent her a quizzical look. "Is everything all right? Why are you so far behind?"

She blinked, her green eyes confused. "Isn't this what I'm supposed to do?"

The squad leader's openly laughed, but it was not mocking. "Oh, I completely forgot you were a rookie. Here in the Survey Corps we don't do that; it makes talking a bit awkward."

Sakura sighed in relief and hurried next to Hange. She had to admit she hated these stupid showings of subservience. She was a woman that could carry _ten _times her own weight, make the ground shake with her punches, shoot water and wind from her mouth, and possibly bring back a man or woman from the brink of death; in short, she was a _iryo-nin_. Still, as much as it wounded her pride, she was very aware that she needed to keep her powers hidden, especially now that she was in the Survey Corps. The Military Police might kill her immediately, the Garrison would definitely turn her in, but the Survey Corps would likely turn her into a weapon for the sake of humanity._  
_

"Wow, I think I may have found someone shorter than Levi," she heard her murmur in wonder. Sakura cocked her head to the side; wasn't that the squad leader of that special operations squad?

The walk was not long, because they quickly found the person Hange was looking for. "Ah, there you are. Moblit!"

A man with short brown hair and light brown eyes whipped his head around. He gave his leader a firm salute, more of respect than anything since she could feel the strong respect between the two. "Squad Leader Hange! Is this Sakura?"

"It is!" Hange put a firm hand on her shoulder and pointed at Moblit with the other. "Sakura, this is Moblit Berner, your new team leader. I know this is last minute, but we just reached the decision yesterday to switch you from Elsie's team to Moblit's. Don't worry, he's very qualified, as expected from my second-in-command."

Sakura gave her leader a salute, her eyes determined. "I hope to serve you well, sir."

"Uh, Moblit is fine," the man replied with an embarrassed smile.

The kunoichi looked up at Hange, her eyes confused. "If you don't mind my asking, why the change?"

"Elsie noted that you were a bit too experienced to be on her squad, since we're used to having those of the lower ranks. After watching your performance four days ago, Moblit and I agreed to put you in his team. You are more likely to encounter titans in Moblit's squad––" Sakura stiffened "––but at the same time Moblit's team is more experienced and prepared than Elsie's. So the odds of you surviving are roughly the same."

Her mouth quirked into a grim smile. "I see... What about the team chemistry?"

"We've found that chemistry and trust is best built in the face of titans," Moblit answered her. "The practices you had were mostly to make you feel less nervous."

"Makes me feel much better."

"Well, if you guys are all set we are leaving in ten minutes."

With that Hange was off, leaving Moblit and Sakura alone. It was then that her stomach gave a loud growl, making her blush furiously and Moblit chuckle at her expense.

"As long as you get there in time, you should go get a quick breakfast."

Sakura expressed her thanks and rushed out to the mess hall. She felt a bit nervous to first see the mess hall empty, but sighed in relief when she saw a black-haired man drinking what smelled like tea alone in one of the farther tables, completely relaxed and unhurried. She went to the kitchen part of the mess hall and took a loaf of bread, chomping it in four bites, and then grabbed a glass of water, drinking it in two gulps.

Now all she had to do was finish putting on her 3DMG, get on Haruto, and find her teammates in less than seven minutes. She ran to her room, using a bit of chakra when she was sure there was no one around, and finished putting on her 3DMG. Then she rushed to the stables and felt relief when she saw more people chatting leisurely on top of their horses.

As soon as she mounted Haruto they started moving. Sakura led Haruto with the crowd and they soon reached a line full of around one hundred Survey Corps members. Only one of the three divisions, each of one hundred members, attended expeditions, meanwhile the other two rested. The only ones who attended every expedition were the Squad Leaders, Commander Erwin, and the Senior Team leaders; the other two divisions trained for their next assigned expedition. She heard someone call her name and she moved to the front, the source of the call.

Moblit beckoned her next to him and another blond man. She hurried Haruto but then slowed down to match the speed of their trot once they were next to her. "Sakura, this is Carlo Schneider. He has been with me the past three expeditions."

His blue eyes were warm and he smiled brightly. "Hello, nice to meet you."

She smiled in return, happy to have a friendly face around. "Nice to meet you as well. Uh, why are we so ahead?"

"Our squad is in charge of observing titans, both deviant and normal, so we need to be in a position with the most amount of contact. We hope to capture one some day, but for now we must make do with what we have."

"So we don't kill them?"

Carlo answered, "Only if they threaten formation, which they almost always do. So more often than not, we'll see a titan."

"Oh, okay."

He gave her a quizzical look. "You don't sound... disturbed. Most would be afraid."

Well, most aren't super-powered humans who can control elements and body-flicker their way out of problems. "It's not my first time seeing titans... I don't _want _to see them again, but I'm slightly aware of what I'm getting into."

They were now on Trost's main road, and people were looking at them with respect and awe. Some were even cheering. It made Sakura feel much better about the whole decision, but she still had her misgivings.

They came to a stop in front of the gate. Sakura was so close to the front that she could actually see Commander Erwin easily. He started a countdown for the opening of the gates, which made her heart beat wildly in anticipation, and as soon as the gates opened, they all left at a full gallop. After around five minutes of riding he ordered the groups to divide, all of them splitting up in their respective squads.

Since this was the 28th Expedition, most of the first couple of kilometers were completely devoid of titans. However, just when her arms were about to stop shaking, she felt that horrible chakra she hadn't felt in over three years. It was unnatural, it was terrifying, and it made her whole body shiver. It was as if her own body was warning her there was a predator around and ordering her to _flee_, not get closer.

Sensing chakra wasn't something normal soldiers could do so she kept quiet, simply observing her right ––the place she felt the titan–– with her chakra-enhanced eyesight. So when she finally saw what looked like an seven-meter class, she wasn't surprised at all.

Carlo got out his gun and fired a red flare. The titan moved to grab them but they hurried their horses and easily evaded it. She watched with awe as the other members fired their own flares until a green one was fired, indicating a change in their direction. It was amazing to Sakura how such a simple color could completely change the whole route of their expedition. It made her feel even more respect for her commander's ingenuity.

The next hour or so were spent in relative peace, with flares changing the directions and warning their squad mates of the presence of titans. Even Moblit and Carlo cracked jokes, with Sakura joining in every once in a while. It seemed as if it was going to be a good expedition when she felt her stomach drop.

This chakra was just as horrifying as the other titan chakra, but there was something else about it, something different but at the same time similar enough that made it obvious that it was a titan. The source was straight ahead, and two minutes later she spotted what looked like a nine-meter class dozing in the fields, looking up to the sky.

Moblit and Carlo spotted it around a minute after her. She saw that they prepared themselves, Carlo reaching for his handgrip meanwhile Moblit took out the flare gun.

"What do you think about this one?" the blond asked, staring at Sakura with serious eyes.

It was obvious now that the difference in chakra she felt was because it was a deviant. "He's a bit different. Is he––"

Her words were interrupted by a sudden change in the titan. It immediately stood up, looked around, and took off to the center of the formation. Moblit and Carlo both cursed and took off after it, heading west, not before telling her to stay back and fire the black signal.

She had just finished shooting it when she felt another one of those deviant chakra presences behind heading straight towards her at startling speed. She considered telling Moblit and Carlo, but they were too far away and too busy trying to take that other titan down, in open terrain no less. Comparing Haruto's pace with the titan's, she knew chances were that she wouldn't be able to outrun it.

Sakura cursed shakily in her native tongue and stopped Haruto and turned him around, heading into the direction of the deviant. It was a seven-meter class, with an enlarged torso, small head, and thin legs. Riding straight at him was a disadvantage, but she quickly formulated a plan to turn the situation around. She made Haruto move to the right and once the titan was about to get close to her she sent her hook straight through the titan's right wrist. She propelled herself forward and expertly dodged the left hand that reached for her by shifting her weight and once she was close she slashed straight through its wrist, cutting off its hand with a little help from her chakra.

Before she fell, she took advantage of her new position and sent her hook to its nape. Killing sideways was always tricky because the titan could move its head and munch her before she even realized it, so she shifted her weight again to create a wide arc with the wires. Now she used her gas to fling herself at its nape and cut it off.

Sakura held on tight as the titan fell down and jumped down from its neck, heading to Haruto. The light brown horse neighed happily when he saw her and she mounted with a new sense of pride. She had just taken down that shit _without _using chakra too much. She was just as deserving and good as any other Survey Corps member.

She came across Moblit and Carlo a couple of seconds after trotting, and, from the looks of it, they had seen everything. Sakura wasn't very sure how they were going to react, because although technically she had not broken any orders, she hadn't followed them either. All she knew was that she had taken a titan before it ate one of her comrades and that was good.

"You brought one down all by yourself," Carlo said with a certain degree of awe.

Sakura frowned and ordered Haruto to slow down once she reached them. "If I didn't we could've died. You guys were busy with the bigger one, and I wasn't."

Moblit sped up his horse, attempting to get back into formation, and Carlo and Sakura followed suit. "Still, this will be an interesting development for your next team."

"My next team?"

"They change with every expedition, usually to accommodate losses. Things will look different next time."

She sighed, not completely liking the idea. The only bonds she had formed and nurtured in the training squad were with Petra, Amina, and Olou, the former two because she shared a room with and the latter one because of their competitiveness. Sakura wasn't very good at making friends with other people, mostly because she forgot what their names were or their faces and sometimes even both. She didn't even know what Levi, their famed strongest soldier, looked like, and she had already forgotten Mike Zacharius's appearance. Hange was an exception, mostly because she saw her walking around the rookie quarters more often than most and she was assigned to one of her squads.

It was a bit aggravating that she was just starting to know and make memories about Moblit Berner and Carlo Schneider only for them to be erased before they could be solidified. What was the point of a strong camaraderie if she didn't even get to know the soldiers more intimately? What was the point of team chemistry if they were constantly changing squads?

Maybe the Survey Corps was doing its members a favor. Either one of them three could die at any moment. Would it be better to be sad about the death of that squad mate she just met a couple hours ago or be absolutely devastated about the death of the person who saved your life more than once? There were benefits and costs to each model, but she was a big proponent for balance.

"Don't worry," Carlo said, breaking her from her musings, "I'm sure you'll stay here. Scouts have the highest death rate but they are the most skilled. If Commander Erwin acts like I think he will, you will remain here."

After one more hour of riding they set camp on top of a hill. Erwin proudly said they had lost no men until now, calling it one of the more successful expeditions in their history. Soon the conversation became grimmer, letting his soldiers know that tomorrow they were going to a titan-infested area that they had to clear in order to secure the supply line. The good news was that it was a town with high 3DMG agility, meaning that they were right in their element.

Once the speech was over sunset was almost done, signifying the end of the titan menace for now. Sakura was assigned a tent with two female soldiers she had never seen before. She tried looking for Amina or Petra or, hell, Olou to eat dinner but she couldn't find them anywhere in the camp. She had been looking forward to talking to them, but that would have to wait for another day, it seemed.

Her fellow soldiers with whom she shared a tent were much too tired to even carry a conversation, so after a succinct "goodnight," they quickly fell asleep.

* * *

The expedition was a success: they secured a supply checkpoint, lost only twenty-three men (five of them were her classmates), and accomplished all of that in just three days. Overall, the Survey Corps soldiers were in good spirits.

Riding back from a successful mission was extremely fulfilling. She had found out that the reason Petra, Amina, Olou (and, really, most of her classmates) were missing was because they had either pissed or shitted themselves when they saw titans. Though she hadn't done that in the expedition or when they attacked Shiganshina, she remembered the fear firsthand and how much she _wanted _to shit her pants.

She felt the presence of a titan around two kilometers away from them and methodologically got out her gun and equipped a red flare. Though it was impossible to get used to such horrific chakra, she was starting to force her body to follow a pattern when it came to titans. Mostly she avoided them because fighting each and every one of them would undoubtedly tire her out. Still, two days ago when she was running away from a titan, it had gotten so close that for a second she thought she was really going to die. In the end, Haruto outran it, but just thinking about it would make her heart start beating faster.

"Uh, Sakura, why do you have your gun out? There are no titans around."

She grimaced and tried to hold in her panic. Stupid, stupid, stupid! What a naive mistake! Of course they didn't know why she had gotten out the flare gun: because there was no titan _in sight_, but that didn't mean that it wasn't _there, _around five hundred meters away. Neither Moblit nor Carlo were stupid; once they put two and two together they would realize that she had a gift for sensing titans. She could either come clean right now or explain herself to a more skeptical and distrusting Survey Corps if they found out she had been keeping such important information to herself.

"I... I can _sense _them,"she yelled, trying to speak above the horses' gallops, still unsure if this was the best decision. Didn't Mike Zacharius have a famous nose that could detect titans kilometers away? So then it wouldn't be so strange if she could, right? "There's one around ten seconds away from us."

Neither one of them had the time to be doubtful, because eight seconds later a titan spotted them and started running after them. Sakura immediately released her flare and followed Moblit's lead to run away from it.

Things relaxed once they escaped and Commander Erwin changed the formation.

"Why didn't you say anything before?" Carlo asked loud enough for her to hear.

"I thought I was crazy! But now I confirmed it!"

"We must tell Commander Erwin about this!"

Though Sakura nodded back eagerly, inside she felt her heart clench and her gut drop. So much for keeping a low profile...

So much for not becoming a weapon.

* * *

**2 kilometers is a little bit more than one mile.**

**This is where I take most of my creative liberties when it comes to amnesia. The inability to form new memories is something from anterograde amnesia, not retrograde. However, with author discretion, I think it wouldn't be too far-fetched to say that Sakura has some issues recalling name/faces, so let's just say she's really bad at those, though pre-amnesia Sakura was good at that because of her need to know patients. So, tl;dr yes, the man who was drinking tea alone was Levi. And yes, he'll be appearing next chapter.**

******Though I know Isayama left Hange's gender up for interpretation in the manga (and I mostly follow manga for canon unless noted otherwise), I have to go with the anime and make them female. Why? Because I can't bear to use the plural pronouns when referring to a singular subject (wasn't that last sentence awkward?), and switching from referring to Hange from her to him is just a bit awkward. So, nothing major, but I like sticking to an author's canon with his/her characters so I had to justify this.**

******A million thanks to Arisu-kun, Basia Orci, animagirl, Guest, Jetsmillion, PinKrystal, flevantein, LadyRidger, brokenmaelstrom , I love to review, mun3litKnight , Faeleen Giang Tien, and deansinchester for being so awesome and reviewing. Also, thank you to those who added this story to their alerts and favorites!**

**Comments, criticisms, or concerns are widely appreciated!**

**Penpal**


	7. Sensor

The first day after they came back started rather averagely. They were moved from the rookie quarters and were assigned real rooms in the women's dormitories. Luckily she got to keep Amina and Petra as her roommates plus another girl by the name of Rita Grun, until now a rather average member of the 102nd Trainees Squad but now a soldier of the Survey Corps. After transferring rooms she wrote a new letter to her three wards and threw away the letter she wrote before the expedition, thinking it be better that they didn't even see her last words. Then the Team Leaders made them run laps, spar, and clean their 3DMG before calling it a day by two o'clock.

For a second there, she honestly thought she was going to get away with it. For a moment she believed that Moblit and Carlo had kept her little secret, thinking it was outrageous that anyone would believe them. So when, after taking a shower, a soldier summoned her to Commander Erwin's office, she was a little more than just nervous and crestfallen.

She was scared shitless and devastated.

Sakura dragged her feet against the stone floors with an almost petulant manner to it. She was thinking of ways to go around her problem, explanations as well as possible reasons for her "gift." She was definitely not going to bring up chakra; if she did she might as well write her will and declare her own death sentence. Should she say it was a family thing? But then they might ask if Mikasa had it, or, worse, might dig a little deeper into her background and find out she doesn't really have a biological family. Then perhaps it was a gift from God? No, that was stupid; someone like Commander Erwin would never believe a second of it.

Her feet came to a stop once she reached the door that led to his office. Her heart started to beat wildly and her breaths became harsher. Whatever she said from now on could be used against her and, at the same time, decide the fate of her and her wards' lives. One wrong phrase, one wrong move, and everything could spiral down into a worse mess.

Her green eyes narrowed in annoyance at herself. She was a _kunoichi_, dammit, not some little girl who had been caught stealing candy! She had a great power that, although it brought her a lot of grief, made her a suitable and excellent soldier and asset. If they decided to kill her she would simply run away and make a new life far away from this mess. She didn't need _them_; they needed _her_.

With those thoughts firmly lodged in her mind, she knocked the door twice, opening it after her commander's strong voice allowed her to come in. She entered slowly and her eyes widened after she closed the door. Sitting behind his desk was Commander Erwin, regal and formidable as ever. Behind him and looking out the window stood Mike Zacharius, his tall frame imposing and observant. Perched in one of the two chairs in front of Erwin's desk was Hange, who offered her an encouraging smile and beckoned her to take a seat next to her. A short, familiar black-haired man was leaning his back against the bookshelf, his gray eyes bored and aloof. If she had to take a wild guess that would be Levi.

Sakura saluted briefly before making her way towards the seat Hange had pointed at. She tried to relax herself, but her body stiffened slightly once she noticed that the commander had not said anything because he was reading over her file. Just how much did that change her plans, or her speech? Hopefully she wouldn't be caught lying.

Erwin closed the file and looked up, offering her a small smile. "Good evening, Sakura. Thank you for coming, even if you are done with your duties by now."

It's not like she could refuse an order from her commanding officer, but she didn't give that thought a voice. Not knowing what to say without sounding snarky, she nodded, urging him to continue.

"Moblit Berner and Carlo Schneider informed me personally and more detailedly in their report that you have the ability to sense titans. Is this true?"

"Yes, I can."

Mike's hazel eyes became interested and he stepped closer until he was standing next to Erwin's desk. "How so?"

Indeed, how could she explain her sensing abilities to them without mentioning chakra? She squirmed slightly, unsure on how to correctly respond without endangering herself. "I don't know how to explain it... It's a horrifying feeling, like when you _know _something bad is going to happen. It's eery, it gives me goosebumps, but sure enough a titan is there. Deviants feel different too... I don't know how to explain it."

"Amazing," Hange whispered. "You wouldn't mind us testing it, right?"

Sakura blinked. Well, that was easier than what she thought. She had come prepared to answered a barrage of questions, but right now they were just asking for proof. "Right now?"

"That doesn't sound like a bad idea," Erwin added. "If this is true, it could change my plans. It'd be best to prove it as soon as possible. Hange, Levi, get ready: we're leaving in ten minutes. Mike, you're in charge until I come back."

Hange jumped to her feet and left immediately, obviously enthusiastic about the test.

"Tch, this brat better not be wasting our time."

Sakura bristled at his comment. Was he calling _her _a _brat_? She wasn't just any run-of-the-mill person who had just managed to join the Survey Corps. She could break every single one of his bones before he even had a chance to scream, and he dared belittle her?**  
**

She sighed and calmed herself down. Maybe she was overreacting a bit, but she definitely did _not _like his tone.

Erwin smiled at her slightly, as if apologizing for his subordinate. "Go get ready, Sakura. I don't think this will take longer than a few hours, but still be prepared."

The pink-haired woman was the last one to arrive to their little group. It had taken her a while for her to convince Haruto to leave the stall. He, just like her, wasn't too keen in going outside the walls, especially since they had just arrived a day ago. She understood why Erwin wanted to confirm the validity of her teammates' report, but at the same time she wasn't exactly sure why he was placing so much emphasis in finding if this was true. It seemed a bit risky to endanger their lives right now when he could find out in the next expedition.

The journey to Trost's gate was silent from Levi and Erwin's part, but Hange kept asking her questions, mostly as to the probable origins of her gift. She played the innocent card, claiming that she had assumed that it was nervousness the first three times she felt it and finally caught on later on, but she still didn't believe it herself.

Convincing the Garrison to open the gate took less than five minutes, mostly because of Erwin's commanding tone. Once it was opened, the blond commander charged at full speed, forcing his three subordinates to do the same in order to follow behind him.

After around twenty minutes of a harsh ride, Erwin slowed down until he was riding next to them. "If you feel a titan, let us know immediately!" he yelled above the loud gallops of their horses.

The next thirty minutes were spent in stony silence. For once in her life, she didn't know if she wanted to see a titan or not. On one hand, if they didn't see one, they might think that this was a farce and leave the issue for later, but on the other hand she wanted to prove to them that she wasn't lying. It was a conflicting emotion, wanting to do opposite things for opposite reasons. She was irritated with herself for being so ambivalent about something so important. Why couldn't she make up her mind, dammit?

Luckily for her, the choice was made in her stead. She sensed a titan's chakra around two and a half kilometers to the northwest. It surprised her, because she hadn't felt a titan at such a long range before, meaning that she could hone this skill. Before she inform them of her findings, she detected a deviant chakra a bit further away from the other titan, but still close enough for her to detect it.

"Two titans, one deviant and one normal. Northwest, around two kilometers from here," she shouted.

Erwin nodded, acknowledging her statement, and changed their course, though he slowed down considerably so as to not draw any unwanted attention. Sure enough, there they were: one of them was sitting down, looking up to the sky, and the other one had its back facing them, staring off into the distance. They came to a stop before either one of them could notice, observing the titans warily.

"Which one is the deviant?" Hange whispered.

"The one standing up."

"So you can feel these shits' presence? That's lovely."

She had to hold in her scowl.

"Let's go back before they see us."

Sakura didn't know if Erwin had jinxing powers, but for a second she was convinced, because the moment that utterance left his lips the two titans noticed them and immediately started chasing them. The commander ordered an immediate retreat, one that she followed without protests. Not only was she unlike Eren in his urge to slaughter titans, but she didn't know how well she would be able to hide her natural superiority in the face of such experienced and observant people. The assimilation process had gone off well, and if she wanted to live a peaceful life, she needed to keep her head down.

Haruto ran fast and hard for a few minutes and it seemed as if they were going to be able to outrun them when she felt three more titan presences ahead of them, two coming from the right and a deviant one from the left. Though they were around two kilometers away, they were closing in quickly, meaning they would graze them or, worse, come in contact with them.

"Three titans ahead! One is a deviant! They will close in on us!"

She expected nervous reactions, but Levi still looked bored, Hange still looked ecstatic, and Erwin.. Well, he did change a bit; now he looked _annoyed. _Apparently the idea of having to fight with titans didn't faze them as much as it did to her. On the positive side, at leas the two titans that were chasing them had grown tired and stopped.

"Hange, take care of the deviant. I'll bring down the other two," Levi ordered in his monotone voice. His aloof gray eyes landed on her next, "You... make sure you don't get eaten or this will be a big waste of time."

She scowled slightly and bit back, "I'm not about to become titan food... Sir."

His eyes glinted, maybe as a warning, maybe as a sign of recognition, Sakura wasn't sure. All she knew was that none of them were surprised when the four-meter, five-meter, and seven-meter class titans appeared, running at them at full speed. It was aggravating that they lacked a semblance of intelligence, because at least then what they were doing had a purpose and they would be able to predict their moves. At the same time, though, their lack of intelligence made them vulnerable to begin with.

Hange and Levi were off once they were close enough, leaving Erwin and Sakura running back to the gate. She knew she had to keep her eyes on the field, watching for any dangers if her sensing ability failed her, but she couldn't help to look back and see how masterfully Levi and Hange fought, particularly the black-haired man. His 3DMG skills were smooth, his form was strong and graceful, and his speed put hers to shame. Watching him fight made her realize just why he was considered Humanity's Strongest, and that as good as she was, she still had long ways to go before she was on par with him in titan-slaying.

They continued riding for a little while until Erwin suggested (he really ordered) to stop and wait for Hange and Levi, relying on her sensing skills to be on the lookout for any danger. He used this time to ask a little bit more about her ability, hoping to clear what exactly she could do and what were her limits. Now she felt more relaxed, because it was obvious that they weren't out to get her and instead wanted her help. She answered their questions a bit more truthfully meanwhile still avoiding the topic of chakra.

She didn't have to wait much longer, because her superiors came back almost five minutes later, bickering over something about titan appendages. (Well, Hange was doing most of the talking meanwhile Levi just replied with a deadpan "no," making Hange talk even more animatedly.) The four Survey Corps members then hurried back inside Wall Rose, and luckily Sakura felt no more titans on their way back.

Erwin delegated the duties of tending all of their horses to the soldiers on standby, allowing them to head immediately to his office. Almost all the soldiers saluted them on their way there, since by now most were heading down to the mess hall to eat, leaving Sakura a bit uncomfortable; they were saluting everyone _but _her. It's not like she had done anything worthy of deserving their respect yet, but it still made her feel out of place.

Sakura closed the door gently behind her and took a seat next to Hange, Erwin sat at the other side of his desk, and Levi leaned against the window behind Erwin. Mike's imposing image was no longer there, but the air was still slightly oppressive, especially after she processed the interest in their eyes.

"Though I don't know how you came across such ability, I am glad to confirm its validity," the blond began with a much more satisfied expression. Whatever he saw had pleased him greatly, because his shoulders were no longer as uptight and now were a bit more relaxed. "Not to say you weren't an asset before, because you graduated first in your class, correct? And received good comments from Emil Ernst... I know firsthand how hard that is. But sensing titans will definitely come in handy for our expeditions."

Hange stretched in her chair and sighed contentedly. "Well, it's a good thing you're in my squad, Sakura. You'll be quite the asset in locating titans and keeping yourself alive. Maybe now we'll be able to catch one!"

Surprisingly, the commander smiled amusedly. "You're getting a bit ahead of yourself there, Hange."

"What do you mean?"

"He means that she'll be probably joining my squad if she's as good as your two subordinates say she is, Hange," Levi replied with an arrogant smirk.

Erwin furrowed his brows and shook his head. "No, no, her ability falls perfectly in the Scouting Formation category."

"My squad is in charge of patrols before going on expeditions, Erwin. A sensor would not only make our job easier, but reduce our risks. Even after that we're usually the ones sent to take down most of the titans in expeditions."

"And the only way to defeat your enemy is by learning it. You've always said that we couldn't risk men to search for titans and then endanger them again trying to catch one. Well, this reduces one of those risks! We can finally get a test subject!"

"Placing her in the front of the Scouting Formation changes our strategy from a reactive one to a proactive one. That could save countless lives and create even more experienced soldiers. We need a better survival rate."

The three argued back and forth, attacking the others' viewpoints and defending their own. Any other person might've felt excited that three highly respectable members were fighting to have her on their respective squad, but Sakura only felt aggravated that she had no choice. They had not once asked her what she preferred, what she thought was better, who she wanted to be with; they just assumed she had no opinion to begin with, or dismissed it immediately because she didn't have a rank.

Getting used to the Survey Corps was a bit harder than what she expected. In the 102nd Trainees Squad she was a prodigy, respected by everyone, and that meant that her opinion and well-being were heavily considered, sometimes even by her instructors, who were supposed to not care. In here, though, she was just another soldier fighting for her life. Not only that, but no one had once denied she was a prodigy, meaning they were aware she was a genius and they _still _did not give her the time of day. She had never been considered trivial, ever.

Perhaps she really was a brat who did not know better. Maybe she was childish for thinking that people had to immediately care, to respect her instantly. They weren't fully aware of what exactly she was ––and that was good, otherwise she wouldn't be in her commander's office observing this discussion and would instead be in a dungeon meanwhile higher-ups decided her fate in her absence –– but it was because she knew what she was and _they _didn't that she couldn't hold back, couldn't let them ignore her.

She cleared her throat, and three gazes snapped at her, their stares boring into her face. Whether they were incredulous that she had dared interrupt them or simply curious as to what she had to say, she didn't know, and, quite frankly, at the moment she didn't care. She straightened her back and narrowed her eyes slightly, taking control of her beating heart. "I agree with Commander Erwin and believe that my sensor ability would be much useful in the front." Her voice was firm, confident, just exactly the image she wanted to give.

Levi glared at her, but she didn't back down and icily stared back. Though she respected his fighting skill, she did not appreciate his rudeness and general unapproachability. She had to admit that one of the reasons she had chosen Erwin's side over Levi's was because of the bad impression she had of him; teamwork was very important in her books and if she couldn't work with him then she was just wasting her and his time.

The commander was surprised by her impertinence and the darkening of her demeanor. She had been gentle and obedient outside Rose, giving the image of the perfect soldier, so seeing her not only talking out of place but offering an unasked opinion was unexpected. He would let this one slide because her words helped his cause, though perhaps a bit of disciplining in the long run wouldn't hurt. "You aren't concerned about being in the front?"

"I don't plan on dying anytime soon, and I'm not half-bad with 3DMG."

Levi scoffed and started walking towards the door. "The deaths of my teammates will be on your shoulders." With one last glare directed at both Erwin and Sakura, Levi left the room, his steps calm and relaxed, but the kunoichi was perceptive enough to see the tension in his shoulders.

Hange whistled. "Well, prissy pants is a sore loser, who would've known?"

The blond frowned slightly, but managed to give Sakura a small smile. "Don't mind that comment too much. He's just worried about his teammates first and foremost."

That sounded more like a battle of will and pride than a battle for the well-being of his teammates, but she remained quiet, knowing that her comment would be taking it too far. Besides, as much as she disliked the guy, she knew next to nothing about the Captain and it would be too unfair to contest Erwin's opinion of him considering they knew each other for longer.

Still, she didn't like him at all.

* * *

Amina asked Sakura to practice hand-to-hand, considering that the Survey Corps placed more emphasis on it than their instructors did. Their mentality was that their 3DMG skills was half the battle when it came to titans; the other half was made up of reflexes, powerful, and fitness, which were all achieved with a good spar. Indeed, if they couldn't take down a human their own size, what made them think they could take down a titan several times their height and power?

Unlike her other classmates, who paid less attention to martial arts, Sakura focused almost all her time in it, relearning and perfecting her taijutsu. In the first couple of months she spent with Helsa, her body would unwittingly moved at times when she wanted to fight, but she wasn't exactly aware of how she learned things. It helped that she volunteered to teach Mikasa and Eren (and later, Armin), because that sent her down a road in which she analyzed her fighting style. Now nobody knew where she had learned those moves, but everyone was always in awe of her speed and strength, to the point that she was chosen as a sparring proctor for both experienced and rookie soldiers.

"You never told me what how you felt about the expedition."

"It was horrifying. I seriously thought for a couple of moments that I was going to die. I don't want to go back."

Sakura hummed in agreement and aimed a light, high kick to her neck, which she sloppily dodged. "You should've chosen the Garrison, Amina."

Her dark eyes narrowed and she threw a vicious punch at her, which caught her off guard because Amina was usually calmer in her attacks, but nevertheless she easily dodged it. "Are you calling me weak? Worthless?"

"N-No, I never said that. What are you talking about?"

"You don't think I'm able to keep myself safe? Is that it?"

The kunoichi kept dodging her sudden onslaught, too invested in the conversation to retaliate. "Amina, calm down. I'm not saying that. I'm just saying you wouldn't have to worry about dying if you had joined the Garrison, that's all."

Her friend grit her teeth and she suddenly stopped, leaving her standing strangely still in the training grounds. It was a bit hard to see her expression, because the sun was almost down, but Sakura could detect a hint of bitterness in her expression. "Why does everyone think that? That I'm always out for my neck? My dad said it and I thought I had changed, but obviously you think I don't."

"I don't... understand, at all."

"You're not even entirely sure of who I am, right?"

Well, sparring was _obviously _forgotten, seeing as how Amina suddenly plopped down to the grass. Not that Sakura minded, at all; the subject of Amina's origins was a touchy one. She always avoided speaking of her parents whenever Petra or Sakura did, or she conveniently excused herself. Her inquisitive mind had deduced that her family had been recently killed and the subject was too painful to talk about, but before leaving to the expedition she had said her family _lived _inside Wall Sina.

"You're not too talkative about that subject."

She scratched behind her ear, her face a bit embarrassed. "Hm, now that we're here, I guess it wouldn't matter if I told you."

"Stop beating around the bush already. You don't know how much time Petra and I have spent theorizing about this."

Amina blushed harder, and she harshly bit her lower lip. "I didn't know you guys were so curious..."

"Amina."

"Right, right, sorry. My last name is Talman because my father's side of the family came from the desert, before the walls were erected and the titans came. And before you ask, no, my dad never told me anything about the desert because he didn't know anything about it. Anyway, my mom is a Burgeis. Here in the Survey Corps that means nothing, but inside Wall Sina it means the whole world. Suffice to say we're a powerful family.

"My mother was raised in wealth and luxury, but my dad had no such luck and worked hard to rise the social ladder. He married my mother, much to the disdain of the Burgeis, and had me a few years later. Although my grandparents hated my dad, they adored me and the Burgeis family spoiled me rotten to the point I became a brat.

"My dad became ashamed of what I had become and when I turned fifteen he told me I needed a change in my lifestyle and perspective. He made a deal with the Military Police so that I wouldn't do the entrance exam and told me to not come back until I had graduated from the camp. I was obviously very hurt by this, and though he never said I had to graduate with good marks or anything, I strove to become better than the plebs and prove I was superior even though I didn't know anything the average person went through. I wanted to place in the top ten to earn my way back to Sina and prove to my dad that I knew how to work hard."

Though she was intently listening to Amina's story, things suddenly began making sense. The reason behind her physical weakness, her haughtiness, her self-assurance, and the commanding air she carried around her could all be traced back to her noble upbringing. However, there was one gaping hole in her story. "But yet... Here you are."

She sighed and nodded along. "Indeed, here I am... My family has everything anyone could ever desire, but I am here, worrying about my death at the hands of titans."

Her life was what Sakura envisioned for her wards, what she wanted to provide for the people she cared most about in the world. And yet, her friend from a completely different social stratum was sitting next to her in the same grassy field, looking at the same sunset, wondering the same thoughts of survival. She didn't know whether to admire her or be angry at her for throwing such a life many coveted. Sakura frowned; she was being unfair. It was hard being rich, for people strove to become like them but at the same time scorned them for who they were, and when the odd one decided to leave everything behind, people like herself started judging them for their _stupid_ decisions.

"Why are you here then?"

Amina turned slowly to gaze at her intensely, her pensive look long gone. "You. I'm here for you, I'm here for Petra, I'm here for Olou, I'm here for the Talman and the Burgeis. I have to admit, it was a tough decision, and not placing in the top ten made me seriously think I had no chance at surviving outside the walls and that I was going to surely die, but I couldn't live my life knowing my friends died so that I could live inside parading fancy dresses and being courted by wealthy men... That wasn't the life I wanted anymore."

"What about your dad?"

She looked up to the night sky. The stars were coming out and dinner would be served soon, but Sakura didn't want to rush Amina. "He'll get used to it, I think. This is his fault in some roundabout way after all. My mother... Well, unless she asks the king or something, I don't think she will be able to do much about this. Civilian and military affairs are different for that reason."

"I won't let you be eaten, Amina, I promise. No titan will kill you."

Amina smirked. "That's a hefty promise, considering you are in the front with Commander Erwin."

Sakura blinked, taken aback. She had only told Petra an hour ago because Amina was out, so there was no way their friend could've told her. "How do you know?"

"Word spreads around fast about that pink-haired girl who can sense titans. People honestly believe you can make a difference and that the fatality rate will go down, but how sure are you of that?"

The kunoichi gulped, feeling nervous of the sudden attention and pressure she was getting. She knew that her range was good, but why were people immediately assuming that she would bring about such drastic changes? That just brought an unnecessary burden on her shoulders. "I... I don't want to give anyone false hopes."

"So it's true."

"Amina! No, I don't know if it's true, it's too early to tell."

"You're weird, you know that? But I guess that makes you special in your own way."

She was walking on a fine line between what she abilities she could reveal and the ones she could keep hidden. It was imperative to keep her secrets close to her heart if she wanted to stay around as a normal soldier and protect Mikasa, Eren, and Armin to her heart's content as equals, but at the same time she wasn't ready to deal with the deaths of her friends. There would be a moment where she would have to choose one group over the other. If it came down to it, would she save Petra or Amina or Olou from death, even if it meant using her medical ninjutsu and being found out? Judging by the promise she had explicitly made Amina (and implicitly to her other two best friends), the answer was yes.

And that answer scared her so much.

* * *

For the next month Sakura trained intensively with Nanaba, the fourth Squad Leader of the Survey Corps. She was ruthless but supportive, always trying to push her to her limits for her own sake. Had her body not been enhanced and fit, she would've probably complained and collapsed from the sheer amount of spars, wooden titan courses, laps, and weight lifting she had done.

Suffice to say she barely had enough time to talk to Amina and Petra, because as soon as she got to her room after a hearty dinner and warm shower she only collapsed on her bed. Not that she didn't know how things were going, since they were chatterboxes, but they didn't get to socialize that often anymore.

The day before the 29th Expedition, Nanaba confided in Sakura that she was not very worried about her survival. She was put in a precarious position, because not only was it necessary to be in the first row of the Scouting Formation to detect incoming titans, but she was also obligated to protect Commander Erwin with her life. However, the Survey Corps had given her Nanaba as a personal trainer to hone her body and increase her survival rate and her ability to be an asset on the field.

Sakura was behind Mike, Erwin, Levi, Nanaba, and Hange in the line as they waited for the gates to open. Haruto kept snorting and moving his head, obviously bored and itching to gallop. Of course he was excited; his natural predators weren't titans and he was going to run his heart's content. Sakura grunted and tightened the reins on Haruto.

"Samson giving you some trouble?" her teammate, Gelgar Becker, asked amusedly. His hair was a sandy brown and the lines of his face were harsh, but the joviality behind his blue eyes gave revealed an inner softness.

She scowled at him. "His name is Haruto."

Her other team member, Otto Langer, snorted and waved his hand disinterestedly. "Come on, you don't expect us to remember a name like that. It sounds just as weird as yours." His dark brown eyes were teasing, letting her know that he didn't mean his words.

Still, Sakura raised her chin, carrying on with the joke. "Well, that just shows how unique my and Haruto's names are."

"Samson," Otto corrected in with a grin.

She tried to deepen her scowl, but failed and laughed openly. "You two are going to be the death of me."

Erwin started the countdown then, effectively shutting them up. After seemingly everlasting seconds, the gate opened and they all spurred their horses forward, leaving a trail of dusk at their wake.

The Special Operations Squad's patrol had disposed of titans in the first couple of kilometers, securing their passage. They had one of the hardest and most dangerous jobs, since they basically searched for fights in open terrains, but at the same time their expertise made their squad one of the safest to be in, since they all had amazing team chemistry and they were led by none other than Levi himself.

After they split up, Sakura hurried Haruto so that they would be less than three strides away from Erwin. The strategy was simple: alert Erwin of incoming titans so that they could change their position. Since she was at the center and her range was less than three kilometers, Erwin still relied on scouts for the Formation's peripherals.

Sakura stiffened when she felt them two and a half kilometers ahead of them, two kilometers to the right, and immediately warned her commander. He nodded and fired a green flare, signifying the change in course. They continued like this, changing course as soon as Sakura warned the presence of a titan or a scout fired a red flare.

Near the end of their ride to their destination, they encountered a slight problem: two titan clusters and the inevitable collision with one of them. The larger one, a a group of nine, was on three kilometers to the left, two kilometers ahead, and had three deviants, meanwhile the one to the right had a group of four and was a kilometer to the right, three and a half kilometers ahead, and had one deviant. Changing the course to the left and avoiding an encounter with the right group would force the left side of the Formation to engage with the titans, incurring guaranteed losses. However, if Erwin changed the course to the right, his squad would come into direct contact with the titans.

"Commander," Otto yelled over the noise, attracting his attention. "We can take care of the issue."

Gelgar nodded firmly. "This is what we trained for! We won't die."

Erwin looked at both his sides, making eye contact with his three subordinates. His icy blue eyes were outwardly calm, but she could tell the conflict that was going on in his head: was the risk worth it? Only Gelgar, Otto, and Sakura would fight; Erwin would stay a safe distance away, only fighting if it was absolutely necessary. As their commander, his safety was top priority.

Maybe he decided that the chances were in their favor, maybe he realized that his squad was elite, or maybe he simply decided to trust in them, because he pointed his flare gun to the right and led them straight to the titans.

Her heart started beating faster and her breaths became harsher as she neared the giants. A four-meter deviant, a seven-meter, a nine-meter, and twelve-meter immediately came after them the moment they spotted their prey. Haruto slowed down a bit, no doubt intimidated by humanity's predators, but he appeared to trust her judgement enough because he kept going forward, regardless of his instincts, surpassing the speed of her teammates' horses. Once she was close enough, she aimed her grappling hooks directly at the eyes of the deviant and advanced forward as soon as they made their mark.

Using a combination of gas intensity and weight shifting, Sakura avoided its hands and landed on top of its bald head. She ran to the back of its skull and jumped in the air, using chakra to increase the height and twist herself in the air, and attached the grappling hook to its nape, slicing through it with ease. The other twelve-meter class tried to reach for her, but she dove straight down to the ground, narrowly dodging its hands. Seconds before hitting the ground she sent her grappling hook straight through the titan's left hand, stopping her descent.

Just as she expected, the pain (or suddenness of the attack; Sakura wasn't sure if they could feel pain like she could) made it jerk its hand skyward, trying to get rid of the hook, taking Sakura along for a convulsive ride, immediately using her chakra to heighten all her reflexes and senses. Once she was sufficiently high up in the sky and with enough momentum, she let go of the hook and was sent flying behind the titan. She twisted her body around to fire the hooks to the neck, even if she was upside down. Still, the kill was clean, and she landed on the ground gently, the blood evaporating from her green cloak.

The kunoichi felt the fall of two more titans and turned around to see her two teammates safe and sound. They each had taken down their own titan, demonstrating their prowess and agility.

"Holy shit you took down the deviant and twelve-meter without touching the ground..." Otto said, his voice awed. "How in the hell?"

"Fast reflexes," she answered, suddenly uncomfortable at the attention.

"Those were some advanced moves. Are you sure you're a rookie?"

Erwin and his white horse approached Gelgar. Behind him were their three horses, calm and snorting happily. At least they hadn't run away like most did. "I'm sure it would be unfair to classify her as a rookie by now," he interjected, his voice warm. "We won't worry too much about your well-being anymore."

Sakura mounted Haruto and smiled sincerely, glad to no longer be considered inexperienced or in need of babying. Though she knew it was simply a consequence of keeping the majority of her potential hidden, she still didn't want to be regarded as the weak link, someone to be looked after. At least no one would regard her as a weakling anymore.

The rest of the expedition went by with only four losses. They reached one of the supply camps they had established in earlier expeditions and decided to rest there. The night watch groups took the job of looking out for any abnormal activity meanwhile the others rested. The outlook of the Survey Corps was bright, everyone was in a good mood, and success was imminent.

* * *

_"So you inherited the chakra nature of your father? Good, water is good. I expect good things from you, Sakura. Suguru has made us very proud, and with much gratitude we call him our son. Earn your place in our family, because you can do it."_

* * *

Sakura felt a breeze in her hair and unwittingly woke up. Her camping mates, two women whose names she couldn't quite remember, where still sleeping soundly, completely unaware of her harsh breathing.

She knew she had dreamed something important, but as soon as she woke up the exact details faded into nothingness, as if completely forgotten. It was impossible for there to be wind inside their tent, because there was no wind outside, but maybe something had happened that she was unaware of.

Sakura tried going back to sleep but failed. Whether it was because her excitement or disappointment or wonder at the the mystery, her body no longer felt tired. She took off the sheets from her body and dressed herself in her uniform, feeling uncomfortable going out in her nightgown. It had taken her an hour to put on all the belts the first time she had tried to fully dress herself. The belts were supposed to be tight and connected to every part of her body. Sometimes they snapped back into previous positions, other times she couldn't stretch them enough to get through, and there were other times where she simply didn't know where to put her limbs.

Luckily, practice made permanent, so now it only took her twenty minutes on a bad day. It would be sunrise soon, anyway, so might as well get her blades and 3DMG ready.

The camp was a bit eery in the darkness, the lack of noise and danger getting to her. Titans were more inactive at night than day, but that didn't mean they couldn't be attacked. That is why they had seven of their one hundred twelve stationed for night duty. They were usually in the middle of the formation, one of the safest places in order to secure their survival.

She didn't feel like explaining to others why she was out, so she used her kunoichi tact and agility to remain hidden. It was almost too easy to wander camp undetected, but for some reason the tent that housed their supplies was heavily guarded, if the two chakra presences inside the tent were of any indication. If she wanted to practice her skills, she would have to do it without weapons. Was it a risk worth taking? She could just go back to her room and rest, but at the same time she needed to practice. She hadn't been able to train her ninjutsu the past month because her sessions with Nanaba had consumed all her stamina. But now... There might not be a better time.

They had camped close to a forest of giant trees so that worse comes to worse, they could all fight in a place with high maneuverability and launch a counteroffensive. This was the third forest she had seen like that, but there was no concrete explanation for the size of the trees. Sakura leaped to the first branch and started going to a more secluded place, mindful to leave a trail just in case she forgot the way back. Once she was sufficiently far away, she started going over the hand seals for the three jutsu she knew and performing them to the best of her ability.

When she had stayed with Helsa, she had found out that her chakra reserves were a bit low, but after training constantly for almost seven years the amount of chakra she had at her disposal had tripled. Now her limit was seven jutsu, but she knew that she still hadn't pushed her body enough and there was room for improvement.

After she finished _**Suiton: Bakusui Shoha**_, she felt a deviant's chakra around three kilometers from her, moving at great speeds towards their camp. She looked up and noticed that the sky had lightened, signifying the start of dawn. She knew that the night watch would eventually take down this deviant, but it was almost guaranteed that someone would die in the process.

She body-flickered closer to the titan and started leaping from tree branch to tree branch, trying to keep up with the giant. She may have her 3DMG, but she was weaponless, rendering it useless. At the same time, fighting a titan without 3DMG and only relying on her reflexes and chakra was a bad call on her part, since aerial fighting was hard with their unpredictability and size. If she wanted to use her powers, she only had one shot before the titan potentially retaliated.

Sakura saw the ten-meter deviant sprinting and she herself started leaping faster until she was ahead of it. She threw herself at it, but miscalculated the distance and landed on its lower neck, a bit too far away from the actual spot. She tried to move, to stand up, but the titan was moving at such great speeds that the momentum kept her clutching the titan's lower neck with her chakra-enhanced hands.

The camp was very close now, which bore bad news for Sakura, not only because it might kill some of her comrades, but she would have to explain why she was breaking protocol and potentially attracting titans. Her fingertips barely reached the area in the nape that could kill titans, meaning she couldn't punch it and instantly kill it.

The intensity of the chakra she was using to fight against the momentum and stick to the titan made her body glow lightly blue. She could feel her already-low reserves getting even emptier, taking away precious energy she could use later on the day. Couldn't she use chakra on the offensive, anyway?

Sakura focused the chakra on her hands until it resembled a small, sharp blade. Though her mind didn't recall ever doing this, her body remembered performing this countless times, probably to save lives. But this technique had a more insidious effect than just saving lives. No, it was a blade, and it could be used to cut just like any other weapon.

She couldn't crawl, but she could certainly reach a little bit more to touch the nape and slice the titan twice. She cursed her small height and stretched her arm the furthest she could. Once she reached the threshold, she slid her fingertips from right to left, the lower from left to right, and the effect was instantaneous. Though outwardly it looked as if nothing had happened, the focused chakra on her hands had cut the deviant's muscles and tendons, creating the same effect as if she had cut it with a blade. It was a Chakra Scalpel. Suffice to say it was a very clean kill.

Unfortunately, the titan immediately fell down and crashed against a tree, the sound so loud it definitely woke up the whole camp, especially with how close they were to it. Luckily the same body that had given her such trouble shielded her from most of the impact, but she still felt a bit dizzy going from such blinding speeds to a complete stop.

Her sensitive ears picked up the telltale sign of 3DMG usage, meaning that people had heard and were investigating already. Rather than explain how she killed a titan without the use of blades or 3DMG, Sakura jumped higher up to the trees and hid herself amongst the leaves. A couple of seconds later the Special Operations Squad appeared and cut off the titan's nape, even though the it was already steaming and decomposing.

Levi stood next to the neck, and though Sakura could not see his expression, she knew he was in deep thought.

"Captain, the titan was already dead when we got here," one of the squad members, a woman named Liesel Sommer, reported to the black-haired man.

"I can see that." His usually monotone voice was tinged with annoyance. "The question is _why. _Why is this shithead dead without being hit in the nape of the neck? Or, better yet, _how_? In this case, the result doesn't matter; the process does."

"And then what do we do?" Jung Busch asked, though not impolitely. "Do we capture the person who killed the titan and saved some of our lives?"

"I hope you're not telling me that we shouldn't investigate simply because we don't know what to do to whoever did this, because that's stupid. It's possible that it's an animal that can kill titan, and wouldn't you want to have an animal like that at your disposal? Or it could be a human with an ability we have never seen before. Whatever it is, using it to our advantage is what we want."

His squad quieted down after that and started searching the area a bit more intensely. Levi himself looked around with his calculating eyes. There was a moment she thought she had been found out because he had looked right at her, but her fears were erased when he didn't react and kept surveying the area.

Levi sighed and shook his head. "There's no use in looking for it. We're never going to find it in this giant ass forest and there's no time to waste right now. Let's go and report this to Erwin."

Once she was sure they were gone Sakura headed back to the camp and easily slipped without notice due to the commotion the deviant had caused. Theories were running rampant, citing that maybe the titan ran out of sunlight or there was a sickness that only affected them, but whatever the speculation was it only served to heighten their spirits, saying this was one step for humanity.

Sakura only felt uncomfortable about this. Even though her comrades approved of what she had done, she couldn't help but think back to what Levi had said about her existence. She would be _at their disposal _or _used to their advantage_. She understood the mentality behind it, but she couldn't get rid of the aspects that made her human. Sacrifices had to be made for the betterment of humanity, but it wasn't such an easy decision to make when it was _her _sacrifice that was being called into question. _  
_

Besides, she had promises to keep. Mikasa, Armin, and Eren needed her around as a source of comfort and protection, and the only way she could keep Petra, Olou, and Amina safe was by being on the same leagues as them, socializing with them, practicing with them. Making her a weapon would affect them just as much as it would affect her.

Four days later and the 29th Expedition was labeled another success for humanity, bringing back only eight deaths, mostly because of the improved titan detection system. It was with this that Sakura felt content with what she was doing.

This was as much as she could give back, because the rest wasn't hers to give.

The Survey Corps would have to be content with a sensor.

* * *

**For the titan scene, the reason why Sakura didn't punch it was because since she was attached vertically to it, punching it would've sent them both flying forwards. I don't think she would've liked being attached to the titan on the ride.**

**I know about the story of Kaguya and how it conflicts with this story because there is no God Tree in SnK universe, therefore no possibility of anyone having chakra. However, personally, I think this is more of a legend than a historical fact, and if it is a historical fact then it's a pretty shitty one because it leaves a bunch of plot holes like how is it that all living things have chakra if they never got it from the God Tree and if only humans get chakra then it doesn't explain how Summons have chakra. So, in the end, The Vessel's stance on chakra is that all living things have chakra to some degree, meanwhile only certain individuals have chakra points, granting them the ability to mould chakra, and this was what the Sage and Kaguya inherited from the God Tree. I usually stick with canon for explanations on how certain things came to be but I couldn't stick with this one fact because I severely dislike creation stories that don't make any sense. **

**Yet again, an innumerable amount of thanks to PinchofSalt, Bum reviews, cj1of4, Basia Orci, Faeleen Giang Tien, animagirl, UchihaNaruTeme4, levantein, LadyRidger, PinKrystal, AmeRaSora, Guest, lazylady, Liber Fatum, brokenmaelstrom, Guest, Alumi, Yuyui, Demon Flame, FairiesDescent, Rose Rain 7, and lilazngirlz. Your reviews are a delight to read and make me warm. Also, thank you to those who added this story to their alerts and favorites! I'm glad this project has piqued your attention.**


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